Queer Public9 Okt 2019

Friends with Exes

This week on the show I am pulling a story from the queer public archives. I recorded and released this content in 2015 and a ton of people downloaded it. It’s actually how I knew that people wanted more real-life queer life in their earbuds. Dani and Scott’s story was one of the first I reported on - but it’s remained entirely relevant.

You see, I’ve always been curious about what makes two people candidates for friendship after a breakup. My politics about staying friends with exes formed while I was a tiny liberal arts school in Quebec, barely out and with a very small friend circle of queer friends and lovers. I thought it was a no brainer, we stay friends with our exes because there weren’t that many of us queers around. But now that I live in a large city and not a tiny liberal arts school, I’m more critical of that concept because sometimes it’s not a good idea, sometimes people aren’t good for each other. Sometimes not enough time passes and it gets messy. But more often than not, a relationship without romance and intimacy is just a really solid friendship. That’s what we miss in a breakup. The companionship. The mutual support and respect. Someone to confide in. We miss having a teammate. I think Dani and Scott are the perfect example of that. This is Friends with Exes.

All the music you heard this episode is by them under their bandname Team Mate. You heard “Hi” “All heart” “Don’t let me let you go” and this song - called “Sequel” which chronicles their journey together.

Follow Teammate on Instagram and stream them now on Spotify and Apple Music.

This story was produced by me, Erin McGregor and the interview was edited by the multi-talented multimedia producer Andy Alseri.

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