The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’
The Daily9 Maalis

The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’

One thing I’ve learned from being married to my wife, Jess, who is a couples therapist, is how vast the distance is between the masks people show to the world and the messy realities that live behind them. Every couple knows its own drama, but we still fall prey to the illusion that all other couples have seamlessly satisfying relationships. The truth about marriage — including my own — is that even the most functional couples are merely doing the best they can with the lives that have been bestowed on them.

This past spring, Jess and I had the first of eight sessions of couples therapy with Terry Real, a best-selling author and by far the most famous of the therapists we’ve seen during our marriage. Real, whose admirers include Gwyneth Paltrow and Bruce Springsteen, is one of a small number of thinkers who are actively shaping how the couples-therapy field is received by the public and practiced by other therapists. He is also the bluntest and most charismatic of the therapists I’ve seen, the New Jersey Jewish version of Robin Williams’s irascible Boston character in “Good Will Hunting” — profane, charismatic, open about his own life, forged in his own story of pain.

Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

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Qatar Force One

Qatar Force One

President Trump is in the Middle East on the first major international trip of his second term. At the same time, a firestorm has erupted over his plan to accept a $400 million luxury airplane from the Qatari government.Today, Maggie Haberman, a White House correspondent, explains how the free plane may set a problematic precedent — and what Qatar might expect in return.Guest: Maggie Haberman, a White House correspondent for The New York Times.Background reading: Republicans on Capitol Hill seem unlikely to challenge President Trump, as he courts gifts and pushes guardrails.When pressed on the ethical implications of accepting a luxury jet, Mr. Trump said only someone “stupid” would turn down such an offer.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Haiyun Jiang for The New York Times Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

14 Touko 23min

The Secret Power of Siblings

The Secret Power of Siblings

Parents try everything to influence their children. But new research suggests that brothers and sisters have their own profound impact.Susan Dominus, a staff writer for The New York Times Magazine, discusses the surprising ways that our brothers and sisters shape our lives.Guest: Susan Dominus, a staff writer at The New York Times Magazine covering a broad range of topics. Her recent article was adapted from her book, “The Family Dynamic: A Journey Into the Mystery of Sibling Success,” which was published by Crown on May 6.Background reading: Read Susan’s article about the surprising ways that siblings shape our lives.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Artwork by Kensuke Koike Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

13 Touko 27min

A Vulnerable China Comes to the Table

A Vulnerable China Comes to the Table

Over the weekend, top negotiators from the U.S. and China met for the first time since President Trump rapidly escalated a trade war between the world’s two economic superpowers.Keith Bradsher, the Beijing bureau chief for The New York Times, discusses the pressures facing China, as it came to the negotiating table and why it so badly needs a deal.Guest: Keith Bradsher, the Beijing bureau chief for The New York TimesBackground reading: The U.S. said ‘substantial progress’ had been made in trade talks with China.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Agence France-Presse — Getty Images Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

12 Touko 31min

The Sunday Read: ‘My Miserable Week in the “Happiest Country on Earth’’’

The Sunday Read: ‘My Miserable Week in the “Happiest Country on Earth’’’

For eight years running, Finland has been rated the happiest country in the world by a peculiar United Nations-backed project called the World Happiness Report, started in 2012. Soon after Finland shot to the top of the list, its government set up a “happiness tourism” initiative, which now offers itineraries highlighting the cultural elements that ostensibly contribute to its status: foraging, fresh air, trees, lakes, sustainably produced meals and, perhaps above all else, saunas.Instead of adhering to one of these optimal itineraries or visiting Finland at the rosiest time of year (any time except the dead of winter), Molly Young arrived with few plans at all during one of the bleakest months. Would the happiest country on earth still be so mirthful at its gloomiest? Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

11 Touko 29min

'The Interview': Can Whitney Wolfe Herd Make Us Love Dating Apps Again?

'The Interview': Can Whitney Wolfe Herd Make Us Love Dating Apps Again?

The Bumble CEO has returned to run the struggling company she founded, and says she has a plan for getting Gen Z back. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

10 Touko 50min

An American Pope

An American Pope

The world’s 1.4 billion Catholics have a new pope, and for the first time, he is from America.Jason Horowitz, the Rome bureau chief of The New York Times, introduces us to Pope Leo XIV.Guest: Jason Horowitz, the Rome bureau chief of The New York TimesBackground reading: Who is Pope Leo XIV?The first American pope took a global route to the role.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Alkis Konstantinidis/Reuters Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

9 Touko 27min

A Frightening Moment to Fly

A Frightening Moment to Fly

A 90-second failure of Newark Airport’s air-traffic safety systems, which blacked out communication to planes carrying thousands of passengers, has exposed a new level of crisis in air travel.Kate Kelly, an investigative reporter for The New York Times, explains what the problems at one of the country’s biggest airports tell us about air-travel safety in the United States.Guest: Kate Kelly, an investigative reporter for The New York Times based in Washington, D.C.Background reading: How lost radar and silent radios upended Newark air travel.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Dakota Santiago for The New York Times Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

8 Touko 31min

What Warren Buffett Understood About Capitalism

What Warren Buffett Understood About Capitalism

A few days ago, Warren Buffett, the most successful investor in history, said he would retire as C.E.O. of Berkshire Hathaway, the conglomerate that he built into a trillion-dollar colossus.Andrew Ross Sorkin, who has covered Mr. Buffett for many years, discusses the career of the man who both personified and critiqued American capitalism.Guest: Andrew Ross Sorkin, a columnist and the founder and editor-at-large of DealBook.Background reading: Warren Buffett said he plans to step down as head of Berkshire Hathaway.Here’s what Mr. Buffett’s exit means.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Scott Morgan/Reuters Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

7 Touko 27min

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