335. It's okay to change your mind

In our twenties, the feedback sources that once defined our worth - grades, report cards, and parental praise - start to disappear. This leaves a void, which many of us instinctively turn to external sources like social media, career achievements, and the opinions of others, to fill. And while this external validation isn’t inherently bad, we need to be mindful of refilling our own sense of self before becoming reliant on others. In this episode, we discuss why a life built on others' approval is like living on quicksand and how to cultivate a sturdy, reliable sense of self that will withstand the inevitable ebb and flow of external opinions. We’ll explore: • The difference between external and internal validation• Why our brains are wired to seek social approval• The looking glass self and the inherent need to belong• How contingent self-esteem can quietly erode confidence• How to recognise when you’re outsourcing your self-worth• Balancing feedback without letting it define you If the number of likes on your Instagram post has ever dictated how you feel - this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

25 Syys 42min

We live in a world full of opinions, advice, and expectations - and somewhere in the noise, our own inner voice can get drowned out. Learning to trust yourself sounds simple, but in practice it’s a hard skills to build. Doubt, fear of mistakes, and the pressure to “get it right” often pull us away from what we already know deep down. In this episode, we explore the psychology of self-trust: how it develops, why it falters, and what it really means to listen to yourself in a culture that constantly tells you to look outward for answers. We’ll explore:• Why self-trust is so crucial in this decade• Self-trust as the antidote to anxiety• How self-trust is shaped by early experiences and current circumstances• Small ways to practice trusting yourself again• Why trusting yourself is less about certainty and more about self-respect If you’ve ever second-guessed yourself into exhaustion, or felt like your inner compass has gone quiet, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

19 Syys 39min

Hate is one of those emotions we don’t like to admit we feel – it’s messy, intense, and often laced with guilt. But it’s also deeply human. It can flare up in obvious moments of conflict, or linger quietly as resentment, judgment, or mistrust. But it’s how we engage with it that makes the big difference. In this episode, we explore the reasons we love to hate - where it comes from, why it’s so powerful, and the ways it can both protect and harm us. We’ll look at how it spreads in a hyperconnected world, and ways we can respond to it if we feel it in ourselves or from others. We’ll explore:• The roots of hatred in group identity, safety and insecurity• Why hating can feel good • Personality traits of trolls• Why our biggest critics can be those closest to us• How hate affects our mind and body• How to stop being a hater, and how to respond to hate from others If you want to explore this difficult emotion without judgement, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

16 Syys 51min

We all want to know the secret to true, lasting love so that we can perhaps have a shot at finding it. So in today's episode, we're breaking down perhaps the most famous theory on this very topic, Robert Sternbery's Triangular Theory of Love. In this episode, we talk about: The 3 core ingredients of love: intimacy, passion, commitment How different combinations form different kinds of relationships Why “consummate love” is so rare, and hard to maintain What the theory leaves out: culture, trust, respect, asexuality, polyamory A look at the newer “quadruple theory” of love Listen now! ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

14 Syys 21min

We often see pets as just a part of our daily lives - the ones who greet us at the door, curl up beside us, or demand breakfast at 6 a.m. sharp. But behind those everyday moments lies a bond that’s shaped by millions of years of co-evolution and a deep emotional connection that can transform us. In this episode, we look at the psychology of our relationships with our pets - how they are so transformative, soothe our stress, shift our moods, and even change the way we relate to other people. Pets aren’t just companions; they can become anchors in times of change, mirrors for our emotions, and constant reminders of simple joy. We’ll explore:• The science of why we bond so strongly with animals• How our pets mirror our mental health• Survival of the cutest• The pain of losing a childhood pet, and disenfranchised grief• FOUR key questions to ask yourself if you’re thinking of committing to a pet Whether you’re a proud pet parent or just curious about why humans are so drawn to animals, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

11 Syys 46min

Happiness often feels like a simple goal - something we’re told to chase or “find” if we’re lucky. But it’s not just about good moods or quick wins. True happiness is more subtle, shaped by how we show up in life, the people we surround ourselves with, and the meaning we create along the way. In this episode, we dive into what happiness really means in your twenties and beyond - why it can be so hard to hold onto, and how it’s tied to more than just feeling good. We’ll explore: Why happiness isn’t a permanent state, but a shifting experience How everyday habits and relationships quietly influence our sense of happiness The PERMA model of happiness Why chasing pleasure doesn’t always lead to fulfilment Busting the 3 biggest myths about happiness Simple, real ways to build happiness for now, and for the future If you’re tired of chasing constant happiness and want to explore a more genuine, meaningful way to experience joy – this one is for you. ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

9 Syys 55min

In this episode we break down the growing conversation around the “male loneliness epidemic”: what’s true, what’s misleading, and what the research actually says. This is a complex and controversial topic, but one that deserves a clear, evidence-based perspective. Why has loneliness been declared a global health crisis? How the global loneliness epidemic differs from the male loneliness epidemic Are men actually the lonelier gender? The role of patriarchy, the manosphere, scapegoating, and in-group/out-group psychology The consequences for both men and women Healthy, proactive approaches to tackling loneliness in society Plus, so much more! Drop your thoughts below. For mental health support: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/ ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/general-clean Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

4 Syys 51min