Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson30 Kesä 2025

Why Modern Life Doesn't Make Us Happy, and How to Fix It with Dr. William von Hippel

Life today is safer and more comfortable than ever before, so why do so many people feel unhappy, lonely, and anxious? Forrest talks with evolutionary psychologist Dr. William von Hippel about this paradox in light of our two core needs: autonomy and connection. He argues that modern life has pushed us too far in the direction of autonomy, and that we need to reclaim connection in order to find happiness. They discuss how our evolutionary past shaped our needs for autonomy and connection, the tension between them, and why social connection matters so much for our well-being. They also touch on gender and cultural differences, common misunderstandings about evolutionary psychology, and what people can do to create more balanced and connected lives today. About our Guest: Dr. William von Hippel is an evolutionary psychologist and former professor at the University of Queensland. He has authored over 150 scientific publications including his books The Social Leap and The Social Paradox. Key Topics: 0:00: Why hasn’t modern life made us happier? 3:20: The evolution of autonomy and connection 10:15: How modern life favors autonomy over connection 18:10: “Sad success stories,” and the cost of competence 20:00: Competence vs warmth as social signals 26:00: Evolutionary mismatch, and its impact on well-being 29:00: How to understand evolutionary psychology 34:00: Evolved gender differences in autonomy and connection 42:00: Balancing sociocultural and evolutionary differences 49:00: What do those gender differences look like in practice? 55:50: Finding a healthy balance between autonomy and connection 1:08:55: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors For a limited time, get Headspace FREE for 60 days. Go to Headspace.com/BEINGWELL60. Go to Quince.com/BEINGWELL for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. Head to acornsearly.com/beingwell or download the Acorns Early app to help your kids grow their money skills today. Get Notion Mail for free right now at notion.com/beingwell, and try the inbox that thinks like you Go to Zocdoc.com/BEING to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell. Go to ZOE.com and find out what ZOE Membership could do for you. Use code WELL10 to get 10% off membership. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Understanding Dissociation and DID: What It's Really Like, and How People Recover w/ Dr. Milissa Kaufman and Dr. Lauren Lebois

Most of what people know about Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) comes from movies and short videos, and those media portrayals often have little to do with what DID is actually like. To get the re...

13 Heinä 1h 26min

From Insight to Action: How to Face the Fear You Keep Avoiding

Dr. Rick and Forrest continue last week’s conversation on avoidance coping, this time focusing on how to move from insight into meaningful action. They explore why self-awareness often isn’t enough to...

6 Heinä 1h 15min

Breaking the Avoidance Loop: Why You Keep Repeating the Same Patterns

We all have patterns we can see clearly…and still can't seem to stop. Dr. Rick and Forrest explore how avoidance fuels these patterns, and how we can break the avoidance loop by updating our expectati...

29 Kesä 1h 7min

The Secret to Happiness: How to Feel Loved with Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky

Forrest is joined by one of the world's leading happiness researchers, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, to discuss the real secret to happiness: feeling loved. Dr. Lyubomirsky explains the key difference betwee...

22 Kesä 1h 14min

How to Repair: The Key to Successful Relationships

Last week, Dr. Rick and Forrest discussed why healthy conflict is a vital part of strong and intimate relationships. Today, they focus on the how-to of effective repair: what it looks like, why it’s s...

15 Kesä 1h 24min

Healthy Conflict: The Most Important Relationship Skill We Don’t Learn

Most of us are pretty bad at conflict, usually because we weren’t taught how to handle it well. But healthy conflict can be one of the best ways to deepen intimacy and trust. In this episode Dr. Rick ...

8 Kesä 1h 4min

The Gut-Brain Connection: Anxiety, Depression, and Wellness Fads with Dr. Trisha Pasricha

Forrest is joined by neurogastroenterologist Dr. Trisha Pasricha for a conversation about the gut-brain connection, including how gut health impacts our mood and mental health. Dr. Pasricha explains h...

1 Kesä 1h 4min

Right Effort: When to Push and When to Let Go with Yung Pueblo

Forrest is joined by author, meditator, and friend Diego Perez, also known as Yung Pueblo, for a conversation about right effort, the balance between pushing through and letting go, and the death of n...

25 Touko 1h 2min