My Queer Identity Story: Bisexual, Lesbian, Genderqueer, Graysexual . How I Stopped Thinking Something Was Wrong With Me

She thought something was wrong with her for decades. She was wrong about that.

In this episode the first in the Proud Love Series Dr. Jeni Wahlig tells her own identity story in full for the very first time: queerness, genderqueer identity, graysexuality, and polyamory. A doctorate in marriage and family therapy, fifteen years as a clinician, and she still spent twenty years cycling through labels that each held some of her and none of her fully.

In this episode you’ll hear:

• The moment Jeni lost her best friend at 16 and what she locked away because of it

• Years of thinking her body was broken, and the book (Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski) that finally named what was actually happening

• What graysexuality is, and how understanding it transformed her relationship with intimacy

• How she went from bisexual to lesbian to performing butch to performing femme and finally landing in genderqueer

• The moment on the Appalachian Trail that reassembled her entire understanding of attraction

• The teaching she wants every listener to take: identity is not a destination. It’s a living thing. You keep becoming.

Queer or not, this episode is for anyone who has ever thought something was wrong with them for who they are, who they’ve been, or who they’re still becoming.

This is episode two of our Proud Love series, where every June we center two-spirit and LGBTQIA+ voices, stories, and truths. If this conversation lands for you, share it with someone walking this road right now.

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