#244: I Healed My Anxious Attachment… So Why Don’t I Want a Relationship Anymore? (Ask Steph)

#244: I Healed My Anxious Attachment… So Why Don’t I Want a Relationship Anymore? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I’m responding to a question I hear more often than you might expect. Someone has done a lot of work on their anxious attachment patterns, they feel more grounded and secure, and now they find themselves with very little interest in dating or relationships.

I talk about how this can sometimes be a natural pendulum swing. When you have spent a long time orienting around other people, trying to be chosen, accommodating, and overextending yourself, it makes sense that there would be a period of pulling back. For many people, that space allows for a real sense of peace, self-expression, and reconnection with who they are outside of a relationship.

At the same time, I explore how this experience can come from different places. For some, it reflects genuine contentment in their single life. For others, there may still be a protective element underneath it, particularly if being in a relationship has historically meant losing themselves.

This episode is about understanding what is actually driving that shift, so you can move forward in a way that is aligned with what you truly want, rather than simply reacting to your past patterns.



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Episoder(278)

#278: How to Navigate Being Triggered by a Partner's Moodiness

#278: How to Navigate Being Triggered by a Partner's Moodiness

In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm answering the listener question of "How do I navigate being triggered by my partner's moodiness and irritability?" This is such a common pain point for folks with anx...

18 Aug 10min

#277: What to Look For in a Long-Term Partner

#277: What to Look For in a Long-Term Partner

Choosing who you're going to commit to is a life-altering decision — so it's little wonder so many of us feel the weight of that pressure, and experience doubt around whether we're making the "right" ...

13 Aug 13min

#276: Attachment & Conflict (Part 4): Repairing After Relationship Rupture

#276: Attachment & Conflict (Part 4): Repairing After Relationship Rupture

Learning to repair after conflict or ruptures is one of the most valuable relationship skills you'll ever have. But for many of us, meaningful repair isn't something we ever really learned or had mode...

4 Aug 22min

#275: Why You Can't Get Over Your Ex

#275: Why You Can't Get Over Your Ex

In today's episode, we're talking about why you struggle to "get over" your ex. This is something so many people struggle with when it comes to break-ups — feeling like the person who left us still oc...

30 Jul 22min

#274: Attachment & Conflict (Part 3): How to Experience Healthier Conflict

#274: Attachment & Conflict (Part 3): How to Experience Healthier Conflict

Join the Secure Self Challenge hereToday's episode is part 3 of my Attachment & Conflict series, and we're talking all about how to transform the way you do conflict. I'll be sharing general tips and ...

21 Jul 32min

#273: Attachment & Conflict (Part 2): Avoidant Attachment

#273: Attachment & Conflict (Part 2): Avoidant Attachment

Register for the Secure Self Challenge hereIn today's episode, we're talking once again about how attachment patterns shape our experience of conflict in relationships, with a particular focus on avoi...

16 Jul 24min

#272: How to Talk to Your Partner About Their Avoidant Attachment (Ask Steph)

#272: How to Talk to Your Partner About Their Avoidant Attachment (Ask Steph)

Access the replay for the Anxious Attachment Protest Behaviour workshopIn today's Ask Steph episode, I'm answering the question of: "How do I talk to my partner about their avoidant attachment without...

9 Jul 10min

#271: Fearful Avoidant Attachment: Guidance for Partners (Part 4)

#271: Fearful Avoidant Attachment: Guidance for Partners (Part 4)

Last chance to register for the free Anxious Attachment Protest Behaviour workshopToday's episode is the fourth and final instalment of my deep dive series into fearful avoidant attachment, and this e...

7 Jul 23min

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