Towers, Crystals, and Corpses (FF4 Part 3)
Final Fancast15 Elo 2025

Towers, Crystals, and Corpses (FF4 Part 3)

This episode takes us from Troya to the Magnetic Cave to Mithril to Agart and, finally, straight into a battle between dwarf tanks and flying airships full of monsters. Luckily the only people who die are the ones closest to us with the most to live for. Aw heck.

You better not bring any of that metal crap into MY magnet cave, bro. Edward knows a song dark elves hate. Please stop feasting on my blood, Zubats. If I had a quarter for every time I ran into a high tech tower in this episode, I would have two quarters -- which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice in one episode. This episode's swear jar, on the other hand, overflows.

At the beginning of this episode we describe the twins doing an act of heroic self-sacrifice in the last leg a la Minwu as a "Min-two" when "Twinwu" was right there and we're so mad at ourselves for not seeing it.

Jaksot(41)

After Years II (FF4 The After Years Part 10-B)

After Years II (FF4 The After Years Part 10-B)

At long last, the end of our Final Fantasy IV: The After Years series! In this special jumbo-sized two-part finale, Mike and Remy work through the extremely long final chapter, The Crystal: The Planet...

1 Touko 2h 9min

After Years I (FF4 The After Years Part 10-A)

After Years I (FF4 The After Years Part 10-A)

At long last, the end of our Final Fantasy IV: The After Years series! In this special jumbo-sized two-part finale, Mike and Remy work through the extremely long final chapter, The Crystal: The Planet...

1 Touko 2h 2min

Evil-ution at Its Purest (FF4 The After Years Part 9)

Evil-ution at Its Purest (FF4 The After Years Part 9)

It's the FuSoYa chapter starring Golbez. Is Golbez's first name Theodore or Selena? Counts rule counties; Count Malboros rule Big Mean Jerkface County. FuSoYa, the powerful Lunarian archmage, seems to...

13 Maalis 1h 32min

Twingers If You Will (FF4 The After Years Part 8)

Twingers If You Will (FF4 The After Years Part 8)

For all our complaining about The After Years, Kain's Tale mostly worked for us. In fact, according to Mike, this was the "high point of the After Years so far." He even liked Cid in this bit -- which...

27 Helmi 1h 53min

What's Eating Gilbert the Great? (FF4 The After Years Part 7)

What's Eating Gilbert the Great? (FF4 The After Years Part 7)

The English translation of Final Fantasy IV lied to us. Damcyan is economically fudged up but Edward is so hot everyone cuts him slack with being a bad monarch. Hey, what happened to the hovercraft fr...

13 Helmi 1h 45min

Too Much Chore Door (FF4 The After Years Part 6)

Too Much Chore Door (FF4 The After Years Part 6)

The dragon is crying. Porom is a parentified child. Edge is spotted lurking in the bushes wearing a t-shirt that says "sicko" and rubbing his hands together. We really lay into Kain this time, folks. ...

30 Tammi 1h 33min

You Can't Woo the Zu (FF4 The After Years Part 5)

You Can't Woo the Zu (FF4 The After Years Part 5)

Name a more iconic team of four ninjas. Oh. Yeah, I guess the Ninja Turtles. Well. Here are four other ninjas. They aren't turtles. One of them is a kite sort of. We go to a brothel for plot reasons. ...

16 Tammi 1h 46min

Should Have Cast Hindsight (FF4 The After Years Part 4)

Should Have Cast Hindsight (FF4 The After Years Part 4)

Sometimes you get stuck with a timeloop curse. Sometimes you gotta replay part of the game. Spoiler alert: sometimes you have to do it again later. I hope you like cold opens, mid-credits scenes, and ...

19 Joulu 20251h 51min

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