Why People-Pleasing Makes You Lose Yourself (And How to Get Back)

Why People-Pleasing Makes You Lose Yourself (And How to Get Back)

Why do we keep ending up in toxic relationships — even when we know better? ⁠Buy the book Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back ⁠ In this powerful conversation, Kwame Christian sits down with psychologist and trauma therapist Dr. Ingrid Clayton to explore the hidden reason behind this pattern: the fawning trauma response. Ingrid shares how complex trauma rewires the nervous system, why simply “setting boundaries” often doesn’t work, and how shame keeps us stuck in cycles of people-pleasing. Together, they unpack the science of safety, what it really takes to break free, and why healing is less about quick tips and more about reconnecting with yourself. If you’ve ever wondered why saying “no” feels impossible — or why you’re drawn to the very relationships that hurt you — this episode will change how you see yourself and your story. Connect with Ingrid BOOK: FAWNING: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE: https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3PvWTgJMirURfgHWj3h28g WEBSITE: https://www.ingridclayton.com/ Discount code "KWAME" gives 30% discount over 3 months TL;DR what is folk? folk is a CRM, and extension, that helps businesses build real relationships and close deals. Why is folk better? folk is simple, integrated, and proactive to use. folk’s value proposition? folk CRM does the busy work for you, so you can focus on growing your service business. folk’s tagline folk, like the sales assistant your team never had What product details will most excite your audience? • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Our seamless integrations with social channels⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Our 1-click Enrichment that finds contact details for y⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠ou⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Know the best leads to reach out to with AI Follow-up⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠s⁠⁠⁠⁠ Useful links & resources •⁠⁠⁠⁠ folk's website⁠⁠⁠⁠ •⁠⁠⁠⁠ folk's Linkedin⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠Simo, our CEO’s, LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠ • ⁠⁠⁠⁠folk's Youtube⁠⁠⁠ Contact ANI ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠negotiateanything.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!⁠

Episoder(1771)

Elite Negotiators Read Your Body Before You Speak — Here’s How

Elite Negotiators Read Your Body Before You Speak — Here’s How

Think you’re in control of what you’re saying? Think again. Before you utter a single word, elite negotiators are already reading you — through your posture, your gestures, your tone, your tension. In...

4 Jul 202531min

Why Deep Listening Is the Most Persuasive Thing You Can Do

Why Deep Listening Is the Most Persuasive Thing You Can Do

What if the key to changing someone’s mind isn’t speaking louder—but listening deeper? Buy the Book: ⁠Deep Listening: Transform Your Relationships with Family, Friends and Foes - by Emily Kasriel⁠ ...

3 Jul 20251h 3min

Vulnerability Can Destroy You… or Make You a Great Leader

Vulnerability Can Destroy You… or Make You a Great Leader

Is vulnerability at work a strength… or a trap? In this eye-opening conversation, best-selling author and leadership expert Jacob Morgan challenges the modern myth of vulnerability in the workplace. ...

2 Jul 202532min

What It Actually Takes to Be the Leader People Remember

What It Actually Takes to Be the Leader People Remember

Most leaders focus on results. The best ones focus on people. In this powerful conversation, Kwame Christian sits down with legendary leadership expert Mark Miller — a man who spent over four decades...

1 Jul 202534min

How to Build Trust—Even with People Who Don’t Trust Anyone

How to Build Trust—Even with People Who Don’t Trust Anyone

What is trust, really? In this special LinkedIn Live edition of Negotiate Anything, Kwame Christian breaks down the psychology behind trust—and why it’s so easy to lose but so hard to rebuild. Drawing...

30 Jun 202538min

What People Expect—But Never Tell You

What People Expect—But Never Tell You

Most conversations fail before they even begin—because nobody sets the rules. In this episode, Kwame Christian sits down with Lewis VanLandingham from Sandler Training to uncover the hidden dynamics b...

29 Jun 202542min

Being Right Isn’t Enough. Learn Why They Ignore You

Being Right Isn’t Enough. Learn Why They Ignore You

You’ve been there—armed with facts, logic, and the truth. And still, they shut down. They argue. They walk away. Why? In this episode, Kwame Christian speaks with Carlos Alvarenga, a persuasion expert...

28 Jun 202533min

Stop Building a Business—Start Building a Movement

Stop Building a Business—Start Building a Movement

Brian Gottlieb and Kwame Christian delve into the seamless integration of business strategy with community impact through innovative initiatives like "Windows for a Cause" and "Baths for the Brave." T...

27 Jun 202533min

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