118: The Difference Between Familiarity and Comfort

Something that has been making it's way into my awareness A LOT lately is the difference between familiarity and comfort.

The language we use to describe thoughts and emotions is massively powerful and can create a mental and emotional state of stop or go.

In the personal development space there is a lot of talk about the comfort zone and how we need to step out of our comfort zone where all the magic happen. I had Andy Molinsky on the show back at episode 85 to talk about his book Reach, which is a very well written book on how to strategically step outside your comfort zone. The strategies he outlines are fantastic and very useful, and what I dive into today is how our comfort zone is anything but comfortable. Let's call it a bit of a meta concept if you will.

The objective of getting out of your comfort zone is to achieve your goals, create change, and experience results that you want.

Clearly we have to take new actions to experience a different result, but the analogy of the comfort zone didn't do it for me. It was almost as if I was just trading one frazzled state for another. When I thought about this deeper, it made more sense... it doesn't seem like a worth while trade.

After being with it for a little while I started to see the distinction more clearly. What I was calling my comfort zone wasn't comfortable at all. It was actually creating a lot of collateral damage and unnecessary pain. It wasn't that it was comfortable, it was just familiar.

One of the biggest distinctions that helped me "get out of my comfort zone" was beginning to approach it with curiosity and through the lens of exploring the unfamiliar.

After you tune in to today's show, come over to the show notes and let me know what you think in the comments below.

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