My Parents Left Me Alone to Forage and Survive on Angeles Mountains

My Parents Left Me Alone to Forage and Survive on Angeles Mountains

As a child, Michelle Dowd grew up on a mountain in the Angeles National Forest. She was born into an ultra-religious cult—or the Field as they called it—started in the 1930s by her grandfather, a mercurial, domineering, and charismatic man who convinced generations of young male followers that he would live 500 years and ascend to the heavens when doomsday came. Comfort and care are sins, Michelle is told. As a result, she was forced to learn the skills necessary to battle hunger, thirst, and cold; she learned to trust animals more than humans; and most importantly, she learned how to survive in the natural world.

At the Field, a young Michelle lives a life of abuse, poverty, and isolation, as she obeys her family’s rigorous religious and patriarchal rules—which are so extreme that Michelle is convinced her mother would sacrifice her, like Abraham and Isaac, if instructed by God. She often wears the same clothes for months at a time; she is often ill and always hungry for both love and food. She is taught not to trust Outsiders, and especially not Quitters, nor her own body and its warnings.

But as Michelle gets older, she realizes she has the strength to break free. Focus on what will sustain, not satiate you, she tells herself. Use everything. Waste nothing. Get to know the intricacies of the land, like the intricacies of your body. And so she does.

Using stories of individual edible plants and their uses to anchor each chapter, Forager is both a searing coming-of-age story and a meditation on the ways in which understanding nature can lead to freedom, even joy.

Click here to watch on YouTube

Find Michelle:

Subscribe to Substack

Pick up a copy of Forager: Field Notes for Surviving a Family Cult

IG: @michelledowdz

https://www.michelledowd.org/

We want to meet you in real life! Come adventure with us on our 2nd C2C VACATION! Click here to go to the official booking page

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Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.

Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousness

Venmo @sheliseann

Find us on Social media!

Instagram @cultstoconsciousness

Host Instagram @sheliseann

Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_

TikTok @cults.to.consciousness

Twitter @cultstocon

**Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**

Chapter Marks

00:00:00 Intro

00:04:02 The Familiarity She Had with "The Field" & Why Her Family Moved There

00:06:17 The Organization Her Grandfather Started & All Its Rules

00:12:48 How The Cult's Teachings Still Stick with Her Today & It's Effect on Her Mother

00:18:00 Michelle Talks about the Healing that She Got By Being With Her Mom at the End of Her Life

00:22:35 Michelle’s Connection With the Earth

00:25:51 CW: CA, Michelle Mentions Her Father's Abuse and How Sickness Led to Her Growing More Independent

00:29:56 Michelle Talks about Being Hospitalized and Discovering She Had an Autoimmune Disorder

00:33:12 Michelle’s Time in the Hospital & Her Education from Reading the Bible

00:39:59 The Cult's Proselyting Methods, Beliefs About Christianity, & Fundraising

00:45:30 CW: Brief Mentions of Suic*dal Thoughts, Michelle Shares the Complicated Experiences Surrounding Her First Romance

00:51:20 Michelle Shares Her First Experiences Outside the Cult & Her Life Now

00:55:44 Michelle's Final Thoughts & Linda Listen

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Jaksot(348)

Lured into the TWELVE TRIBES (Yellow Deli) Cult

Lured into the TWELVE TRIBES (Yellow Deli) Cult

Lured into the TWELVE TRIBES (Yellow Deli) CultTIMESTAMPS UNAVAILABLE FOR THIS EPISODETamara Mathieu was a new mother in a scary world where Columbine had just happened. Romanticizing a simple life and craving safety for her family, she began visiting the Twelve Tribes. She noticed a village raising the well behaved chiIdren, homemade food and happy families. Feeling alone, isolated and overwhelmed at home with her baby, she spent more and more time at their compounds. She was welcomed with open arms, given gift baskets and the women loved her chiId. It felt like home. She convinced her husband to leave his high paying job, sell their home and all their belongings and completely leave their modern life behind to move into the Twelve Tribes. Assigned one bedroom for their family, everything changed once they moved in. Work became excruciating, chiId discipline expectations were extreme and Tamara would see her husband even less than before. Regret set in, but it was too late. She wouldn’t escape the community until 14 years later.Click here to watch on YouTubeWatch pt 2Watch the interview with Tamara's son, EmmetFind Tamara!FB: Tamara Mathieu Author IG: https://www.instagram.com/tamaramathieu4/Book: All Who BelievedSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

7 Loka 1h 22min

She Silenced Whistleblowers of Abusive Evangelical Academy, Then Became One (Why She Flipped)

She Silenced Whistleblowers of Abusive Evangelical Academy, Then Became One (Why She Flipped)

Featured in the Shiny Happy People 2 doc-series, Cindy was deep in evangelical nationalism when she was hired as head of PR to silence whistleblowers from the Honor Academy at Teen Mania. She was told they were simply disgruntled chiIdren who were lying to defame the massive enterprise. Years later, she would realize, not only were the alumni telling the truth, but the upper management knew about the tort*re the chiIdren went through and did nothing to stop it, or change their practices for the following group. In fact, it was all part of the system to break the will of the interns and mold them into warriors for Jesus so they could penetrate all facets of society and create a Christian nation. Once Cindy’s eyes were opened, she took all their insider financial information to a news station to blast the story to the world. Click here to watch on YouTubeEmail Cindy: CindyMallette@gmail.comWatch the interview with Mica RingoSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

6 Loka 1h 25min

Why Fanatical Worldwide MINISTRIES Was Terrified of Silenced Alumni Speaking Out

Why Fanatical Worldwide MINISTRIES Was Terrified of Silenced Alumni Speaking Out

Mica Ringo was heavily invested in Teen Mania and went through the whole program completely ignoring xyr inner voice of authenticity. Being yourself was never an option in a group that specifically molds teens to be extremist warriors for Jesus. The program was grueling and even abusive in an attempt to break down the character of teens coming in. Mica would go on to create the Recovering Alumni blog which would lead to the fall of Teen Mania Ministries!Click here to watch on YouTubeFind Mica on social media:IG: https://www.instagram.com/mx.micaringo/Website: https://www.micaringo.comWatch the interview with Cindy Mallette, the person hired to silence MicaSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**Chapter Marks00:00:00 intro00:05:46 Mica's upbringing00:09:38 Things that lead Mica on the path towards Team Mania00:15:27 Navigating Mica's s*xuality within purity culture00:17:53 Mica's involvement in Team Mania00:27:36 The Honor Academy00:45:09 Mica's blog00:56:55 Mica's Marriage & deconstruction01:09:44 Mica goes to the press01:15:04 Linda, listen01:16:12 What brings Mica joy nowSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

3 Loka 1h 19min

5 Women from 5 AMISH Settlements Compare Notes

5 Women from 5 AMISH Settlements Compare Notes

TIMESTAMPS UNAVAILABLE FOR THIS EPISODECelebrating 250 episodes with these 5 incredible women! We explore ways in which different Amish and sometimes Mennonite settlements had the same methods of control and even ab*se. We cover their rules, restrictions, medical allowances (or lack thereof), why CSA is rampant and how the perpetr*tors are often protected rather than truly held accountable. The stories and wisdom are beautifully shared amongst survivors supporting each other. They also share ways in which they believe women can take back their power in or outside a cult and gain clarity and freedom.Click here to watch on YouTubeFind and support our guests!Lizzie HershbergerSwartzentruber AMISH: The Unknown SINISTER Side of the Strictist Settlement Swartzentruber AMISH: Seeking JUSTICE Against the Strictest SettlementResources: https://www.theplainpeoplespodcast.com/resourceHer book: “Behind Blue Curtains: A True Crime Memoir of an Amish Woman’s Survival, Escape, and Pursuit of Justice” Website: https://www.lizziehershberger.com/IG @lizzie.hershberger Naomi SwartzentruberAMISH: How Growing Up in the Strictest Settlement Led to Dr*gs and S*x Work Naomi’s book: The Amazing Adventures of an Amish Stripper IG & TT: @AmishInspiration https://www.instagram.com/AmishInspirationhttps://www.tiktok.com/@amishinspirationFB: https://www.facebook.com/share/1Aq4Tw6q9h/?mibextid=wwXIfrElizabeth HiltyAMISH: Her Unlicensed Midwives Used Veterinary Tools Connect with Elizabeth on FacebookMeg Delagrange-Belfon“Sins of the Amish” Doc: Darker Details than They Were Willing to Release on TV Her artwork: https://www.coloringspirit.com/Her Blog: https://blendedmix.life/IG: @coloringspirit Plain Anna Mary BylerAMISH Woman "Sinned" by Taking Her Brothers to Court for SA Mary's Website: https://www.themisfitamish.com/amishresourcesIG @plainrainbows_mary Mary's Book: Reflections and Memories of An Amish Misfit: "My therapist says that’s not true, but I digress" Fb: https://www.facebook.com/Mary.A.Byler/TikTok: the.misfit.amishSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

2 Loka 2h 12min

Why Teens are Being Weaponized & Trained for “End Times” Martyrdom (ft. April Ajoy)

Why Teens are Being Weaponized & Trained for “End Times” Martyrdom (ft. April Ajoy)

Following up our initial interview with the incredible April Ajoy, we go LIVE with her to further discuss her upbringing as a Christian Nation*list, in which they drilled into teens a persecution complex that would put their life on the line as a declared “believer”. Fresh off the heels of “Shiny Happy People: Teenage Holy War”, April is a successful content creator and podcast host, sharing stories from her past and how she flipped a 180 in her thinking and way of life.Click here to watch on YouTubeWatch April’s initial interviewFind April:Book: Star-Spangled Jesus IG: https://www.instagram.com/aprilajoy/Podcast: The Tim and April ShowSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

1 Loka 47min

Mormon Church Loses Appeal After Failure to Report CSA (abuse continued 4 years) ft. Kolby Reddish

Mormon Church Loses Appeal After Failure to Report CSA (abuse continued 4 years) ft. Kolby Reddish

Last month the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints lost an appeal to remain blameless in the case of two bishops not reporting egregious acts of CSA in the state of Arizona. Today we go in depth with former guest and current lawyer Kolby Reddish to further discuss the case and potential legal outcome.Click here to watch on YouTubeCheck out our interviews with Kolby: Mormon Church SUED for Not Reporting Unspeakable Confessions (the Verdict) ft. Kolby ReddishMormonism On Trial: Ex-Mormon Lawyer Challenges Truth ClaimsHow a Mormon Lawyer Lost His Faith Ft. Kolby ReddishSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

30 Syys 44min

 Taken Back to “The Family” Cult Commune After Mass Police Raid

Taken Back to “The Family” Cult Commune After Mass Police Raid

After escaping the COG cult in Australia with her husband, Maria Esguerra spent years in higher education so she could become a psychologist and better understand her past. Her mission now is to help other survivors of high control groups and people, move through their trauma and find healing in understanding. She is even doing her best to help legally forge a path for those who are victims of coercive control and help the courts understand that crimes are not always so black and white. Our discussion covers the ways in which children's wiring is not only affected, but hijacked, when growing up in dangerous and or high control cults. Click here to watch on YouTubeFind and Support Maria!The Olive Leaf Network: Linktr.ee https://linktr.ee/MariaesguerraIG @cultpsyc TikTok: @mariaesguerra13 FB: https://www.facebook.com/maria.esguerra.75436DeCult: www.decult.netSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

29 Syys 1h 43min

Why Daughter of Famous Evangelist Pastor Speaks Out AGAINST Her Childhood Teachings

Why Daughter of Famous Evangelist Pastor Speaks Out AGAINST Her Childhood Teachings

Fresh off the heels of “Shiny Happy People: Teenage Holy War” we sit with April Ajoy. She wouldn’t have called herself a Christian Nation*list when she performed her original song “America Say Jesus” on the Jim Bakker show, or when she participated in Jesus Marches across America. April just considered herself a good Christian: faithful, and determined to make America a Christian nation once again. But as her view of the world widened, and she was faced with loss, grief and confronting beliefs, she began to take a closer look at the ideology she fiercely defended and preached herself. A successful content creator and podcast host, April shares stories from her past and how she flipped a 180 in her thinking and way of life. Click here to watch on YouTubeFind April:Book: Star-Spangled Jesus https://www.amazon.com/dp/1546006680IG: @aprilajoyPodcast: The Tim and April ShowSubscribe to our C2C "CLIPS" Channel!Support C2C - Any donations are welcome and appreciated to support the making of this podcast.Find our FULL (uncensored) merch store here!Patreon https://www.patreon.com/cultstoconsciousnessVenmo @sheliseannFind us on Social media!Instagram @cultstoconsciousness Host Instagram @sheliseann Co Producer / Host @jonathan.rosales_ TikTok @cults.to.consciousness Twitter @cultstocon **Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

26 Syys 1h 27min

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