191: When His Sexual Desire Goes Down as He Becomes Free From Pornography (and tools to rebuild your sexual relationship)

191: When His Sexual Desire Goes Down as He Becomes Free From Pornography (and tools to rebuild your sexual relationship)

Today we're talking about something couples rarely discuss: when a husband's interest in sex drops after he stops using porn.

For wives, this can feel very confusing and hurtful. After working hard to heal the relationship, it's painful when intimacy doesn't return as expected. She might wonder, "Doesn't he find me attractive? Is he really getting better?"

But lower sexual desire after recovery isn't always a bad sign. It's often part of a necessary reset in understanding healthy intimacy.

The drive for sex that was powered by fantasy starts to quiet down, creating space for real connection to grow.

Today I'll share five reasons why desire decreases during recovery and how couples can build a fulfilling sex life based on both people's needs, emotional safety, and genuine connection.

For therapy with Sam:

I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and resolve the root cause so it doesn't come back.

If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully overcome it, I’ll work with you for free until you do.

Click here for info to work with me directly.

Have questions you want me to address on future podcast episodes?

Email me here:

sam@healingcouples.org

Get access to my trust building workshop:

Rebuild Trust Workshop

Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners?

Click the Couples Healing website and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.

Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction.

Jaksot(240)

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What Does a Neuroscientist Report about Pornography and the Brain? (No Judgement)

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So often a wife will wonder if her husband would have ever changed and stopped watching pornography if she didn’t catch him. Most of the time the husband starts taking real action after he’s found out...

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Triggers and urges for pornography can be completely overwhelming for husbands who are on this journey. There is often a real struggle when the thought to act out surfaces, despite their desire to avo...

6 Loka 202220min

When He Can’t Answer Her Question ‘Why Did You Do This?’

When He Can’t Answer Her Question ‘Why Did You Do This?’

When there has been betrayal due to a pornography addiction, a woman will often ask her husband why he did, how he could have hurt her like that, why didn’t he consider her or the family, etc. There’s...

29 Syys 202220min

She Said He Knew Pornography Hurts Her But Did It Anyways

She Said He Knew Pornography Hurts Her But Did It Anyways

So often a wife will have a conversation with her husband about how much pain his watching pornography causes her. he said is that he will stop the behavior, but then months or years later it’s discov...

22 Syys 202227min

What Happens if a Wife Becomes ’Addicted’ to the Trauma of Betrayal, and How You Can Move Forward - Part 2 with Jolene Wynn

What Happens if a Wife Becomes ’Addicted’ to the Trauma of Betrayal, and How You Can Move Forward - Part 2 with Jolene Wynn

After there’s been betrayal due to a pornography addiction, it can be very difficult to feel secure and safe in the relationship. And a lot of women find themselves feeling stuck and can’t get out of ...

29 Elo 202238min

When a Husband Gets Better and His Wife Gets Worst - Part 1 with Jolene Wynn

When a Husband Gets Better and His Wife Gets Worst - Part 1 with Jolene Wynn

When people are trying to overcome the impact that pornography addiction has in their marriage, there are 3 separate (and overlapping) aspects to healing - his healing, hers, and the relationship. Man...

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