Lights On with Carl Lentz11 Mar

Your Husband Is Lying. Your Nervous System Knows It.

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.com

Three listener questions. All of them about what betrayal actually does to a

person. Not just to the marriage. To the voice inside that kept saying

something is wrong.

A woman who spent years convincing herself she was the problem just found out

her husband has a gambling addiction and has been lying to her for years. Carl

and Laura break down the difference between intuition and anxiety, why

gaslighting trains you to distrust the nudge, and the three-step process for

rebuilding self-trust. Carl also delivers something every husband in recovery

needs to hear: full disclosure does not just help your wife. It restores her

confidence in herself.

A woman two years into dating a man she loves has discovered multiple lies

about his past. He is honest when confronted. Never before. Carl and Laura

explain why being honest when caught is not the same as being honest, and why

the question is never about his past. It is about his integrity under low

pressure. Because marriage does not reduce pressure. It multiplies it.

A woman three years past her husband's infidelity is still together, has done

the work, and still feels emotionally abandoned. Carl distinguishes remorse

from repair. One says I am sorry. The other says I can stay present in your

pain. Most men only know how to do one.

This episode will challenge anyone who believes that stopping the behavior

is the same thing as doing the work.

Follow Carl at: https://www.instagram.com/carllentz/

Follow Laura at: https://www.instagram.com/lauralentz/

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Episoder(102)

What Your Anger is Actually Trying to Tell You

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comA listener wrote in with a question almost every betrayed spouse eventually wrestles with: I have every right to be angry, but I can feel it...

29 Jun 56min

The two decisions every couple has to make after betrayal

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comAfter last week's episode reframing the most asked question in betrayal recovery, Carl and Laura pick up exactly where they left off. In thi...

22 Jun 33min

Should I stay or should I leave? (You're asking the wrong question)

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comAfter betrayal, almost every couple lands on the same question: should I stay or should I leave? In this episode of Lights On, Carl and Laur...

15 Jun 30min

You Will Not Get Around to a Healthy Marriage "Someday" (Part 2 with the Metcalfs)

Charles and Abby Metcalf are back at the table, and this one goes deeper than part one. In this episode of Lights On, Carl, Laura, Charles, and Abby get into the parts of marriage that quietly erode u...

8 Jun 1h 8min

What Kids Actually Do to Your Marriage | Ft. Charles and Abby Metcalf

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comFor the first time on Lights On, Carl and Laura invited guests to the table: Charles and Abby Metcalf, dear friends, pastors, and parents of...

1 Jun 59min

How do you rebuild intimacy after betrayal?

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.com This is the number one question Carl and Laura get asked, so they finally gave it a whole episode. A listener wrote in asking how you rebui...

25 Mai 55min

How do you parent your kids when you feel disqualified?

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comWhen a parent emailed asking how to discipline their kids after blowing up the family, we knew this conversation needed its own episode. The...

18 Mai 40min

How Do You Know When FORGIVENESS Is REAL?

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comWhen a husband emailed asking why his wife still brings up his affair every week, three years after it happened, even though she says she ha...

11 Mai 48min