S2 Ep. 16: My Husband Only Wants Anal Sex, My partner Was a Virgin, and Is It The Kiss of Death if We Sleep in Separate Beds?
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) When my husband and I met in our early 40’s, we had a lot of sex that was fairly vanilla but very passionate. Over time, the frequency has decreased. I don’t like being the initiator so there’s not been much I can do to have sex more other than be incredibly enthusiastic when he does want it. The problem is that, over time, he’s become more interested in anal sex than vaginal sex. Having things put in my butt does not arouse me at all, but now it seems to be all he wants and all he can get off on. I wonder if he’s watching tons of anal porn and this has somehow taken over his erotic life. I don’t want to discourage sex or demand he desires things he doesn’t, but I desperately miss regular sex. How can I get him interested again?2) My husband and I have been together for over 20 years and recently we have been in a bit of a slump. He was a virgin before he met me and I was not. He recently told me that he is a bit envious that I had experience before we got together. He only said it to me once but I worry that he feels that he's missed out. How can I help him through this? I trust him and know that cheating is not an issue.3) Sadly for my wife, I’ve started to snore as I age. This means she has badly disturbed nights. We are lucky, we have a solution: a spare room. I do sleep there every now and then to give her a break. But my snoring is so bad, I fear I might have to move into the spare room permanently. If I do this, is it the start of a slippery slope? Might our really great relationship start to suffer? We have a good sex life, usually enjoying it in the mornings, so I can readily slip back into the marital bed for a romp, or even invite my wife round to mine. Do you think it’s a problem? And offers her sex tip of the week!Purchase SexTok with Zibby and Tracey merch here: https://www.bonfire.com/store/zibby-owens/To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
26 Apr 202224min
S2 Ep. 15: Sex with a Much Older Man, Nipple-Biting, and Why has a Death Made Me Horny?
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) I’m a 35-year-old woman who has fallen in love with a much older man: he’s 60. At the moment, the age difference isn’t that apparent because he looks and acts much younger than his years. But I am worried about sex because it’s a big part of our relationship. How long can a man keep getting erections? Is there an age when he will stop wanting to have sex with me?2) I’ve been with my wife for 25 years, and recently she asked me - no, TOLD me - to bite her nipples, HARD. I did, and she kept saying to bite harder. I was afraid of breaking the skin. How common is this? Why has it never come up before? I sort of understand, because there have been times when I have wanted her to squeeze my testicles, and probably with a lot more force than one might think would be comfortable. Is this the same phenomena, sort of?3) My mother died suddenly a few months ago and for some reason, it’s reignited my very lazy sex drive. I’ve gone from trying to avoid sex to trying to have it as much as I possibly can. I felt terrible at first - like it was disrespectful. But it was the only time I could escape the awful feeling of loss and grief. Is this normal? Does it happen to other people, too? And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
19 Apr 202227min
S2 Ep. 14: Cross-Dressing, Jealous Rages, and How to Make Sex Work When You’re Different Heights
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) I am a happily married man who likes wearing women’s underwear under my clothes. I buy the items secretly and my wife has no idea I do this: it’s remarkably easy to get away with if you think things through. I’ve been doing this from when I was very small and never told anyone about it in my life. It doesn’t interfere with my relationships but I would dearly love not to have to hide it and to share this indulgence with my wife. I have two questions: would you consider this a fetish and should I tell her?2) Tracey, I am like you often describe yourself when you were younger – namely very jealous of everything. Real women, porn, fantasies, thoughts…I would like to control everything. It makes me (and all of my partners – including the one I am with now) go crazy. What can I do about it? I tried different kinds of psychotherapy but I am still going nuts, very often. How did you find your way out of this horror? 3) My husband and I are very different heights. I am 5'5" and my husband is 6'5". We have been together for almost 25 years now and have had some ups and downs, but we have recently found each other again. We are both very adventurous during sex and really enjoy each other. We both would like to have him bend me over and take me or have sex standing up. The problem is our height. Even shower sex is out. The angle just isn't right and it becomes quite funny when we try. Do you have any ideas on how to solve these problems? And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
12 Apr 202233min
S2 Ep. 13: Sex Giggles, Sex Dreams, and How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is Secretly Gay
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) Sometimes when I’m in bed with my husband, I start laughing. He gets all huffy about it which makes me laugh even more. I have no idea why I do it or how to stop.2) I’m very happy with my partner of 12 years but I dream of sex with other men nearly every night. I love the dreams: they’re exciting and fun though I do feel guilty when I wake up. I sometimes wonder if this means I’d be up for cheating if someone made a move on me. I’m in my mid 40s and don’t get hit on very often. The dreams make me not trust myself: I’d like to think I’d say no, but would I? 3) Can you tell if a man is secretly gay or has bisexual tendencies? I have met a man I’m really into, but my instincts tell me something is wrong. He is curiously uninterested in having sex – especially since our relationship is new. I am always the instigator. When we do have sex, he won’t make eye contact and he cuts straight to intercourse. He doesn’t enjoy foreplay at all: there’s no interest in my breasts, he never fingers me and says he doesn’t like performing oral sex. Out of bed, he’s great and very affectionate. Though, now I think about it, he’s not into deep kissing either. Otherwise, he’s a great boyfriend and I’d like us to get serious. Am I being over paranoid? Should I ask him outright? And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
5 Apr 202221min
S2 Ep. 12: My Partner Won't Listen to What I Want in Bed, my Boyfriend's Still on Tinder, and Is There Really Such a Thing as an Aphrodisiac?
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) Is there such a thing as an aphrodisiac? Oysters, chocolate, things like that? I suspect the answer is no but I’m curious if things like ‘Spanish Fly’ ever did work?2) I have no problems asking for what I want in bed but I feel like I’m talking to myself with my new partner. It’s not easy for me to orgasm because I need very specific stimulation. (I’m a gay man, by the way, so it’s not true that all men can orgasm without issues.) I’ve explained what I need done to my boyfriend many, many times yet he still doesn’t do it. What do I do now?3) I met my partner on Tinder and, once I decided I really liked him, took myself off all the dating apps. I thought he had done the same and got a shock when I looked to see he’s still on there and was active recently. We’ve been seeing each other a month and it’s really full on. What does this mean and how do I deal with it? And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
29 Mar 202223min
S2 Ep. 11: I Don't Like How My Vulva Looks, My Friends Can't Forgive His Affair, and How to Use a Butt Plug
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) I’m embarrassed about the way my vulva looks. My inner labia lips protrude and look ugly. I’ve watched porn and, for most women, the inner lips sit inside the outer lips. It makes me very nervous about sex with someone new. Is this normal?2) A year ago, my partner had an affair. We have a close group of friends, so everyone knows about it. But we’ve worked things out, I’ve forgiven him and we are back on track. The problem is our friends haven’t done the same. I feel judged by them and am constantly having to defend my decision to take him back. How do I get them to move on, like I have?3) Tracey, you often talk about using a butt plug during sex. We’ve never used one before. Can you explain, for beginners, how to use one and what type to buy? And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
22 Mar 202220min
S2 Ep. 10: Working from Home Porn Addiction, Crushes on Other Men, and What to Do When You’re Married but Haven’t Had Sex in Years
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) I’m no prude and have nothing against people watching porn but I am alarmed by the amount of time my boyfriend now spends watching it on his phone. We both work from home and it’s ramped up since then. He thinks it’s funny when I catch him and doesn’t try to hide it. But it’s starting to bug me, looking over and seeing women doing degrading things to men for hours each day. Am I over-reacting? 2) I’m happily married but have a crush on one of the dads I see on the school run. We have a chat and a laugh and now and then go for a coffee. Nothing is going to happen — I’ve had crushes before and they just fade out over time — but I’m curious if this happens to other married women. How do other people handle it? Is it something I should tell my partner and have a laugh about? Or should it stay a secret? What does it say about my marriage?3) I married my wife three years ago after being together for five years. She’s never been that interested in sex but now we don’t have sex at all. It stopped when we got married. We’re in our late 30s and our kids are now at school. I love her but I’m not prepared to never have sex again. She refuses to talk about it. And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
15 Mar 202223min
S2 Ep. 9: Intercourse Orgasms, Should You Confess an Affair You Got Away With, and How to Talk Yourself into Wanting Sex
In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:1) I can’t climax during intercourse and it frustrates me. I know I’m not the only one and I know why I’m not able to orgasm but surely there are things I can try other than him using his fingers or holding a vibrator there? 2) My 8-year relationship went through a bad patch and I had a brief fling with a woman at work. It’s all over, no one ever found out, and my relationship is back on track. It happened six months ago but I still feel jumpy and nervous about it. Should I come clean or keep quiet?3) I’m 29, a straight woman, and I’d describe my libido as low to average. It's not that I don’t enjoy having sex with my partner, it’s just not my favorite thing to do. I do feel close to him afterward though and I know it makes him happy. So my question is this: how can I talk myself into wanting sex when I don’t really feel like it? And offers her sex tip of the week!To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUTracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
8 Mar 202221min
