159-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura

Ain't nothin in life free. P***y would be at the top of that list, especially for an ex-pat roided out Aussie pimp handling his Thai ho's. Make sense? Dude has some good points and a LOT of job stoppers (you'll soon understand). A man violated the safety and sanctity of our neighborhood in front of Tina and inTO a Yoplait (possible future sponsor?). We go to the Forensic Files to see if we can solve the case! Do families that masturbate together just, basically, get along the best? We just don't know. Tina left behind a life in the KGB to come to the US of A and today is the anniversary. Will she be allowed to stay? Obama decides! Wiping with a MAN'S wipe is new for Lady Jeans. We can't wait for her review. Most IMPORTANTLY we break down the new and accepted criteria for crowning the You Know What I'm Sayin Champion and it's a real GAME CHANGER. It's spring time, get that seasonal denim out!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 Huhti 20141h 18min

It never gets old. No matter how much time passes by, joy is always spread when someone drops a Deez Nuts joke. And if you get it on TV? Well, we collectively thank you, sir. New music from you, the little jeans, is welcomed and celebrated! It's time to post a challenge! Does a pimp or a rapper say You Know What Im Sayin more? Get out your pen and paper cause you've got some countin' to do! (You know what I'm sayin?) But everything takes a back seat to the Queen of this episode. Internet sensation, vocal inspiration and servant of our Lord, Aunty FeeFee joins us! She is as sweet, engaging and fun as you knew she would be. Does she bless our show with a special tune? Put your earbuds in and let us pleasure you ears. WE WEAR DENIM ONLY AROUND HERE! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

28 Maalis 20141h 18min

FART. That's one of many different noises you will hear on this episode. We really cover all the bases, YKWIS? Yes, there's a new champ in the You Know What I'm Sayin circle and it is GLORIOUS! Tina and Tommy both have Brown issues - You've been warned. Is or isn't the man we both see homeless? The Jeans are DIVIDED. Plus Jerry Lewis is still obnoxious and we have a first hand account from comedian and writer Megan Beth Koester (@bornferal). It's ridiculous and hilarious. Pull your pants up. BIKES!!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

26 Maalis 20141h 9min

Where Brooklyn at? In your ear drums. Rest In Peace, ODB. We pay respect to the GODS on this one. There's nothing quite like a LIVE Mom in front of other Mom's, knawmean? This is all the goodness of YMH wrapped into one Live Denim sandwich - we got crazy audio, WYR, Top Dog and more! Peace to Big Daddy Kane. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 Maalis 20141h 44min

Ari Shaffir AKA Airey Schaeffer is in the building. Sure he put some loose change we had lying around in his pocket, but we still enjoyed his company. Did you ever hear the joke that if we want to win a war we should just send gangbangers to fight them because they love shooting people anyway? Yeah, that's happening. Some OG Sorenos from the 818 are droppin dimes on fools in Syria and the audio is amazing. We have a MAJOR Dental Update - Tina had something SERIOUS done, jeans. Hear the wrath of Ari towards TSA and celebrate Tommy's new special and album. You know what we're sayin? Plus Ari's brown talk will have you cringing, possibly crying and certainly mailing him fiber bars.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

19 Maalis 20141h 10min

Are you thirsty? I bet after you hear this one you'll want nothing more than a big gulp from a nice German man's tough nips. We love you so much that we took what was to be the next BONUS episode and we gave it to you, the little Mommy. This show was the Dog's T**S and there are sex secrets revealed. What more could you want? Pull those jeans up. A little higher, please?  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

14 Maalis 20141h 31min

Who is the Main Mommy to you? For many, it's our disabled son, Redban. Luckily for you, he's in the Mommy Dome again and he's grosser than ever. It's always nice to have your kid come home from college and for this hour we wonder if he's ever going to class anymore. We cover life, teeth, Sharkeisha, paranoia and a whole lot more. Does Redban have a secret brother??? Maybe. Does a girl who sells you her dirty panties excite Brian? We think so. Does he tells us the grossest thing ever and nearly causes the show to stop? Yes. Classic Mom on this one.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Maalis 20141h 7min

You ain't even wash it???? You NASTY!!! Do ya thang, gurl! If I beat yo a** in a fight, then I do what I want when I win, ya dig? Do you know your weight class? Figure it out, farty weight!  Tommy had to go potty bad and it almost came out in the car! Tina laughed and that's not nice. Do you think that Robin Wright makes possible suitors sniff her snuff spot? Tommy thinks so. House of Cards (Farts) is the Dogs T**s! Talk smack when you get in a fight, but don't lose focus or your breath.  YMH introduces the world to A LOT of things, Knaw Mean? And HONESTLY, we've done it again. Mommy emails are read that deal with playing with the fart pitch and more! Pull those Jeans a little higher, won't you? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Maalis 201459min