#41 How to Deal with Childhood Wounds | With Galit Atlas

]Why can it feel easier to understand everyone else than to let yourself be known?

Eli Harwood joins psychoanalyst Dr. Galit Atlas to explore how childhood experiences can shape the ways we seek closeness, protect ourselves, and care for other people.

Drawing on Galit's book Come Closer, they focus on three of its six childhood patterns: the invisible child, the chosen child, and the ashamed child. Eli reflects on her own experiences as they discuss emotional caretaking, the pressure to keep a parent happy, and the pain of a parent who did not show up.

The conversation closes with a compassionate invitation: listen to the child you were without dismissing their experience, and seek support as you practice new ways of connecting.

In this conversation

• Galit describes how becoming hard to see can protect a child while making vulnerability difficult later.
• The chosen child learns to prioritize a parent's emotional needs; that responsibility can continue into adult relationships.
• Eli and Galit explore the difference between sharing your story with your child and asking your child to soothe you.
• They emphasize noticing your impact and making repairs when a conversation becomes too much.
• Shame can grow from many experiences, including rejection and neglect; it does not point to one specific childhood event.
• Galit invites listeners to approach their younger selves with curiosity, compassion, and support.

Guest and resources

Dr. Galit Atlas is a psychoanalyst and author. Learn more at her official website.

• Come Closer: Childhood Wounds, Adult Love, and the Secrets of Emotional Intimacy
• Galit on Instagram: @galit_atlas

Galit also discusses D. W. Winnicott's observation about hiding and being found. The interview does not establish the original publication source.

Connect

Learn more about the Secure Parenting Program.

• Attachment Nerd
• Eli on Instagram
• Eli on TikTok

Music by Gold Child.