E53 | When perimenopause and autistic burnout collide - with AuDHDer Jen

Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of suicidal thoughts, emotional manipulation / boundaries and trauma. Please listen with care.

In part two of our conversation with Jen, we go deeper into the cost of living in survival mode for almost five decades - and what happens when the body and brain can no longer keep up.

Jen shares how perimenopause intersected with her AuDHD and long-term burnout, amplifying symptoms and stripping away coping mechanisms that had held her together for years. We unpack early warning signs of burnout and perimenopause that are often missed or misattributed, particularly in late-diagnosed neurodivergent women.

We talk about delayed processing and how it has impacted Jen’s relationships, safety, and sense of self — including how manipulation and abuse can go unnoticed until the nervous system finally has space to process what happened. Jen reflects on how pursuing a PhD exposed both her strengths and her limits, and the profound toll this took on her mental health.

This episode is an honest, vulnerable conversation about collapse, grief, and the necessity of radically changing your life when survival is no longer sustainable. It’s for anyone who feels like they’ve been “coping” for decades - and are only now realising the cost.

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