Why Do I Feel So Addicted? | S02E01

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We apologies for the sound quality of Season 1. As everyday people, we were still trying to find the best equipment to use. This does improve over the episodes.

In this episode we join Michael and Indy as they confess to their biggest crushes from the past. Indy liked a younger man in her office when she was a very busy executive. Michael was blown away by a blonde haired blue-eyed God one night at a pub. What was it about these crushes that felt so addictive? Indy discusses the phenomenon of limerence, which she encounters in her clinical practice as a psychologist. Limerence is typically experienced as a strong desire for another person who you are compelled to think about, and who you hope likes you too. Limerence also holds a mirror up and asks us, what does this attraction tell me about myself? In BDSM, limerence is heightened by mystery and limited contact. When Indy plays the dominant, she is only a particular part of herself in role. There is massive scope for limerence to kick in. We amplify the qualities of dominance or submission through the tone of our voice, language we use, what we wear - touching on archetypal forms. This leads to amplified limerence. At first we are captivated by the mystery but then we uncover more and can experience disappointment. Limerence is an acceptable part of being human, which can be enjoyed and understood. When you are in this obsessive state of yearning for someone, it can be helpful ask: Why am I so attracted to this person, and what does this tell me about my own life? Links: The Beautiful (BBC Radio: In Our Time): https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p003k9hf

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