Episode #4 feat. Bob Colaresi

What happens when a "messianic" doer—a man who prides himself on being "too proud to fail"—finally encounters the "restless emptiness" of his own soul?

In this fourth episode of Follow Me to the M-R-O-P!, host Brian Mueller sits down with Bob Colaresi for a deeply moving conversation about his 2005 initiation in the woods of Minnesota. Bob, a Carmelite priest for nearly 60 years, shares a vulnerable look at how the rites stripped away his "false self"—the tireless administrator and "fixer"—to reveal a man who is, above all else, the beloved of God.

Bob reflects on the unexpected power of the drum, the "threatening" beauty of nature, and a profound moment of healing involving the memory of his father. He recounts the "messianic" drive that fueled his early life and how the rites shifted his perspective from seeing people as projects to seeing them as brothers to be known and loved. Whether you are a "doer" looking for deeper meaning or someone wrestling with feelings of inadequacy, Bob’s story is a powerful testament to the transformative potential of stepping into the unknown.

Episode Highlights

• The "Restless Emptiness": Why a successful administrator and priest felt a void that work and success couldn't fill.
• The Power of the Drum: How a five-week labor of love from a spiritual director kept Bob from backing out.
• "Inadequate Son": The raw moment during a grief ritual that surfaced a lifelong wound.
• Healing the Father Wound: A mystical encounter in the woods that transformed a memory of high expectations into a realization of unconditional love.
• From Fixing to Listening: How the rites transformed Bob’s relationships, moving him from control to genuine presence.

Links & Resources

• Choosing Presence (Sponsor): https://choosingpresence.org
• Practicing Presence App: https://choosingpresence.org/app
• Illuman MROP page: https://illuman.org/mrop
• Adam's Return by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/3PzVESH
• Falling Upward by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/4uUM64P
• Breathing Under Water by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/47qLNVp
• Host: https://brianmueller.com

Credits

• First and foremost, thank you to Fr. Bob Colaresi for sharing his journey and his heart with us today.
• Thank you to Fr. Richard Rohr and the men of Illuman who have stewarded the Men’s Rites of Passage since 1996.
• Thank you to Jim Heaney and Jim Taylor for their dedication to Choosing Presence.

Music Credits:

• Slow Mo Dreams by Soundroll
• Becoming a Legend by Vens Adams