77. Sarah #14: Systems of Safety

77. Sarah #14: Systems of Safety

We explore the "systems of safety" that Sarah developed as a child growing up in a cult to protect herself because no one else did. We can thank those defense mechanisms for doing such a good job of protecting us when a threat was real. We needed them to survive and now we need to say goodbye to them in order to thrive. Doug helps Sarah look deeper into those systems to see two sides of her - one that can be easy going and one that can be "mama bear," rigid, and take up a righteous quest for justice. The goal is not to keep the two sides separate, but rather to integrate them as pieces of the whole person she is and wants to become. Sarah is bringing awareness, understanding, and compassion to how she sees herself. Bonnie Rae joins Doug in the breakdown and they discuss OCPD (Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder) and how Sarah is processing her history of being wronged and abused by people in power (cult leader, boss, ex-husband).

The guest co-host:

Bonnie Rae psychotherapy

Doug Friedman

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Jaksot(159)

142. Drew #104-105: Drew Has a Baby and an Existential Crisis

142. Drew #104-105: Drew Has a Baby and an Existential Crisis

Kenzie is jacked up on caffeine and we're getting existential in this one. In the session, Drew emotionally retells the story of the birth of his child and the traumatic experience he went through in ...

20 Kesä 20241h

141. Sarah #45: Are Repressed Memories Real?

141. Sarah #45: Are Repressed Memories Real?

Doug and Kenzie discuss the hotly debated topic of whether or not repressed memories are real. In the session, Sarah revisits some traumatic memories of growing up in the cult. As she moves towards he...

13 Kesä 20241h 1min

140. Drew #103: Progress is (Like) a River Flowing Forward

140. Drew #103: Progress is (Like) a River Flowing Forward

Doug and Kenzie discuss the question of whether or not people can actually change. In Drew's session, his thoughts meander so Doug throws a few things out to see what sticks. They work through Drew's ...

6 Kesä 20241h 4min

139. Sarah #44: The New Badge of Honor

139. Sarah #44: The New Badge of Honor

Doug and Kenzie break down codependence and answer a listener question about having contact with your therapist outside of your regularly scheduled sessions. In Sarah's session, she processes some fam...

30 Touko 20241h 5min

138. Drew #102: I Don't Want to Become My Mom

138. Drew #102: I Don't Want to Become My Mom

Drew gives an update on his medical health and it leads to a discussion about parenting. He is worried about turning into his parents while he is preparing to become a parent himself. Doug explains ho...

23 Touko 20241h

137. Sarah #43: Eulogy for My Old Self and T-Shirt

137. Sarah #43: Eulogy for My Old Self and T-Shirt

Doug helps Sarah stay in the moment and allow emotions to come up. She acknowledges being more comfortable in constant motion and hypervigilance mode when she is more focused on "doing" rather than "f...

16 Touko 20241h 4min

136. Drew #101: It's All Life: Balancing Work, Rest, and Play

136. Drew #101: It's All Life: Balancing Work, Rest, and Play

Drew digs deeper into his core thought that his self-worth depends on how good of a provider he is to his family. Doug helps Drew explore taking care of himself in a healthy way rather than working so...

9 Touko 202458min

135. Sarah #42: Looking at Yourself with a Fun House Mirror Lens

135. Sarah #42: Looking at Yourself with a Fun House Mirror Lens

Sarah is interacting with the world around her slightly differently. Doug invites her to experiment with what it's like to be the observer, especially when interacting with her siblings. Sarah is shif...

2 Touko 202452min

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