The Dildorks

We sat down with therapist and educator Aida Manduley to discuss the psychological model known as attachment theory – how it works, why it matters, and (of course) how it relates to non-monogamy and kink! What Is Attachment Theory? | Insecure | Secure | Anxious-Preoccupied | Dismissive-Avoidant | Fearful-Avoidant | Caveats | Childhood | Abuse | What to Work On | Distress Tolerance | Different Manifestations | Becoming Secure | Feelings | Silence | How to Say No | Emergencies | Non-Monogamy | Kink | Bragging | Reinforcement | Context Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

22 Okt 20191h 8min

In preparation for Bex’s long-awaited top surgery, we had a conversation about his reasons for getting it, what he’s been doing to get ready for it, and what he thinks will happen during recovery and beyond. Time Travel | Rude Questions | What Is It? | Deciding | Process | Risks | Fears | Pain | Recovery | Depression | Regrets | Saying Goodbye | Chest Hair | Looking Forward | Sex | Friends & Partners | Advice | Thirst Traps Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

15 Okt 201948min

This week rounds out our 3-part series on breakups! We’re addressing some awkward post-split situations, like reclaiming your possessions, saying goodbye to your ex’s family, and dealing with passive-aggressive tweetstorms. Getting Back Your Stuff | Impulsive Breakups | Taking a Break | Close Quarters | New Dates | Harping On | Friends & Family | Subtweets Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

8 Okt 201950min

We had more to say about breakups, so here’s another episode about the ends of relationships!Grammar/Gender Rebel | Rebounds | Staying Friends | Small Talk | Best Breakup | Pre-Negotiation | Friend Breakups | Poly Breakups | Supporting Partners | D/s Breakups Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

1 Okt 20191h 3min

How did it take us this long to do an episode about breakups? This week we’re discussing some of our worst splits, how we think they should be done, and what should happen afterward.Which One Is Harder? | First Breakup | Text vs. In Person | Long-Distance | Teenage Bullshit | When Is It Time? | Downleveling | Clarity | Reasons | Safety | Location | Post-Breakup Conversations | Getting Better | Uncertainty | Grief | Time Heals All Wounds | Trauma | Attachment | Distraction vs. Processing | TV Marathons | Rorschach | Crying Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

24 Sep 20191h 7min

This week we’re interviewing Dr. Liz Powell, psychologist, speaker, and author of our favorite book on non-monogamy, Building Open Relationships. We touch on polyamory struggles, love as a verb, and creating the relationships you want, among other things! Building Open Relationships | Jealousy | Desire-Based Approach | Breaking Up | Downleveling | Hierarchy | Flexibility | Boundaries | Perfect Poly | Fucking Up | Monogamy Mindset Hangovers | Soulmates | Real Love | Transference Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

17 Sep 20191h 3min

Truth or dare? We DARE you to join us this week for a discussion of sex games: different types, ways to play them, and why they might be beneficial. Travel Exhaustion | Why? | Mass Market Games | Excuses | Dulcinea Pitagora | Competition | Game Development | Strip Scrabble | Video Games | Roleplay | Reward vs. Punishment | Consent | Sex Dice | Truth or Dare | Intoxicants | Who Would You Fuck? | Gamification | Protocol | Habitica | Sticker Chart | Skill Equity | Group Sex | Making a Game | Dating Sims | OMGyes | Question Box Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

11 Sep 201958min

This week Bex interviews his friend and roommate, sex educator and queer pirate Jo Goforth, about finding identity through fandom, positive representations of masculinity, and their new sex ed comic, among other things. Coworker Chart | Union-Busting | Fandom | A Song of Ice and Fire | X-Men | Black Sails | Resonant Characters | Quicksilver | Cosplay | Musketeers | Jake Peralta | Positive Masculinity | Queer Representation | Queer Utopia | Trans Generations | Transphobia | Coming Out | Shifting Orientation | Introspection | Sex Talk Comic | Trans Sex Ed Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

3 Sep 201958min