‘My mom cried and my dad went silent,’ says gay son of famed LDS composer | Episode 451

Jeff McLean grew up as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Heber City. As the son of renowned Latter-day Saint composer and playwright Michael McLean, faith and music were large parts of Jeff’s life.

From his earliest memories, Jeff recalls his father’s stardom and the expectations of being his son. But he never anticipated the struggle of trying to reconcile his faith and his sexuality.

After serving a church mission, entering a brief marriage to another man, and battling a drug addiction, Jeff finally gathered the courage to come home and confront the people he thought he had lost long ago: his parents.

His new book — co-written with his father, Michael, and therapist Brad Reedy, and titled “Stay in the Room: How a Gay Son and a Mormon Father Found Themselves and Each Other” — shares the insightful story of how this family found healing and common ground.

Told through three voices, the memoir shows the challenging facets of family life, fatherhood and faith.

Jeff shares how he found a place in life where he could express himself fully, all while feeling the love of God. Michael recounts how the Spirit led him to hold on to his son during his moments of pain. And Reedy offers insights for families navigating the tensions in faith, family and identity.

On this week’s show, Jeff and Michael McLean discuss the dynamic changes in their familial relationships, the impact of growing up Latter-day Saint as an LGBTQ+ individual, how parents can respond when their children’s identity challenges their beliefs, and what reconciliation really looks like.