E1: Origin Story - Mom Shaming

Moms Unschooled is the ultimate "momcast" where Erin and Sarah share perspectives on all the things - from the mundane to the magnificent- to inspire you to be you!

A podcast was born from conversations between moms in the midst of the “unprecedented times” of 2020. Erin and Sarah realized the discussions were deep-down more than just about covid and school choices, but about being moms and every day decisions; especially about how others’ perceptions impacted family choices. “We’re all in survival mode. Do we have a happy family? Do we have a healthy family? We’re winning.”-Erin

0:1:58

Do what’s right for you and your family and move towards “mothering as an experience.” The book Forget Having it All by Amy Westervelt, offers a perspective of breaking free from the forces that try to define what moms “should” do in American society and when shaming even starts (hint: it’s before women have their own children).

5:18

Shaming and guilt are different! Shaming=other people putting judgement on you. Guilt=judging ourselves in a negative light. Cultural norms create both lines of shaming and guilt. Ashamed=allowing guilt or shame to rule a part of your life and can result in our own reactions to changing what we do or how we react.

10:11

Shame comes as non-verbal judgements (like eyes rolling) and verbal confrontations from others. We bring our own perspectives and compare our own ideas to how others handle situations, but we don’t know what’s in that mom’s or child’s story leading to that moment.

14:55

Work from home vs. stay at home shaming is rampant from both sides, even with-in each group. Give other moms grace and learn from each other. Illegal shaming from employers has a lot of improving to do.

20:27

Social media shows only snapshots of one specific moment in time, often with the “rosy filter.” Share genuine and real, or don’t share at all. Use social media for ideas and information, but take ownership of your own reactions and comparison to what others post.

Resources shared in the show:

Forget “Having it All”: How America Messed Up Motherhood--and How to Fix It

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Who we are:

Erin and Sarah are moms who enjoy each other’s unique cul-de-sac “mom perspectives” so much they want to share their thoughtful and sassy ponderings with other moms around the world. Collectively they are moms to 4 school-aged kids, and world travelers in their journeys as United States Marine Corps spouses. Erin is a homeschooling mama of three munchkins who loves running (slower than most people walk), traveling, and can recite the alphabet backwards while opening a bottle of wine. Sarah is a curious minded mama of one small human, enjoys writing, takes forever to read a book for leisure, and can order McDonald's at a Japanese and German drive through.

Music from YouTube Audio Library [Aka YAL]

Music provided by RFM: https://youtu.be/Ia6NYheR8Eo