#38: MBT 1 on 1 Therapy > Between Caring for Others and Caring for Yoursel

🎙️ Special Episode – “Between Caring for Others and Caring for Yourself”

Welcome to this special episode of the MBT podcast.

In this episode, we once again step inside a one-on-one therapy session — a place where old patterns quietly reappear, especially in the moments when someone you deeply care about is struggling.

What unfolds in this session will feel familiar to many people.

Someone you love is hurting.

They feel disappointed.

Angry.

Overwhelmed.

And without even realizing it, all of your attention shifts toward them.

But what happens to you in that moment?

Today, we listen to a conversation that reveals how easily we can lose ourselves in taking care of someone else, while our own emotions slowly fade into the background.

And perhaps more importantly:

How do you care for someone you love without losing yourself in the process?

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🧠 What is central in this episode

When someone else’s emotions become your world

Sometimes another person’s pain naturally takes center stage.

You want to help.

You want to understand.

You want to make things better.

But while all your attention is focused outward, something important is happening within you.

And that can be much harder to notice.

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When the younger part of you comes alive again

A central theme in this episode is how old emotions can unexpectedly return.

Not through major conflicts.

But through quiet moments of feeling unseen, misunderstood, or emotionally disconnected.

It is often in these moments that old protective patterns quietly begin to take over.

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Caring as a survival strategy

This session explores how caring for others once became a way of creating safety.

Helping.

Fixing.

Adapting.

Doing everything possible to make someone else feel better.

But the question slowly emerges:

Is this still the healthiest way to respond today?

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What do I need?

As the conversation unfolds, the focus gradually shifts.

Not only:

What does the other person need?

But also:

What is happening inside me?

What do I need right now?

And am I allowed to make space for that, even when someone else is struggling?

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Making room for yourself

Real change is not always found in dramatic moments.

Sometimes it begins with something much smaller.

A boundary.

A choice.

A moment of rest.

Or simply recognizing that your own feelings deserve care as well.

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🌟 The common thread

The common thread in this episode is finding the balance between caring for others and caring for yourself.

How do you stay emotionally available for the people you love without losing yourself along the way?

Mentalizing helps create that balance.

By staying curious not only about the other person—

but also about yourself.

And by discovering that both can exist at the same time.

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💬 Closing

This episode reminds us that caring for others is something deeply valuable.

But it becomes truly healthy only when you do not lose yourself in the process.

The more you learn to listen to what is happening inside you, the more genuinely present you can be for someone else.

And sometimes change begins with one simple question:

“Can I be there for you… without leaving myself behind?”