A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- It can be difficult to grasp how much power of persuasion we actually have, or how to wield it wisely.  In today’s episode we look at science-based strategies for observing the effect we have on others, and how to better deal with our fear of rejection, and asking for favors.  Vanessa Bohns is a social psychologist and a professor of organizational behavior at Cornell University. She is the author of You Have More Influence Than You Think: How We Underestimate Our Power of Persuasion, and Why it Matters. In this episode we talk about: How much we often underestimate our own influence  Why it’s so hard to say no Why people are paying attention to us more than we think The impact of asking for things in-person The responsibility that comes with being in a position of power What it means to experience your own influence  And how we can be more aware of the influence we have Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/vanessa-bohns-550

18 Jan 20231h 4min

We're sharing a preview of another podcast we love, The Happiness Lab. On The Happiness Lab, Dr. Laurie Santos explores all the ways we get our happiness wrong and what we can to do really feel better. She walks through the latest evidence-based strategies for improving your mental health, sharing practical advice on what will really bring more joy. In her latest New Year season of The Happiness Lab, Laurie tackles how to listen to the inner voice of what we really need in the new year. We're often looking into the future... hunting for the "next big thing." We can get so fixated with these events and the happiness we hope they'll deliver, that we forget to look for joy right now. Actor and author Tony Hale (Veep, The Mysterious Benedict Society, Arrested Development) joins Laurie to discuss how he was always chasing new accomplishments, until he realized he was missing the chance to be happy living in the moment. You can hear more from The Happiness Lab at https://podcasts.pushkin.fm/thls6?sid=tph/.

16 Jan 202337min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Today’s guest is the man in charge of the world’s longest scientific study of happiness, a study that has been running since 1938.  Dr. Robert Waldinger is a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development at Massachusetts General Hospital, and co-founder of the Lifespan Research Foundation. He is also a Zen master and teaches meditation in New England and around the world. His TED Talk is one of the most viewed of all time, with over 43 million views. He’s the co-author, along with Dr. Marc Schulz, of The Good Life. In this episode we talk about:  What the Harvard Study of Adult Development is and how it got started How much of our happiness is really under our control Why you can’t you be happy all the time The concept of “social fitness”  Why you should “never worry alone”  How having best friends at work can make you more productive And why, in his words, it’s never too late to be happy Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/robert-waldinger-549

16 Jan 20231h 2min

When we think about Buddhism or the dharma, we probably don’t think about money.  But when the Buddha laid out guidelines about how to make an ethical livelihood, this didn’t preclude material success. This episode is part two of this week’s series on money, and dives into how we can bring Buddhist principles to an area of our lives that can create so much fear, greed, and dread.  Spencer Sherman is the founding CEO of Abacus, a values-driven financial firm, and certified mindfulness teacher.  He teaches the Fearless Finance program and The Mastery of Money program for NYU’s Inner MBA program.  He is also the author of The Cure For Money Madness. In this episode we talk about:  How to identify and reframe our potentially harmful beliefs about money How to apply the Four Brahma Viharas to having a healthier relationship with our finances How to use the RAIN technique when we become anxious about money Spencer’s ‘Enough Practice’ designed to give us a sense of equanimity  How generosity helps us let go and can create a sense of abundance  How mindfulness of money can key us into interconnection And whether you can actually be a successful investor if you’re guided by Buddhist values Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/spencer-sherman-544

11 Jan 20231h 11min

Money is often a messy and complicated topic that provokes a lot of anxiety.  Today’s show is the first episode of a two-part series on managing our relationship to money and understanding what role money really plays when it comes to our happiness.  Morgan Housel is the author of The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed, and Happiness. Translated into over 50 languages with over two million copies sold, Housel is a two-time winner of the Best in Business Award from the Society of American Business Editors and Writers, winner of the New York Times Sidney Award, and a two-time finalist for the Gerald Loeb Award for Distinguished Business and Financial Journalism.  In this conversation we talk about:  The difference between happiness and contentment The difference between being rich and being wealthy The elusive but crucial concept of “enough” The importance of not moving the goalposts when it comes to enough-ness Why financial success is more about behavior than intelligence How our lived experiences impact our perspectives on money  Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/morgan-housel-543

9 Jan 20231h 14min

What is the Dalai Lama’s own meditation practice like? In this final episode, the Dalai Lama goes into great detail about the whys and wherefores of meditation, taking us way into the deep end. We cover single-pointed versus analytical meditation, gross and subtle levels of the mind, “true cessation,” and how we can use sleep as practice for the moment of death. Dr. Davidson returns to explain key, esoteric terms and to help us understand how we can apply elements of the Dalai Lama’s practice to our everyday lives. Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Show Notes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-542 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations Thukdam Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

6 Jan 202344min

One of the Dalai Lama‘s most challenging teachings, especially for secular western minds, is reincarnation. In this episode, His Holiness describes the Buddhist deity who he believes to be his “boss.” Dan then sits down with Richie again to discuss whether there is any scientific evidence for rebirth. The episode begins and ends with emotional moments, where members of our team respond with tears to being in the presence of the Dalai Lama. Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Show Notes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-541 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations UVA research on reincarnation Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

5 Jan 202333min

How can we get better at selfishness? That’s one of many fascinating topics we cover in this episode, in which we play snippets from Dan’s one-on-one interview with His Holiness, and then unpack it all with Dr. Richard Davidson, neuroscientist and founder of the Center for Healthy Minds. We talk to His Holiness about “wise selfishness,” how to handle our enemies, and whether he ever gets angry. Then Richie recounts a time when His Holiness exhibited a rare flash of anger— towards him, in fact. Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-540 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

4 Jan 202333min