129. The Anxious/Avoidant Dynamic in Dating with Carly Ann

Coming up on this episode of Flirations, we’re joined by Carly Ann, a therapist and attachment expert, here to have a conversation with us about the anxious/avoidant dynamic in dating!

We’ll talk about why this duo happens so often in dating, how to spot the difference between lovebombing and genuine interest, are they avoidant or not interested, and how anxiety shows up in the dating process.

We’ll get into what to do when insecurities, self doubt, or attachment wounds try to pull us off track and how your attachment style and nervous system are connected.

We’ll explore the origins of our attachment styles, why it’s not only about your childhood and family dynamics, and even how our attachment styles are fluid, not fixed.

Finally, how to tell the difference between chemistry and compatibility, ways to build secure attachments with others and within ourselves, and some communication strategies for early dating.

So, whether you feel like you’ve experienced the anxious/avoidant dynamic before, are curious to learn more, or just need something to listen (hello!), this episode is for you.

Let’s do this, Flirties, and meet Carly Ann!

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About our guest: Carly Ann is an integrative therapist who helps people who worry, overthink, and find themselves stuck in unhealthy relationship patterns. She supports those who feel anxious, fear abandonment, or find themselves overreacting, especially when it feels like they have already tried everything.

Carly Ann’s mission is to show people that they are not alone and they are not stuck. Through her work, she helps individuals stop feeling “crazy” and reconnect with the version of themselves they were always meant to be: content, secure, and confident, before life, criticism, or loneliness made them doubt who they are.

Work with Carly Ann: 21 Day Anxious to Secure Course, grab the Anxious Attachment Bundle, follow on Instagram, and Subscribe on YouTube.

About your host: Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy - with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!

As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the Flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage.

Ultimately, this practice of connection helps flirters and daters alike create stronger relationships, transcend limiting beliefs, and develop an unwavering love for the self.

His work has been featured in Fortune, NBC News, The Huffington Post, Men's Health, and Yoga Journal.

You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, watch on YouTube, and stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.