FAMILIARS (Remastered) - Why You Shouldn't Throw the House cat at a Kobold

Ever wonder what happens when you give a wizard a housecat and poor impulse control? We did—and now the kobold population is down one.

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Whether you're in Athens, on vacation, or hiding from your dice curse, Nick runs D&D, Call of Cthulhu, Vampire: The Masquerade, and more—online or in-person, tailored to your party's wildest dreams (or darkest regrets).

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He's got minis, maps, madness—and yes, he's fluent in both Greek and goblin.

Episode Summary

In this episode of the RPGBOT.Podcast, the gang dives whiskers-first into the magical, mystical, and occasionally murderous world of familiars in tabletop RPGs. From Pathfinder to D&D and beyond, we examine what happens when your arcane support animal becomes the party MVP—or a tragic footnote in the kobold kill count.

Ash tries to argue that the toad is a viable combat companion. Tyler reminds us that the hawk definitely doesn't have thumbs. Randall... well, Randall has a deeply concerning attachment to his fox, whom he insists is "just a little guy, your honor."

Expect practical advice, chaotic anecdotes, and passionate hot takes on why your next spellcaster should come with a built-in critter co-pilot.

Key Takeaways

• Familiars are more than flavor: These aren't just spellbook-warming fluffballs—they can scout, deliver spells, and manipulate the action economy if you build them right.
• Pick the right pet for the job: Owls? Great for flyby tactics. Frogs? Great for... ambiance. Imp? Great for morally questionable espionage and tax evasion.
• Don't get them killed: Familiars may be magically bound, but they're emotionally expensive. Losing one mid-dungeon isn't just tragic—it's also a wasted action economy investment and possibly a therapy bill.
• In Pathfinder 2e: The familiar system is highly customizable—think of it like Build-A-Bear with spell slots. Choose abilities like "Deliver a Touch Spell" or "Can Lick Its Own Eyebrows" depending on your tactical goals.
• Familiars are not Pokémon: You cannot legally send them into battle for XP farming. You can, however, use them as adorable bait. The ethical line is blurry, but the kobolds are definitely distracted.
• Beware of DM interpretation: That squirrel familiar might be RAW legal, but if your DM hates rodents, you will be hunted by owlbears. Plan accordingly.
• You can give your familiar a name, but not a pension: Remember—if you're going to bond with the ferret that ferries fireballs, don't forget a cute name. (Suggestions include: Toast, Balthazar, LegallyDistinctPikachu.)

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How to Find Us:

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Tyler Kamstra

• BlueSky: @rpgbot.net
• TikTok: @RPGBOTDOTNET

Ash Ely

• Professional Game Master on StartPlaying.Games
• BlueSky: @GravenAshes
• YouTube: @ashravenmedia

Randall James

• BlueSky: @GrimoireRPG
• Amateurjack.com
• Read Melancon: A Grimoire Tale (affiliate link)

Producer Dan

• @Lzr_illuminati