Cressida Bonas on Grief That Doesn’t Go in a Straight Line

In this episode of Therapy Works, I sit down with Cressida Bonas for a conversation that feels unusually intimate and quietly brave. We talk about the loss of her older sister Pandora and how saying the word “died” still lands with a kind of shock and finality. Cressida shares what she didn’t expect about grief, the fear that lives in her body, the numb days that feel lonelier than tears, and the strange push pull of wanting to hold on while also wanting the suffering to end. We explore what it was like watching Pandora die in hospital, how her family tried to “be strong” and hide their tears until Pandora asked them not to, and why that shift towards honesty became a lesson in love and connection for all of them.We also talk about the way Cressida processes through creativity, writing a letter to Pandora in those final days and then finding herself unable to stop writing afterwards, not as memoir but through characters that could hold what felt unbearable. She reflects on motherhood, self doubt, and finding more confidence since having children, alongside the frustration of being put in a box by other people’s assumptions. We end with what Pandora’s death has clarified for her, the preciousness of ordinary moments, the desire to waste less time, and the meaning behind her podcast Lessons From Our Mothers, which grew out of recording her own mother’s story and the wish to understand the women who made us. Listen to Cressida’s Podcast, Lessons From Our Mothers: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/lessons-from-our-mothers/id1803569581 If Only If create beautifully made nightwear that feels thoughtful, timeless, and deeply comforting at the end of the day. Their pieces are designed to support women through every stage of life and are made from natural fabrics in small batches. If you’d like to explore their collection, you can visit ifonlyif.co.uk and use the code JULIA15 for 15% off. More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices