Gossip Girl: You've Got Yale!

Spotted: Yale Day has arrived, and apparently getting into an Ivy League school is the least interesting thing happening at Constance. On this episode of Your One and Only Source, Caroline and Phoebe get into “You’ve Got Yale!”, where Blair is one B away from losing her mind, Serena gives up Yale without even telling anyone she wanted it, and Dan starts getting a little too interested in his sister’s new Shakespeare teacher. Sound familiar? We’re drawing some very uncomfortable parallels between Dan and Rachel Carr and the original Ezria, because apparently “inappropriate teacher-student relationship” is a genre this universe really loves.

And then there’s Serena, who immediately clicks with Rachel while simultaneously deciding that the noble thing to do is quietly sacrifice her own Yale dreams for Blair. Which naturally sends us into a Tell Me Lies spiral, because Serena and Lucy Albright clearly share a love of turning perfectly avoidable situations into opportunities to martyr themselves. Neither one can just make a decision without deciding they need to suffer for it first. Meanwhile, Blair gets her first B, launches a full-scale revenge campaign against Rachel, and discovers that humiliating your teacher can, unfortunately, have consequences. Who knew?

Plus, Chuck reluctantly teams up with Lily to take down Jack, Rufus and Lily make their very public couple debut at the opera, and Dan and Serena start wondering what happens when their parents’ relationship gets serious. Yale, betrayal, teacher crushes and some truly unnecessary self-sacrifice. Just another completely normal day on the Upper East Side. XOXO.

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