SS 262: Why We Play With Others

SS 262: Why We Play With Others

When people consider exploring non-monogamy, we tell them to picture a pretty good but occasionally difficult relationship (ie, every relationship) and then picture it expanding exponentially because you've added more people. Eventually becoming a tesseract of interlocking and interconnected parts. Each of those parts, believe it or not, have a mind of their own. We've all been in moments where it seems insurmountable, where we acknowledge that this whole damned thing is just too hard and consider the days of monogamous yore. We discuss what pushes us to the edge, and what keeps us going, because playing with and loving others feels so fucking right.

Dylan starts the discussion with a personal update; Tonia feels isolated, not having people she feels she can talk to openly even when she's surrounded by friends contributes to that feeling. It's made her consider giving up this whole non-monogamy thing and it's left Dylan feeling useless since there's not a lot that Dylan can do to directly help. Dylan's feels guilt over some recent success and he hates the feeling that he's leaving her bind.

Cooper mentions that, acknowledging the negative feedback loop Tonia's in, that multiple partners bring a particular joy that we all seek, sexually and emotionally, Dylan explanabrags a bit but then admits that his #1 attraction to this lifestyle is that he no longer has to feel along, because he's part of this exclusive (but very inclusive) club. Ginger seals the point by stating that the relationship choices we make enrich our lives through the people we connect with, and that we bring that energy back to the relationships with those we've built a life with.

Ginger recommends a book, Open Marriage: A New Life Style for Couples, by Nena O'Neill.

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Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464). Find Cooper on Twitter @CooperSBeckett, Dylan on Twitter @DylanTheThomas, and Ginger on twitter @GingerNTheProf.

You can Cooper's novel about swinging, A Life Less Monogamous, at alifelessmonogamous.com or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at mylifeontheswingset.com as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook and if you buy them from his sites, use promo code SWINGSET to save 10%!

Today's podcast featured music by:

Anna Yvette & Laura Brehm - Summer Never Ends

Pegboard Nerds - Try This

Koven - Silence

Cooper S Beckett Ginger Bentham Dylan Thomas

Episoder(431)

SS 021: Bisexuality and You – Part 1

SS 021: Bisexuality and You – Part 1

In Life on the Swingset, The Podcast, Ep 21, we begin the big discussion about male and female bisexuality, crossing our way into pansexuality and omnisexuality and everything in between. We discuss the journey of the bisexual male, the evolution of acceptance (and hotness) of the bisexual female, the stereotypes and biases against both and the growing need for non-monogamy to be its own subclass

12 Nov 201035min

SS 020: The Sexual Costumes and Masks We Wear

SS 020: The Sexual Costumes and Masks We Wear

In Ep 20, we talk about how, even in open relationships, even as sex positive people, we often hide our true interests, feelings, ideas from playmates and our partner. We discuss why this might be as well as talk about moving beyond it. We also talk about fetishes and role playing. On this show: Cooper,

30 Okt 201059min

SS 019: Anal Sex & Double Penetration for the Non-Monogamous

SS 019: Anal Sex & Double Penetration for the Non-Monogamous

In Ep 19, we talk about anal sex and its place in non-monogamy, how it's often tokenized for significant other play only, the wonders and joys of double penetration, pegging, and male bisexuality. On this show: Cooper, Ginger, Dylan, Shira B.Katz, & Kendra Holliday (Formerly TBK) Show notes: Buy the Nexus Maximus, our favorite dual

16 Okt 201056min

SS 018: Blurring the Lines Between Polyamory and Swinging – Non Monogamy Cums Together

SS 018: Blurring the Lines Between Polyamory and Swinging – Non Monogamy Cums Together

In Ep 18, we invite two new friends onto the swingset for our discussion of the blurred line between polyamory and swinging. In this discussion we attempt to define the two terms and then break down our own definitions, we expand further with how we relate to friends and lovers. On this show: Cooper, Ginger,

4 Okt 201055min

SS 017: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas IV: The Final Chapter

SS 017: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas IV: The Final Chapter

In Ep 17, we bring it around with an all guys show for the final installment of our four part Lost Weekendesque bender, separating the girls and the guys and running them through a gauntlet of questions about swinging. For this episode, the guys, led by Cooper, answer questions put to them by the girls.  Up for

23 Sep 201027min

SS 016: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas III

SS 016: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas III

In Ep 16, we switch things up with an all girls show for the back half of our four part Lost Weekendesque bender, separating the girls and the guys and running them through a gauntlet of questions about swinging. For this episode, the girls, led by Ginger, answer questions put to them by the guys.  Up for

18 Sep 201042min

SS 015: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas II

SS 015: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas II

In Ep 15, we continue our four part Lost Weekendesque bender, separating the girls and the guys and running them through a gauntlet of questions about swinging. In the first two parts, the girls and guys answer the same questions and we jump back and forth between them. Up for discussion in this episode: "What are

11 Sep 201052min

SS 014: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas I

SS 014: Guys Have Penises, Girls Have Vaginas I

In Ep 14, we begin our four part Lost Weekendesque bender, separating the girls and the guys and running them through a gauntlet of questions about swinging. In the first two parts, the girls and guys answer the same questions and we jump back and forth between them. Up for discussion in this episode: "When

4 Sep 201052min

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