249: Tate Barkley – Moving Beyond The Chaos Of Your Past As A Gay Man

249: Tate Barkley – Moving Beyond The Chaos Of Your Past As A Gay Man

Imagine growing up in poverty and the only thing you really had in common with your Dad was that you were drinking buddies! Now imagine you stepped beyond that chaotic past, the repression of it all, and found a group of people - the queer community - who gave you the power to accept yourself. That's where you released the resentment, discovered gratitude and humility. Tate Barkley, shares his story and his new book Sunday Dinners, Moonshine, and Men. About Tate Tate Barkley is a speaker, author, educator, a 30-year practicing attorney and a founding partner of Bain & Barkley law firm in Houston, Texas. He is a graduate of the University of Texas and South Texas College of Law. In addition to his active law practice, he spent 20 years as an adjunct professor at the University of Houston, teaching Communications Law and Ethics, where he was awarded the School of Communications 2019 Valenti Award for Outstanding Teaching by a Lecturer. Tate’s 24 year recovery journey has compelled him to write and speak about personal integrity, ethics, shame, self-acceptance, mental wellness, and resilience. His story demonstrates how shame and addiction can disrupt lives, businesses and institutions. He then shares the tools that have enabled him to embrace self-honesty and service to others as a means to long-term personal growth and resiliency. Tate’s energy, self-deprecation and sincerity provide a thoughtful and uplifting experience for his audiences. His forthcoming memoir, Sunday Dinners, Moonshine, and Men, to be published in September 2023, recounts Tate’s troubled relationship with his father and his journey to overcome his shame and the scarcity mindset that fueled his addictions and blocked his ability to find peace in his life. Tate offers readers a deeply personal account of his dysfunctional childhood, from the backwoods of North Carolina, to his family’s struggles with poverty in Central Florida, and their ultimate move to the boomtown of 1970s Houston, Texas. He details his attempts to control his escalating drinking and repress his sexuality as he became a successful attorney, only to hit rock bottom and lose it all. Tate’s story will resonate with readers as they follow his quest to accept himself and find peace. Tate presently serves as President of the Board of Directors for Avenue Community Development Corp. in Houston, which is dedicated to providing affordable housing for veterans, seniors, and the working poor. He also serves on the board of the church council for Covenant Church, an ecumenical liberal Baptist congregation in Houston’s museum district. Tate is a past board member of the Texas Council for Advising and Planning for the Prevention and Treatment of Mental and Substance Abuse Disorders, and he formerly served on the Fort Bend Regional Council on Substance Abuse board, whose mission is to provide families and individuals the substance abuse prevention, education, and treatment services needed for positive change for themselves and the community. He resides in Houston, Texas with his husband of six years, Anson, and their dog, Emerson. Connect With Tate Website Facebook Instagram LinkedIn Join Our Live 40 Plus Gay Men, Gay Talk Chats The third Monday of each month at 5:00 p.m. Pacific, we gather together on a zoom chat to talk about the stuff us gay gays aren't talking about but should - careers, finances, sex, love, health, coming out - all that stuff that we think we're talking about but aren't. It's fun, it builds community, and you never know when you just might make a great connection or a friend. Click Here To Join The Calls! You can also listen to the podcast on…

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Episoder(300)

Steven C. Law Spent 45 Years Loving the Same Man. Here Is What He Wants Gay Men Over 40 to Know.

Steven C. Law Spent 45 Years Loving the Same Man. Here Is What He Wants Gay Men Over 40 to Know.

Most gay men were never shown what lasting love actually looks like. Steven C. Law lived it for 45 years and then wrote a book to make sure nobody forgets what it cost to love freely before the world ...

19 Jun 45min

Katherine Wela Bogen on What Gay Men Get Wrong About Bisexuality and Why It Costs All of Them

Katherine Wela Bogen on What Gay Men Get Wrong About Bisexuality and Why It Costs All of Them

Gay men know what it cost to come out. Bisexual people paid that same price and then got rejected by the community that was supposed to finally understand. Katherine Wela Bogen is a doctoral candidate...

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He Was HIV Positive and Ran Toward Ground Zero Anyway: Neil Adams on Michael Dorian and the Story That Would Not Stay Untold

He Was HIV Positive and Ran Toward Ground Zero Anyway: Neil Adams on Michael Dorian and the Story That Would Not Stay Untold

On September 11, 2001, a gay man living with HIV made a decision that had nothing to do with self-preservation. He ran toward the World Trade Center and spent 24 hours in the pile. Neil Adams met Mich...

5 Jun 48min

HIV Is Not Over: Andrew Spieldenner and Alex Garner on Stigma, Survival, and What Gay Men Over 40 Need to Hear

HIV Is Not Over: Andrew Spieldenner and Alex Garner on Stigma, Survival, and What Gay Men Over 40 Need to Hear

You lived through it. You lost people. And somewhere along the way you decided HIV was somebody else's problem now. It is not. Andrew Spieldenner and Alex Garner from MPact Global Action join Rick for...

29 Mai 47min

Morgan Rich Says the Version of Masculinity You Were Handed Was Never Going to Fit. Here Is What Does.

Morgan Rich Says the Version of Masculinity You Were Handed Was Never Going to Fit. Here Is What Does.

Most men were handed a version of masculinity that had no room for grief, sensitivity, or showing up as anything other than hard. Gay men got that version and then got told their masculinity did not c...

22 Mai 44min

Randy Jones Has Been Gay for 30 Years and Still Asks Himself If He Is Gay Enough

Randy Jones Has Been Gay for 30 Years and Still Asks Himself If He Is Gay Enough

Thirty years with the same man. Kids. A suburban life. A career built on celebrating the best in people. And a question that never fully goes away: am I gay enough? Randy Jones, speaker, author, pod...

15 Mai 43min

Jeff Nally Lost His Husband Without Warning. Here Is What Nobody Tells You About Being a Gay Widower.

Jeff Nally Lost His Husband Without Warning. Here Is What Nobody Tells You About Being a Gay Widower.

Nobody hands you a roadmap when your husband dies. Jeff Nally knows that firsthand. Sixteen months after losing Bob unexpectedly to a brain hemorrhage, the executive coach, professional speaker, and f...

8 Mai 34min

Corporate Rejected Joseph Federico. He Said Fine And Bet On Himself!

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Most gay men know they are meant for something more than the corporate box they squeezed themselves into. Getting out is another story entirely. Joseph Federico, The Marketing Maven and founder of JFe...

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