Is Self-Improvement Just Making Us More Selfish?

Is Self-Improvement Just Making Us More Selfish?

Is personal development and self-improvement making us better—or just more self-absorbed? In today's episode, we wade into the debate sparked by a recent New York Times article (link below) about whether the world of betterment is actually helping with personal growth, or just creating inward navel-gazing? We discuss how to think about the role of individual agency in a world of structural challenge, the pitfalls of hyper-optimization, and why nuance (and community) matter more than ever. We explore how to use self-help as a tool—without letting it take over your life. Whether you’re a self-improvement skeptic or a die-hard devotee, this conversation will give you new ways to think about growth, agency, and what it really means to be excellent, on both an individual and collective level.


"Is Today's Self-Help Teaching Everyone to Be a Jerk?" by Emma Goldberg: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/25/style/self-help-books-columns-readers.html


Unedited transcript: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1mzKxdG-NcdRbzUsKH6IEMLGt3z5Z7Fln00AN1T4hN3U/edit?usp=sharing


If you have a questions for us, send an email to clay.growtheq@gmail.com or call our voicemail at ‪(646) 893-9503‬.


Subscribe to The Growth Equation newsletter: https://thegrowtheq.com/newsletters/geq/


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078 - The Coach Up: Don't Be a Day Trader

078 - The Coach Up: Don't Be a Day Trader

A quick story about the 2021-2022 Golden State Warriors, a conversation with then General Manager Bob Myers, and how to apply some wisdom from finance to any of your ambitious, long-term pursuits.Join The Growth Equation Academy today. 40% off for a limited time!https://the-growtheq-academy.mn.co/If you are enjoying FAREWELL, do us a huge favor: text your favorite episode to three people so they can enjoy it, too. Thanks!iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidPocketCastsGot a question, feedback, or ideas for the show? Email clay.growtheq@gmail.com or leave a voicemail at (646) 893-9503 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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077 -  Peak Performance: 10 Rules for Sustainable Excellence

077 - Peak Performance: 10 Rules for Sustainable Excellence

Drawing on a recent talk that Brad gave to his hometown Detroit Tigers of the MLB, the guys discuss 10 of the core principles that have come out of years of studying and working with elite performers on how to achieve peak performance and sustain excellence over time.Join The Growth Equation Academy today. 40% off for a limited time!https://the-growtheq-academy.mn.co/If you are enjoying FAREWELL, do us a huge favor: text your favorite episode to three people so they can enjoy it, too. Thanks!iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidPocketCastsGot a question, feedback, or ideas for the show? Email clay.growtheq@gmail.com or leave a voicemail at (646) 893-9503 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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076 - The 3 P's: A Simple Tool to Be More Optimistic

076 - The 3 P's: A Simple Tool to Be More Optimistic

The stories we tell ourselves about what happens to us are powerful. Today, drawing on the work of psychologist Dr. Martin Seligman, we discuss a simple reframing tool that will allow you to interpret the events of your life in a way that leads to more optimism and less negativity.Join The Growth Equation Academy today. 40% off for a limited time!https://the-growtheq-academy.mn.co/If you are enjoying FAREWELL, do us a huge favor: text your favorite episode to three people so they can enjoy it, too. Thanks!iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidPocketCastsGot a question, feedback, or ideas for the show? Email clay.growtheq@gmail.com or leave a voicemail at (646) 893-9503 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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075 - Mastering the Mind: Layne Norton on Pain, Motivation, and Success

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074 - The 85% Rule and the Art of Hard Effort

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073 - Sleep Science: What Actually Matters

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Not that long ago, it was considered a badge of honor to "hustle" or "grind" off of only four or five hours of sleep a night. Thankfully, we've come to a better understanding of the importance and value of a good night's sleep—maybe too much so, however. Sleep has become the latest obsession among the optimization set, with an entire cottage industry of supplements, gadgets, and trackers meant to help us get some high-quality shuteye. But this fixation is providing as much anxiety as rest. Today, Steve and Clay break down the myths, realities, and science of good sleep. Plus: they react to a clip from an upcoming Netflix documentary about New York Jets' quarterback Aaron Rodgers.Aaron Rodgers clip: https://x.com/netflix/status/1833188677767286939Join The Growth Equation Academy today. 40% off for a limited time!https://the-growtheq-academy.mn.co/If you are enjoying FAREWELL, do us a huge favor: text your favorite episode to three people so they can enjoy it, too. Thanks!iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidPocketCastsGot a question, feedback, or ideas for the show? Email clay.growtheq@gmail.com or leave a voicemail at (646) 893-9503 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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072 - Navigating Our Inner Selves: A Lesson from George Saunders

072 - Navigating Our Inner Selves: A Lesson from George Saunders

On today's episode of The Coach Up, Clay revisits a conversation he had with the award-winning author George Saunders, about navigating the different parts and versions of our identities that show up at various moments in our days and lives—and how we can create the conditions that allow our best selves to be most reliably present.Join The Growth Equation Academy today. 40% off for a limited time!https://the-growtheq-academy.mn.co/If you are enjoying FAREWELL, do us a huge favor: text your favorite episode to three people so they can enjoy it, too. Thanks!iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidPocketCastsGot a question, feedback, or ideas for the show? Email clay.growtheq@gmail.com or leave a voicemail at (646) 893-9503 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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071 - Debunking Masculinity Myths & Redefining Modern Manhood

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In recent years, the idea of masculinity has undergone a cultural and societal shift. Though the evolution was much needed and long overdue, it has left many men uncertain of where to turn for positive models and definitions of masculinity. Some have turned to fitness and performance personalities or gym bros who celebrate physical suffering, bio-hacking, and even a return to more primitive or primal ways of living—approaches that don't seem to allow for a more evolved, nuanced understanding of what it means to be a man. On today's episode, Brad, Steve, and Clay discuss how we got here and where they think we should go. They discuss the psychological factors that have left men feeling emasculated, why the conventional alpha male paradigm is wrong, the difference in physical performance and physical suffering, and how fitness culture—and particularly lifting weights—plays into ideas about masculinity.For previous discussions on masculinity, check out these two previous episodes in which Brad and Steve talk to Richard Reeves, author of the book "Of Boys and Men."https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/167-men-and-masculinity-part-1/id1505257676?i=1000609957049https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/168-men-and-masculinity-part-2/id1505257676?i=1000610671022Join The Growth Equation Academy today. 40% off for a limited time!https://the-growtheq-academy.mn.co/If you are enjoying FAREWELL, do us a huge favor: text your favorite episode to three people so they can enjoy it, too. Thanks!iTunes and Apple PodcastsSpotifyAndroidPocketCastsGot a question, feedback, or ideas for the show? Email clay.growtheq@gmail.com or leave a voicemail at (646) 893-9503 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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