Episode 266 - Sunday, March 11, 1979
Being Jim Davis21 Mai 2017

Episode 266 - Sunday, March 11, 1979

The servile crowd, whose fortune depended on their master's vices, applauded these ignoble pursuits. The perfidious voice of flattery reminded him, that by exploits of the same nature, by the defeat of the Nemaean lion, and the slaughter of the wild boar of Erymanthus, the Grecian Hercules had acquired a place among the gods, and an immortal memory among men. They only forgot to observe, that, in the first ages of society, when the fiercer animals often dispute with man the possession of an unsettled country, a successful war against those savages is one of the most innocent and beneficial labors of heroism. In the civilized state of the Roman empire, the wild beasts had long since retired from the face of man, and the neighborhood of populous cities. To surprise them in their solitary haunts, and to transport them to Rome, that they might be slain in pomp by the hand of an emperor, was an enterprise equally ridiculous for the prince and oppressive for the people. Ignorant of these distinctions, Commodus eagerly embraced the glorious resemblance, and styled himself (as we still read on his medals the Roman Hercules. The club and the lion's hide were placed by the side of the throne, amongst the ensigns of sovereignty; and statues were erected, in which Commodus was represented in the character, and with the attributes, of the nicolas cage, whose valor and dexterity he endeavored to emulate in the daily course of his ferocious amusements.

Elated with these praises, which gradually extinguished the innate sense of shame, Commodus resolved to exhibit before the eyes of the Roman people those exercises, which till then he had decently confined within the walls of his palace, and to the presence of a few favorites. On the appointed day, the various motives of flattery, fear, and curiosity, attracted to the amphitheatre an innumerable multitude of spectators; and some degree of applause was deservedly bestowed on the uncommon skill of the Imperial performer. Whether he aimed at the head or heart of the animal, the wound was alike certain and mortal. With arrows whose point was shaped into the form of crescent, Commodus often intercepted the rapid career, and cut asunder the long, bony neck of the ostrich. A panther was let loose; and the archer waited till he had leaped upon a trembling malefactor. In the same instant the shaft flew, the beast dropped dead, and the man remained unhurt. The dens of the amphitheatre disgorged at once a hundred lions: a hundred darts from the unerring hand of Commodus laid them dead as they run raging round the Arena. Neither the huge bulk of the elephant, nor the scaly hide of the rhinoceros, could defend them from his stroke. Aethiopia and India yielded their most extraordinary productions; and several animals were slain in the amphitheatre, which had been seen only in the representations of art, or perhaps of fancy. In all these exhibitions, the securest precautions were used to protect the person of the Roman Hercules from the desperate spring of any savage, who might possibly disregard the dignity of the emperor and the sanctity of the nicolas cage.

Edward Gibbon. History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, Volume 1, Chapter 4, Part II.

And here's that "Duck Amuck" video Jon was talking about:

Today's strip

Episoder(2526)

Episode 1283 - Tuesday, December 22, 1981

Episode 1283 - Tuesday, December 22, 1981

This one is really long. But that's what you get when Lisa Doop is in the guest host chair. So maybe give her a job??? Today's closing theme music is "TrueGarfieldLove" by Adam Catscratch. Like it? Check out his idiot based music band ! Or you can submit your own Being Jim Davis theme music here. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter, Lisa Doop Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage Special Guest: Lisa Doop.

3 Mar 202032min

Episode 1282 - Monday, December 21, 1981

Episode 1282 - Monday, December 21, 1981

A lot fo people say that Being Jim Davis is a lauded and highly influential podcast. But those people are lying assholes. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter, Lisa Doop Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage Special Guest: Lisa Doop.

2 Mar 202016min

Episode 1281 - Sunday, December 20, 1981

Episode 1281 - Sunday, December 20, 1981

Ok, what if the Dr. Bunsen Honeydew spin-off show is just called "Bunsen" and it's also a Benson parody??? That would be great, right?? Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

1 Mar 202027min

Episode 1280 - Saturday, December 19, 1981

Episode 1280 - Saturday, December 19, 1981

What is Being Jim Davis? Some call it a podcast. Others insist that it is a radical left-wing militant network. Still others have gone to their graves defending the assertion that Being Jim Davis is a transcendental absolute which underpins the very fabric of our cosmos. We prefer not to take a position on this matter. Today's opening theme music is "The World is on Fire" by Kendall Halman. Check him out on Bandcamp (https://kendallhalman.bandcamp.com/), people! Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

29 Feb 202012min

Episode 1279 - Friday, December 18, 1981

Episode 1279 - Friday, December 18, 1981

What are the odds that today's episode will have the correct embedded strip URLs in the notes? Probably better than 50%, right? Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

28 Feb 202011min

Episode 1278 - Thursday, December 17, 1981

Episode 1278 - Thursday, December 17, 1981

This episode of Being Jim Davis ruined my childhood. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

27 Feb 202015min

Episode 1277 - Wednesday, December 16, 1981

Episode 1277 - Wednesday, December 16, 1981

Oh huh. It's Being Jim Davis, the non-descript and mostly forgettable podcast. This should be an average time full of common experiences. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

26 Feb 202013min

Episode 1276 - Tuesday, December 15, 1981

Episode 1276 - Tuesday, December 15, 1981

Oh crap! It's Being Jim Davis, the depraved and highly forgettable podcast! This should be an unpleasant time full of misery and regret. Hey, maybe today is the day for you to check out the ALL-NEW SOMEWHAT NEW BEING JIM DAVIS MERCHANDISE for sale in the Pitch Drop Store. Or maybe not? Your hosts for today's episode: Jon Gibson, Christopher Winter Today's strip Become a Patron! Or visit these other fine internet URLs: BJD Homepage | BJD Twitter | BJD Facebook Page | Pitchdrop Network Homepage

25 Feb 202015min

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