106: A Serious Goku Move (The Second Book of Kings)
Apocrypals30 Okt 2022

106: A Serious Goku Move (The Second Book of Kings)

Welcome to Season 2 of Apocrypals, dear Theophiloi! You know, like how every podcast does 103 regular episodes and then takes an extremely planned break of several months before returning, refreshed and renewed? It happens all the time, and it's honestly weird that you haven't heard of it. Anyway, what better way to celebrate our return than with 2 Kings, a book that is more wildly violent than every Mortal Kombat put together. Join us for a story that has multiple people exploding, our second instance of a dude being whisked up to Heaven to hang out with God, and of course, the infamous Biblical murder bears. You're 39 in the hole, Elisha.

Topics of Discussion: A series of unfortunate events (no, really), Chris's brand-new Bible tattoo (no, REALLY), a bad look, bird poop economics, a death scene that leaves a truly perplexing quantity of body parts behind, a bold statement that might anger the "woke mob," Zedekiah's Bad Day, the Tingler.

Hymnal: "Two Kings" by Tenacious D, "Mamma Mia" by by Stephen Mann of English Martyrs Church (https://www.youtube.com/user/Principal45)

Offertory: As Enoch writes, "Whoever of you spends gold or silver for his brother's sake, he will receive ample treasure in the world to come." Support the show via http://ko-fi.com/apocrypals, or check out Official Apocrypals merchandise designed by Erica Henderson! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/apocrypals?ref_id=18246

Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives Matter. Heck 12. Isaiah 54:17

Episoder(126)

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68: Scent of a Jesus (The First, Second, and Third Apocryphal Apocalypses of John)

68: Scent of a Jesus (The First, Second, and Third Apocryphal Apocalypses of John)

Welcome to your Not-So-Dirty Thirties, Theophiloi! For as it is written, in the New Jerusalem, we will all be at the age where it's time to start thinking about getting an IRA, and realizing that we c...

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67: Bad Things to Call Your Mother (The Book of Bartholomew)

67: Bad Things to Call Your Mother (The Book of Bartholomew)

Having a bad day, Theophiloi? I mean, yes, of course you are, we all are in These Unprecedented Times. But hey, let's look on the bright side! At least angels aren't poking out your eyes, cutting out ...

28 Jun 20201h 27min

66: JeSuS With Two Cool Ses (The Acts of Thomas and his Wonderworking Skin)

66: JeSuS With Two Cool Ses (The Acts of Thomas and his Wonderworking Skin)

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14 Jun 20201h 17min

65: Adonai is Ichiban! (The Book of Deuteronomy)

65: Adonai is Ichiban! (The Book of Deuteronomy)

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3 Jun 20201h 51min

64: Spiritual Warfare Is Good, Actually (Bible Adventures and the Wisdom Tree catalogue)

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63: Wist Not To Whom Ne Whither (The Lives of St. Roche and St. Guinefort)

63: Wist Not To Whom Ne Whither (The Lives of St. Roche and St. Guinefort)

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62: Oh, the Jews' Manatees! (The Book of Numbers)

62: Oh, the Jews' Manatees! (The Book of Numbers)

One thing you have to say for the Book of Numbers, Theophiloi: it is exactly what it says in the title. Well, most of it is, anyway. Mixed in with all the census totals and step-by-step MapQuest direc...

19 Apr 20201h 37min

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