#39 Did I Manifest My Breakup? (Anxious Attachment & Dating Anxiety)

#39 Did I Manifest My Breakup? (Anxious Attachment & Dating Anxiety)

In this episode of The Breakup Debrief, we’re talking about a thought that so many people have after a relationship ends:

“Did I cause this?”
“Did I manifest the breakup?”

If you have an anxious attachment style, this will probably hit home.

We dive into how fear of abandonment, overthinking & constantly worrying about being left can impact how you show up in relationships and why that doesn’t mean you’re to blame for things ending.

Kelly breaks down the difference between:

  • Manifesting an outcome
  • And simply being stuck in a fight-or-flight state in your relationship

Because when you’re operating from fear, it can stop you from being your true self and that changes the dynamic entirely.

This episode is a mix of truth, reassurance, and a bit of tough love:
👉 You don’t need to perform to be loved
👉 You don’t need to earn your place in someone’s life
👉 And you cannot lose what is truly meant for you


🎯 What You’ll Learn

  • Why anxious attachment makes you fear abandonment
  • The truth about “manifesting” a breakup
  • How fear impacts your behaviour in relationships
  • Why not being yourself creates relationship anxiety
  • The vicious cycle of needing validation
  • Why dating should feel simple (even if it’s uncomfortable)
  • How to shift your mindset around rejection

Links & Resources

📧 Share your story for the “Where Is She Now?” segment: info@kellyskoaching.com

📲 Follow Kelly on Instagram & TikTok: @kellyskoaching

🔗 Explore all links & resources: Linktree

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Episoder(60)

#58 Why You Stayed in a Relationship That Wasn't Good For You & Why You Need to Stop Blaming Yourself

#58 Why You Stayed in a Relationship That Wasn't Good For You & Why You Need to Stop Blaming Yourself

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#57 When Your Partner Lies About Drugs- Lying, Betrayal & Social Pressure

#57 When Your Partner Lies About Drugs- Lying, Betrayal & Social Pressure

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#56 Holding a Grudge Against Your Ex Is Only Hurting You- Time to Let It Go

#56 Holding a Grudge Against Your Ex Is Only Hurting You- Time to Let It Go

You might hate Kelly a little during this episode, she's prepared for that, but she needs you to hear her out.This week Kelly is talking about the grudge. The anger you're still carrying. The flash of...

2 Aug 14min

#55 Who Is Kelly? Reintroducing Myself & The Breakup Debrief

#55 Who Is Kelly? Reintroducing Myself & The Breakup Debrief

If you're new here- welcome! Pull up a chair, grab your matcha & let Kelly tell you everything 🤭& if you've been here since the beginning, you might still want to listen to this one. Because over a y...

26 Jul 38min

#54 Healing From Lies in a Relationship- It's not your shame to carry

#54 Healing From Lies in a Relationship- It's not your shame to carry

Sometimes you're in a relationship & you know there are a lot of lies- you're wading through them, trying to make sense of them, trying to recover from them.And sometimes you go through a breakup & yo...

19 Jul 19min

#53 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.2)

#53 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.2)

He's back & this time he brought ChatGPT 😂Part 2 of the one year special with baby bro Ian is here & it does not disappoint. We pick up right where we left off, with Ian sharing how he coped in the e...

12 Jul 52min

#52 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.1)

#52 One Year of the Podcast; Kelly's Brother Tells All (P.1)

One year, 52 episodes & to celebrate Kelly's brought in her favourite guest- baby bro Ian 🎉This is the episode you didn't know you needed. Equal parts chaotic, hilarious, emotional & genuinely insigh...

5 Jul 43min

#51 Seeking Male Validation After a Breakup- Why We Do It & How to Stop

#51 Seeking Male Validation After a Breakup- Why We Do It & How to Stop

Okay, be honest. After your breakup, did you jump back on the apps not because you were ready to date, but because you just needed someone to find you attractive? Did you post that selfie & spend the ...

21 Jun 13min

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