The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’
The Daily9 Maalis

The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’

One thing I’ve learned from being married to my wife, Jess, who is a couples therapist, is how vast the distance is between the masks people show to the world and the messy realities that live behind them. Every couple knows its own drama, but we still fall prey to the illusion that all other couples have seamlessly satisfying relationships. The truth about marriage — including my own — is that even the most functional couples are merely doing the best they can with the lives that have been bestowed on them.

This past spring, Jess and I had the first of eight sessions of couples therapy with Terry Real, a best-selling author and by far the most famous of the therapists we’ve seen during our marriage. Real, whose admirers include Gwyneth Paltrow and Bruce Springsteen, is one of a small number of thinkers who are actively shaping how the couples-therapy field is received by the public and practiced by other therapists. He is also the bluntest and most charismatic of the therapists I’ve seen, the New Jersey Jewish version of Robin Williams’s irascible Boston character in “Good Will Hunting” — profane, charismatic, open about his own life, forged in his own story of pain.

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“Charm City,” Part 5: What’s Behind the Black Box?

“Charm City,” Part 5: What’s Behind the Black Box?

The relatives of a Baltimore teenager think they know the name of the police officer who killed him. But when the police show his mother the surveillance video that captured his final moments, a new story emerges. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily.This episode includes disturbing language and scenes of graphic violence. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

8 Kesä 20181h 5min

“Charm City,” Part 4: The Police Scandal That Shook Baltimore

“Charm City,” Part 4: The Police Scandal That Shook Baltimore

As the Baltimore Police Department tried to repair its public image, a corruption trial exposed the startling depths of misconduct and delivered a fresh blow to the community’s trust. An elite group of officers — part of a task force created during the peak of zero-tolerance policing — had been stealing from residents for years. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily.This episode includes disturbing language and scenes of graphic violence. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

7 Kesä 201841min

“Charm City,” Part 3: The Lure of the Streets

“Charm City,” Part 3: The Lure of the Streets

Nook spent the first few years of his life in an affluent suburb, a world away from the streets of Baltimore. But the city drew him back, and he and his friends became part of a generation caught between the crack epidemic that consumed their neighborhoods and the aggressive police tactics meant to fix the problem. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. This episode includes disturbing language and scenes of graphic violence. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

6 Kesä 201842min

“Charm City,” Part 2: The Legacy of Zero-Tolerance Policing

“Charm City,” Part 2: The Legacy of Zero-Tolerance Policing

Relations between the police and the community in Baltimore weren’t always so troubled. But as job loss and drugs tore through the city, the policing idea of so-called zero tolerance, transplanted from New York City, created a generation of young men with criminal records. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily.This episode includes disturbing language and scenes of graphic violence. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

5 Kesä 201845min

“Charm City,” Part 1: Baltimore After Freddie Gray

“Charm City,” Part 1: Baltimore After Freddie Gray

“The Daily” presents a five-part series about the life and death of a Baltimore teenager known as Nook, who was fatally shot by a police officer a year after the killing of Freddie Gray. Nook’s family is searching for truth from the streets where he died, the police who took his life and the city that won’t give them answers. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily.This episode includes disturbing language and scenes of graphic violence. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

4 Kesä 201845min

The Daily Presents “Caliphate,” Chapter 7

The Daily Presents “Caliphate,” Chapter 7

The New York Times has introduced a documentary audio series that follows Rukmini Callimachi, who covers terrorism for The Times, on her quest to understand ISIS. Today, as a special episode of “The Daily,” we offer Chapter 7 of “Caliphate,” in which Rukmini examines what ISIS left behind as their hold on Mosul crumbled. For more information about the series, visit nytimes.com/caliphate.This episode includes disturbing language and scenes of graphic violence. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

2 Kesä 201835min

When Democratic Newcomers Challenge the Party Line

When Democratic Newcomers Challenge the Party Line

Alarm over the election of Donald Trump spurred dozens of first-time candidates to run for Congress. Some of those candidates now present a problem for the Democratic Party. Guests: Mai Khanh Tran, a Democratic candidate running for the United States House in California; Alexander Burns, who covers national politics for The New York Times. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

1 Kesä 201825min

The Truth Behind #WhereAreTheChildren

The Truth Behind #WhereAreTheChildren

The United States government lost track of nearly 1,500 undocumented children in the last three months of 2017, giving rise to claims that they had been separated from their families at the border. What does the confusion reveal about President Trump’s approach to immigration? Guest: Caitlin Dickerson, a national immigration reporter for The New York Times. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

31 Touko 201820min

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