28. Why ADHD still feels so hard - even when you understand it

ADHD is being talked about more than ever. But for many, life still feels harder than it should. Even with a diagnosis there can be a lingering sense of “Why is life still so difficult?”

In this episode, Sonia speaks with ADHD coach Alex Campbell, to find out what we’re missing.

Alex says ADHD brains are motivated by interest, not importance. But the world expects the opposite, and that’s the where issues arise.

People often develop hidden systems to try to meet life’s demands - hypervigilance, hyper-independence and a harsh inner-critic. But these come at a cost. Their are high rates of burnout and exhaustion for those with ADHD.

This conversation explores a different way forward: understanding how your brain works, and learning how to work with it, rather than constantly pushing against it.

In this episode:

• How interest acts as the fuel for focus and executive function
• Why simple tasks can feel disproportionately hard to start
• How the brain creates stimulation when things feel boring
• Negative interest: why anxiety and urgency often become the default fuel
• The hidden coping systems (hypervigilance, masking, hyper-independence)
• The role of the inner critic
• The long-term cost: exhaustion, stress and burnout
• Internal vs external hyperactivity.
• ADHD and emotional intensity
• Spiky strengths: brilliant in some areas, challenged in others
• Practical ways to begin working with your ADHD brain, rather than against it
• The value of connection
• Identifying strengths, and using them to get activated

Guest: Alex Campbell ADHD Coach
Alex’s book ADHD… Now What? Is available here.

Resources:
VIA Character Strengths
ADHD NZ

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