48: The First 3 Steps to Opening Your Relationship (Without Crashing It)

You know that feeling when you get a new car? It’s shiny, exciting, full of possibilities—and your imagination runs wild. But then reality hits: taxes, car payments, insurance, maintenance… and suddenly, the fantasy doesn’t quite match the day-to-day.

Opening up a monogamous relationship can feel the same way. The excitement of exploring non-monogamy can cause folx to skip over some crucial steps—only to find themselves overwhelmed or unprepared.

In this episode, we break down three essential things to do before (or even after) you start dating others:

1. Determine your ideal relationship style, what you value, and your personal boundariesGet clear on what works for you based on your needs for emotional and sexual exclusivity, your core values, and the limits that help you feel secure.

2. Have essential conversations with your partner(s)Talk about what you each want, share boundaries, co-create what works for you as a unit, and build a Values-Based Agreement™ to guide you forward.

3. Check in regularly and revisit your agreementsKeep communication open and honest as things evolve. Your relationship is a living thing—it needs maintenance to thrive.

Whether you're just beginning your journey or already navigating the waves of non-monogamy, these steps can help prevent common pitfalls and keep your connection strong.

Think of our Poly Newbies Digital Course as the “insurance policy” for your open relationship journey. And if you’ve already hit a few bumps in the road, it’s the perfect tune-up to get you back on track. Find out more here - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer

🎧 Related episodes to check out next:

• How We Love: What Style of Non-Monogamy is For Me? - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2wQiiMrHCFltYorI7bdEGs?si=3DfvnJG9StK_3Pnmo6kq_g

• Pardon Me But You're Stepping on my Boundaries - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2WMeYiXfpLXqYLrJbGlG7S?si=APZQLOTPQ2-wOqseXMDi3Q

• How to Start in Polyamory and Not Totally Suck at It - https://open.spotify.com/episode/7F9IsYAqghAgxdd86i60s9?si=raAvjd37QeuBQw-UfB6l6g

Show Resources:

• Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠
• Looking for sex+ psychotherapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at ⁠andreturcottepsych@gmail.com⁠
• Looking for poly-friendly coaching support? Book a complimentary consultation call with co-host Tara - ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠
• Book by Dr. Liz Powell - Building Open Relationships - https://drlizpowell.com/buildingopenrelationshipsbook/
• Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the polyamory words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠