792: Psychologist and New York Times Best-Selling Author on the Discipline of Letting Go

792: Psychologist and New York Times Best-Selling Author on the Discipline of Letting Go

In this reflective conversation, psychologist and author Dr. Bob Rosen examines the unspoken attachments that often shape executive behavior, frequently without conscious awareness. His framework, drawn from decades of work with leaders navigating volatility and pressure, identifies recurring psychological patterns that can impair decision-making, reduce well-being, and diminish long-term effectiveness.

Rosen outlines the dominant attachments that affect leadership behavior, each is rooted in fear, and each manifests in distinct and sometimes destructive ways. The discussion offers five key insights for senior professionals:

  1. Attachment to Success Can Drive Burnout, Not Fulfillment. When external validation becomes the metric for self-worth, leaders risk defining their identity by performance alone. As Rosen notes, “Who you are drives what you do, not what you do defines who you are.” The antidote, he argues, is cultivating an internal orientation of abundance, recognizing that self-worth is not conditional.
  2. Unexamined Attachments Are Often Reinforced by Organizational Systems. Rosen points out that performance-based compensation and cultural norms can unintentionally reward self-absorption or control-seeking behavior in leaders, thereby entrenching these attachments further. Shifting these dynamics requires institutional as well as personal change.
  3. Emotional Maturity Is Measured by the Capacity to Sit with Discomfort. Many attachments serve to mask fear—through overwork, consumerism, perfectionism, or self-isolation. Leaders must develop the capacity to experience discomfort without anesthetizing it through compulsive behavior, a discipline Rosen describes as essential to long-term growth.
  4. Aging Offers Strategic and Personal Opportunity, If Leaders Reframe It. Rosen challenges internalized ageism and presents aging as a stage of potential, not decline. He advocates for embracing imperfection, accepting physical limits, and consciously transitioning into roles of service, wisdom-sharing, and inner peace. “You choose,” he states, “to walk a path of regret or a path of gratitude.”
  5. Self-Awareness Is a Precondition for Organizational Leadership. Rosen recommends a structured four-part process for identifying and softening attachments: awareness and acceptance, diagnosis of the underlying fear, vision of an aspirational alternative, and aligned daily action. This framework, he notes, should be viewed not as a retreat from strategy, but as a foundation for sustaining it.

The episode ultimately frames leadership not as a mastery of tasks, but as a form of inner clarity that shapes every external result. For executives in fast-moving environments, this conversation provides a disciplined yet humane approach to personal development, grounded in realism, not rhetoric.

Learn more about Bob Rosen here: https://www.bobrosen.com/

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Jaksot(801)

17: Arithmetic skills actually needed for cases

17: Arithmetic skills actually needed for cases

We were forced to prepare this podcast after realizing how poorly candidates prepare for the arithmetic rigor they need to display. For some reason candidates believe practicing hundreds of math problems make them better at math. This is not how to learn math in cases. This podcast gives you proper guidance on learning arithmetic for cases, and how to communicate this competency.

21 Kesä 201112min

16: Advising a McKinsey Consultant

16: Advising a McKinsey Consultant

On Monday this week, we had an early lunch at Crush restaurant at King West in Toronto. We wanted to advise a recently placed McKinsey associate who was struggling to make the transition. The challenges he faced provide an interesting perspective on what skills you will need as a consultant, and related to this, what you need to show in an interview.

15 Kesä 201117min

15: Importance of Confidence in Cases

15: Importance of Confidence in Cases

We would say 90% of candidates with whom we speak do not understand what is confidence, how to build it and how to demonstrate it. We will talk about experiences we have had with candidates with weak confidence levels and what you need to consider when preparing for your own interviews.

9 Kesä 201110min

14: Did you pay $150K for a McKinsey interview

14: Did you pay $150K for a McKinsey interview

MBA programs want you to believe that joining a school like Stanford, Harvard etc in the MBA program will dramatically improve your chances of success. It will not and that is a huge myth.

3 Kesä 201112min

13: Consulting Culture

13: Consulting Culture

This is a topic which is very dear and close to me. In fact, it is why we started Firmsconsulting and run it the way we do. Very, very few people truly understand the culture of management consulting. Many existing consultants also struggle to understand the culture. Consultants are professionals, not business people. I would strongly urge you to listen to this podcast.

28 Touko 201124min

12: McKinsey, BCG etc. exit opportunities exaggerated

12: McKinsey, BCG etc. exit opportunities exaggerated

This is an important podcast because it explains how a consulting career should fit into your overall career planning. Most candidates want to work at BBM because everyone says they should. They also think they know the exit opportunities but have a very weak, and sometimes fantasized, view on exit options.

22 Touko 201114min

11: Fatal brainstorming mistake made by all

11: Fatal brainstorming mistake made by all

You are unlikely to pass a McKinsey case interview unless you can brainstorm. Consulting interviewers are ALWAYS testing for poise, confidence, structure and logic in your response. Most candidates do this well everywhere – except when it comes to brainstorming. Learn how “not” to brainstorm. This podcast looks at one of the most common brainstorming problems. A problem so common, that many simply assume it is the way to brainstorm. Fixing this problem can improve your brainstorming skills by between 5% to 30% percent.

16 Touko 20118min

10: The Strategy Study

10: The Strategy Study

McKinsey, BCG et al engagements are very different from the stories typically depicted on blogs etc. Too often the writer seems intent on explain how long the hours are and the need to do analyses. That is part of the picture but far from the entire story. Many of these stories are also written bottom-up with an associate or analyst seeing things from their relatively narrow view without a proper feel for the higher level discussions.

10 Touko 201116min

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