Why Does Desire Change & When Was The Last Time You Felt Pleasure? Uncut with Dr Jenn Gunsaullus

Welcome back to ask uncut where we unpack all of your deep and burning questions. Britt has an aeroplane/travel dilemma of her own - who owns the space UNDER the seat? Is it the person whose designated seat it is? Or is it the person behind whose legs go underneath? Vibes for the week: Britt - __mrsinthemaking Bridal & Hens Personalised Jewellery Keeshia - Great Company with Jamie Laing Podcast - Spencer Matthews Our First Honest Conversation About Our Friendship Then we get into your questions! ARE TOPLESS WAITRESSES NORMAL?I recently found out that my husband and his mates sometimes ‘order’ topless waiters during their Saturday night drinks. He says it’s only happened 2–3 times over our 6 years together, but I can’t help feeling like it’s a bit sleezy and icky. He never mentioned it to me before, and I only found out after poking and prodding when I could tell he was hiding something on the weekend. He insists it’s never his idea and that he just goes along with the group. It’s usually 4–5 friends, none of whom have wives or kids at home (unlike us), and I guess I’m wondering… am I overreacting for feeling put off by this? Would this bother anyone else, or is it something I should just let slide MY FIL IS A PIG BUT ALSO HELPS ME OUTAm I justified in being frustrated with my filthy father in law, or is it the price I have to pay for a reliable pet sitter? For context, my partner and I have been together for 10 years and are in our late 20’s. My partner’s father is much older, aged in his 70’s, and will pet-sit for 2-3 weeks when we go overseas for an annual holiday. He is always very willing to house sit as he loves the fur-babies, and he lives by himself in a caravan park, so he enjoys the space and company. We of course give him a bit of cash (usually $50-100) to use towards take out. Now here is my dilemma. Every time we return home from a holiday, I am extremely frustrated with the lack of cleaning and things I find around the house that give me the ick. Certain things are probably outside my FIL’s control - like his dandruff skin flakes all over the couch. However, there’s things that have frustrated me and I can’t tell if I’m being unreasonable. Examples include: Tobacco flakes spilt on the floor and kitchen bench. - Food spillage on the kitchen floor and down the cupboard doors. - Putting dirty greasy Tupperware away because he refuses to use the dishwasher. Drapping his wet bath towel on the bed instead of 1 of the 3 towel racks in the bathroom. - And here is my main cleaning frustration. My FIL has a stoma bag (which I of course am not judging him for) and he obviously has to empty it. However, on multiple occasions, including most recently, we’ve come home to find a little bit of shit splattered on the toilet seat or even dripping down the bowl onto the floor. My partner will always clean up the toilet because I’m disgusted, but I also don’t think it’s my partner's responsibility to clean up after his dad when he is still mobile and capable. I have tried to say things as they arise, for example, asking my FIL not to smoke directly next to the clean laundry outside. However, I don’t feel like I should have to say this to a grown man. I am trying to see the other side of it, including the fact that he lives alone, so maybe my FIL doesn’t realise how messy he can be. However, I would be mortified if I house-sat for someone and left shit on their toilet for them to clean when they got home. My partner it’s not confrontational and does not want to embarrass his father, but I think his father is a grown man and should have more respect for our home and cleaning up after himself, even if he is doing us a favour by looking after the pets. So - should my partner and I say something to him? Or do I just suck it up, bite my tongue and clean up when we return home from a trip? IS EVERYONE A LITTLE UNHAPPY IN LOVE?Is everyone struggling just a little bit in their relationship or is it just me?!? Lifers I need help. I love my partner, we have been together for 5 years and he is exactly what I was looking for in a lot of ways. He’s thoughtful, emotionally available, loyal, affectionate, hard working, funny and just generally a good partner. And although most of the time I truly feel he is my penguin. There are also times where I completely question it all, lately a lot more. I sometimes feel he’s a bit immature, with his favorite activity still getting drunk most weekends with “the boys”. He’s not very present (completely hooked on his phone) and is very snappy/impatient. And sometimes these traits really make me question it all. Do we want the same things (I rarely drink)? Do I want kids with someone who is so snappy and impatient? Anyways, I’m worried i’m just striving for a perfection that doesn’t exist, that i’ll always feel the grass is greener and I need to stop being so critical. So my question is, are most couples just slightly unhappy? Do we all question our relationships from time to time and just not talk about it? I feel like most couples I know are all struggling with something, but i’m not sure if that’s how it usually is/or if it’s just my circle HUSBAND WANTS TO ‘WET THE BABY’S HEAD’ AND I THINK IT”S UNFAIR AND JUST A PISSUPI want to know your ladies thoughts on a ‘wet the head’? For context, my husband and I are expecting a baby in April next year. We aren’t the first in our friendship group to have a baby, so therefore my husband has been to a few wet the head celebrations before. Here’s the kicker; it always turns into a huge piss up. I’m talking bulk beers and hours at the pub while the new mother is at home alone in the absolute trenches of having a new born baby and navigating postpartum hormones. My husband was talking about his ‘wet the head’ a few days ago when I mentioned I wasn’t keen on the idea. He was quite upset by this when I stated that I don’t understand why the men would get a celebration after childbirth when respectfully they’ve done nothing I understand their excitement around having a new born baby and them having a proud dad moment, but wouldn’t it be better received if they were at home being a supportive father/husband. What are your thoughts? You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

12 Loka 202554min

It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP. You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

11 Loka 202543min

Why do we want to hurt the people that hurt us?Over the years we have spoken about so many different aspects of relationships but today’s topic is one we have never fully unpacked before and it’s one of the most destructive forces in relationships: revenge. We don’t always call it that in romantic relationships, but when couples fall into patterns of "getting back at each other", keeping score, or holding long grievances, they’re often trapped in what’s called a “revenge loop;” one that science now shows is addictive and deeply damaging. Today’s guest is James Kimmel. James is a lawyer, Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the Yale School of Medicine and the author of The Science of Revenge. James has done a huge amount of research into how revenge quietly simmers inside all of us and how revenge triggers the brain’s reward system, much like a drug, and some of us might be revenge addicts without even knowing it. Today we chat: James wanting to get revenge on the teenage boys who killed his dog The neuroscience of revenge & how it can be addictive Could this ever be used as a ‘defence’ in court? Why we want the people who hurt us to hurt Justice v revenge How Hollywood has relied on revenge plot narratives How women and men experience empathy differently How forgiveness can rewire our brains You can find more from James Kimmel at his website You can get a copy of The Science of Revenge You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

9 Loka 202554min

Hey lifers!Poppy has popped out! She’s just the cutest! Next week we will have an episode with Laura about Poppy’s birth. Britt is always *rooting for long distance relationships. She’s been over to see Ben in Italy and been reminded that she found herself a bit of a chefing unicorn! She’s also made a friend over in Italy despite one big difference between them. Do you have a friend who looks really put together and tidy on the outside of their home, but on the inside it’s a complete mess? That’s our girl Britt and she’s got a new air fryer hack for you. Keeshia was given 3 minutes to talk about the rugby league grand final and she’s calling BS on some of the headlines that are always printed after any grand final entertainment performance. Do you think having big international acts like Teddy Swims and Snoop Dog is a good thing or should we only feature Aussie artists? There are 5 new dating trends predicted for 2026: ChemRIZZtry Curveball-crushing Love-loreing Truecasting StAtuS-flexing We also share a story that we’ve kept private for 4 years about the very worst guy Keeshia ever dated. Hopefully she is alone in this experience. Victoria Beckham posted a photo from her Paris Fashion show that led to people questioning whether her 20 year old son’s relationship with a 29 year old woman was ‘weird’. We speak about whether the ‘issue’ is actually a timeline gap and if our views on age gaps are class coded. We also chat about which attachment styles are more likely to end up in age gap relationships and why society seems to freak out when a woman is the older partner. You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

7 Loka 20251h

Welcome back to ask uncut where we unpack your deep and burning questions! Britt has been in Italy and Laura has had a baby! If you found out the gender of your baby when you were pregnant, was it correct? Google AI says it’s wrong in Australia about 5% of the time. We’d love to know if yours wasn’t right!Apparently if you’re really into true crime, you need to evaluate ‘why trauma feels comforting to you’. Britt feels a little attacked by this info and she also thinks it doesn’t make sense. Vibes for the week:Britt - Dexter Original Sin Keeshia - KW ceramics reusable cup Then we get into your questions! FRIEND HAS ACCESS TO HER EX HUSBANDS EMAIL AND I THINK ITS UNETHICALI’ve just found out my good friend has access to her ex-husbands emails. She recently told me she saw something in his emails. It was a fleeting comment and I didn’t think much of it until I realised how unethical and inappropriate it is. They got divorced 2-3 years ago and it was quite toxic and their relationship is still very toxic. I’m really close with both of them, I don’t want to ruin our friendship by telling him but I think it’s extremely inappropriate and potentially illegal that she has access to his emails. I have no idea how to approach the situation. Please help. MUM WON’T GET WHOOPING VAX FOR MY NEW BABYHi ladies, OG listener here. I’m stuck in a pickle. I’m 17 weeks pregnant. Here’s where I’m stuck - during COVID my mum became really anti-vax. She was never like this previously, my siblings and I got all our childhood vaccinations. I work in healthcare and always get flu shots, got my COVID boosters etc. I’m really nervous about asking her to get vaccinated for whooping cough before the baby comes. Originally she only cared about the Covid vax but since has gone down a lot of conspiracy rabbit holes in regards to healthcare in general and I’ve heard her make comments about other vaccines. I admit no one will be holding or touching my baby without one and I know my partner and his family would back me up on this. How would you approach this conversation? She is known to be rather reactive so I don’t want to make a drama out of it, rather approach it gently. DO I DELETE PICS OF EX FROM IG BEFORE NEW PARTNERS FOLLOW ME?Should I delete photos with my ex on Instagram before I let the new people I date follow me? I broke up with my ex 3 months ago, and I have one in-feed picture of him and I sitting on a boat (not super coupley but coupley enough) I love the photo - I am so happy in that photo, and nothing bad happened between me and my ex. The photo was from late last year. I am not sure to remove it in case it makes my (potential) future partners uncomfortable? I wouldn’t care if they had a photo of their ex on their Insta. Not sure what to do here (and neither do my friends!) FOUND OUT MY SISTER CHEATED ON HER HUSBAND AND NOW I SEE HER DIFFERENTLYI recently found out that my sister cheated on my brother-in-law last year. We’re a very close family—it’s just the two of us, and our kids and partners are all really connected. I knew about the man she had been flirting with and often warned her, reminding her of how good her husband is and encouraging her to work on her marriage if things weren’t going well. Now that I know she went through with it, I feel devastated. Her husband knows and, while deeply hurt, he wants to try and work things out. For me, loyalty, trust, and respect are core values, and I feel like she has not only let her husband and kids down but also me and everyone close to her. She struggles with mental health and was drinking a lot at the time, but I still feel conflicted. I can’t help but see her differently now, and I feel hurt that she could lie about it for so long while looking us in the eye. How can I move forward from this? What can I say to her to express how upset and disappointed I am, without damaging our bond forever? You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

5 Loka 202546min

Today’s guest is a special repeat offender to life uncut! She first joined the podcast back in 2021 and has also been a special guest at 2 of our live shows. There are only a few people that we refer to with the description of ‘human sunshine’ but Em Carey is absolutely one of them! You can listen to Em’s episode from 2021 here. Em Carey is a survivor of a 2013 skydiving accident in Switzerland, which resulted in a paraplegic spinal cord injury, leaving her with no feeling from the waist down. She is now a bestselling author of The Girl Who Fell from the Sky, a keynote speaker, an artist and potentially a future marathon athlete!A lot has happened in Em’s life since we last spoke publicly. Some of what Em has been up to has been shared on social media but a lot of it hasn’t. Em has, in her own words, clocked off from social media in the last two years and so today we wanted to speak with her about why she decided to enter herself into the New York Marathon, an uncommon form of parental estrangement, dating with a disability and finding an identity outside of being the girl who fell from the sky. In today’s episode we speak about: Why Em feels so detached from being the ‘girl who fell from the sky’ The guy who dumped Em ‘because she had a disability’ Em’s dad cutting her off the same week that her book came out Struggling with strangers loving and admiring her when her own parent didn’t want anything to do with her Most estrangement is adult child cutting off parent, but Em’s situation is the reverse Why Em lost her confidence and turned away from public life Why she chose to attempt a marathon when she can’t physically run Em’s ambitious goal of raising $100k for “Who” Em is now in her 30s and her identity feeling different You can follow Em on Instagram You can find more from her website You can donate to the Perry Cross foundation You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

2 Loka 202557min

Hey Lifers! You’re with Britt and Keeshia today because Laura has officially had her little Poppy! We’ll be bringing you an episode all about Poppy’s birth soon! Britt has been reunited with Ben and is back to enjoying marital life. Britt has been seesawing on the decision of whether to have kids or not for a while now, and this experience with breast milk has surprisingly not brought her any closer to the decision. Did you/do you feel an intense ‘maternal pull’ or are you still ‘waiting’ for it to ‘kick in’? Do you have ROMO (relief of missing out)? Or is there a part of you that misses some of the chaos that used to be in your life? We speak about Cillian Murphy’s new ROMO phase and how our new joy in life comes from high pressure hoses. There’s a new reality TV show where “true crime meets true love and judgement meets redemption.” We speak about whether we’ve gone too far with reality TV. Would you date someone with a criminal record? Would it depend on what the record was for? We unpack a video posted by Emma Paige; “your toxic traits are the opposite of your love languages.”It seems to check out in our lives! We also speak about a substack written by Lauren Talulah titled What The Cool Girls Are Quietly Doing Right Now . There seems to be a shift in the way people are showing up online especially with LinkedIn, wearing outfits that don’t try to be flattering, romanticising platonic dependence and posting much less. Have you felt a shift in what is “cool” online? You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! Xx See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

30 Syys 202556min

Welcome back to ask uncut where we answer your deep and burning questions. Laura may or may not have her 3rd child by now so we recorded this a bit in advance!Do you have a ‘legacy contact’ (the person assigned to access your phone if you were to pass away)? Would you make your legacy contact your partner or are you trusting a best friend/sibling to scrub that thing clean of anything you don’t want anyone seeing? Vibes for the week:Britt - Egg in the air fryer for 8-10 minsKeeshia - Tapo TP-Link Smart Security Wi-Fi Camera Then we jump into your questions! IS IT WEIRD TO ADD A FRIENDS BF ON IGI'm in a new relationship and I have never been in one before so I'm trying to understand what is normal and what isn't. I've known this guy for 2 months. My friend wanted to see me, and I asked if this new guy could join and she said yes. We hung out for a couple of hours that day. This was a month ago, fast track to now and she's just added him to Instagram. My new bf is very transparent and said he's not accepting her. After a few hours of him not accepting, I then got a message from her saying he came up on her ‘suggested’. Her one and only photo on Instagram is quite provocative. She's a friend I trust, but I just thought this was a bit odd as I've never added my friends bfs on Instagram. Most of my friends think it's weird, but one of them and ChatGTP seem to think it's showing signs of just friendliness. I'm also on my period, I just need help to know if this is normal CAN I ASK A HOOKUP TO PUT DEODORANT ON?I recently went out for drinks with a distant work colleague who was tall, scruffy with a beard and overall very attractive. He was an amazing kisser and things got hot and heavy quickly. We went back to his hotel room and when he took off his clothes, I noticed he had a strong BO smell. I’m very sensitive to smells and would have liked to ask him to put deodorant on but it would have killed the mood. I ended up not saying anything but if this situation were to come up again, what is the protocol here? Is it inappropriate to ask a man to put some deodorant on? Or do women usually just put up with this? IS PAYING SOMEONE FOR SEX BETTER THAN BEING CHEATED ON?I’m at a bit of a loss. My partner told me tonight that he has paid someone to have sex with him three times and to make matters worse, he thinks he may have caught something… he reckons the chick took the condom off and was really kissing him. (Writing this makes me feel like I’m going to be physically sick). I really didn’t think that he would ever do something like this to me and I just feel numb, I feel disgusting. We have been together for almost 7 years, we have a daughter who is almost two, I work full time, help him run his business as well as all the house stuff. I don’t mind doing all of this stuff as I want the business to be successful and I support him both best I can emotionally and financially. I’m always up for having sex with him and usually I’m the one who initiates it. I’m just curious on your thoughts, is this still betrayal. SHOULD I TELL MY PARTNER HIS SISTER IS GETTING AN ABORTION?My longterm partner has a sister who I am quite close to. She has revealed to me that she is pregnant and is getting an abortion next week. She does not want her parents to know. This feels like a pretty big thing to keep from my partner. I know he would not tell his parents, should I tell him? UPDATE: I spoke to her about the awkward position I am in and she said if I tell him she will not trust me again. But I think my partner’s trust is more important to me. I feel so torn. There is a chance he will never know about it anyway but what if he finds out and what if he finds out I knew all along? You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! XxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

28 Syys 202543min