The Slow Build in Romantic Relationships

Everyone says they want a “slow build” in dating… right up until chemistry hits and judgement leaves the building.

In this off-the-cuff episode, we talk about why moving fast feels so intoxicating, what actually happens in your nervous system when you do, and how speed can quietly hijack discernment, attachment, and self-trust. We share personal stories, name the difference between excitement and regulation, and break down how slowing down isn’t about playing games, withholding sex, or killing the spark… it’s about letting something real have a chance to form.

If you’ve ever confused intensity for intimacy, this one’s for you.

Today's Hosts:

Matt Landsiedel
Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men

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Chapters

(00:00:00) - Gaiman Going Deeper: Slow Build In Relationships
(00:00:39) - What is the Slow Build?
(00:02:29) - How to Control the Pace of a Relationship
(00:02:50) - Falling In Love Too Fast
(00:05:57) - How To Manage Your Relationships
(00:07:43) - Why Do We Do This?
(00:11:06) - What Is A Healthy Pace For A Romantic Relationship?
(00:14:13) - What Happens to People Who Go Too Fast?
(00:15:13) - What is the Healthy Pace for a Romantic Relationship?
(00:17:01) - "We're Going Too Fast For My Own Natural System"
(00:19:23) - Knowledge Is Key to Secure Relationships
(00:23:01) - How To Slow Down Your Love Life
(00:25:02) - How To Control the Pace of Your Relationship
(00:29:48) - How To Manage Your Attachment Style
(00:30:56) - Podcast

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