114. The Shame-Blame Trap

114. The Shame-Blame Trap

When you feel shame around having viewed pornography, blame is never far behind. Whether you blame yourself and experience more shame or you find someone else to blame for what you’re going through, this is a trap many of my clients are stuck in when they first come to me.


Start the work of escaping the shame-blame trap. I’m sharing why, even though it’s difficult to talk yourself out of shame, you can move through it with compassion for yourself, without resorting to blaming others.



Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.sarabrewer.com/blog/shame-blame-trap

Episoder(275)

250. The Compound Effect: Small Steps That Create Lasting Change

250. The Compound Effect: Small Steps That Create Lasting Change

Have you ever felt like you have to quit pornography perfectly or not at all? Many people fall into the trap of believing it’s all or nothing—total success or complete failure. This mindset creates pr...

3 Nov 202519min

249. Understanding and Healing the Two Sides of Shame with Kat

249. Understanding and Healing the Two Sides of Shame with Kat

Shame is one of the biggest barriers to change, but what if understanding where it comes from could help you finally release it? We often see shame as something that lives only inside of us, but it ac...

27 Okt 202520min

248. 4 Practical Steps to Develop Emotional Agility with Hunter

248. 4 Practical Steps to Develop Emotional Agility with Hunter

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by your emotions, like anger, anxiety, or sadness? We all experience powerful emotions, but the difference between getting stuck and moving forward often comes down to o...

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247. Changing Your Beliefs and Identity

247. Changing Your Beliefs and Identity

Have you ever wondered why your thoughts about yourself or pornography feel so automatic and unchangeable? So often we treat beliefs like facts, but many of the things we tell ourselves repeatedly are...

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246. How Being “Mr. Nice Guy” Is Keeping You Stuck with Jessica

246. How Being “Mr. Nice Guy” Is Keeping You Stuck with Jessica

Have you noticed that trying to be “Mr. Nice Guy” or constantly people-pleasing can actually keep you stuck? On the surface, it may look like kindness or keeping the peace, but prioritizing others’ ap...

6 Okt 202526min

245. Be the Observer: You Are Not Your Thoughts

245. Be the Observer: You Are Not Your Thoughts

Do you find yourself believing every thought your brain throws at you? Our brains are wired to keep us safe, which often means defaulting to negativity and imagining worst-case scenarios. These patter...

29 Sep 202513min

244. Healing the Self-Judgmental Voice with Kat

244. Healing the Self-Judgmental Voice with Kat

Do you find yourself stuck in a cycle of self-judgment, especially when dealing with pornography struggles? That critical voice in your head can feel like an unrelenting force, weakening you both ment...

22 Sep 202510min

243. Rebuilding Your Mindset and Confidence with Hunter

243. Rebuilding Your Mindset and Confidence with Hunter

Have you ever wondered why all your hard work to overcome pornography still leaves you stuck in the same patterns? Many people are primarily focusing on filters, routines, or counting days. They work ...

15 Sep 202514min

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