031 | I Lost 55 Pounds and This Is How I Did It - The Importance of Self Care As A Special Needs Parent

I am really excited to be talking about today's topic, which is mostly about my weight loss journey. I wanted to do this episode because it's  New Year, and so many of us want this year to be the one that we change and experience amazing things. One of those things is self-care! A lot of times, we give so much to our families, friends, our job, and school, but you cannot pour from an empty cup. Sometimes you may go without sleeping or eating, and all of the comforts you are used to just so you can take care of everybody else. Often, when you are in survival mode, self-care is not on any list that you have. In this episode, I am going to be talking about my belief about self-care and how it has helped me in my weight loss journey.  When Remy was diagnosed with autism and epilepsy, I thought a lot about the future. What would it look like for Remy? Would she be able to be independent, or would she even make it to adulthood? One of the biggest concerns of mine is that I am going to die before she does. Any parents want to die before their kid, but when you have a child with autism or special needs, you don't want that to happen because you don't know what will happen to them without you there. When you have someone, who could potentially be taken care of their whole life, the typical 18-year mark to adulthood extends to the length of time your child will be alive. So with that fear, we have to think of financial support, who will take care of them, if they will be put in a home, and we worry that no one will take care of them or love them like we would.  We need to focus on how to take care of ourselves so we can be there for our kids as long as possible. The importance of self-care is one of those things we know is true but is so hard to practice. How do we take care of ourselves and love ourselves when we have so much on our plates?   Over the years, since I've had children, I've been able to lose weight after each pregnancy. But it was especially hard once I had Remy to re-lose the weight again. When I had decided to start dieting again, Remy began having seizures, and I didn't feel like I could keep it up. I'd been on many diets before but fast forward five years, I hadn't lost weight, I was the heaviest I've ever been and completely miserable.  I realized that I was using food to numb myself. It is really stressful to be a mom of four, and to watch your daughter have seizures all the time. But I realized that if I kept going and didn't keep myself in check, I wouldn't be around to help Remy as she got older. How I was feeling and the state of health that I was in, there is no way I would be able to take care of her if I didn't do something about it.  For the first time in my life, I decided to practice self-love and to tell myself that it was okay even if I had let myself go and gain a bunch of weight. By loving and forgiving myself, it made me appreciative of the body that I have. I've never appreciated my body in my life. I began to appreciate it because I had acted unconsciously for the last seven years and my body still functioned. I was thankful that my body let me do damage to it and that it was still working. All of us special needs moms devote ourselves entirely to taking care of everyone else. We don't take care of the most important thing that gives us the ability to take care of others, which is our bodies, minds, and our happiness. I had a couple of breakthroughs with this journey. I listened to two different amazing podcasts, which helped me to realize that I can accomplish my weight-loss goals.  I was successful enough to lose 20 pounds, but over the summer, I still struggled to lose anymore.  It was over six months that I lost 20 pounds, but I wasn't very successful in the summer in my effort to increase my weight loss. It caused me to realize that the problem lay in what I was thinking. I would feel envious of different women that I saw on TV that seemed like they had everything they needed, and that was why they were successful at their weight goals. But I began to listen to the thoughts that I was thinking, and I realized that I have access to the same resources that other women do. The only difference is my mindset. My thoughts when I compared myself to other women had become a belief, and when it becomes a belief, it becomes the truth.  The biggest thing that I have learned is that you cannot lose weight by being unconscious. You have to pay attention to what you are eating and why. Once I knew that all of the things I had previously been thinking were lies, that's when things started to take off. When you question yourself enough, the autopilot of your mind gets rid of old food habits. I am so excited to say that I was able to lose 55 pounds!! I'm so happy because the food doesn't control me anymore. I lost fifty-five pounds, and I am still going. I work out three to five times a week, I am stronger, and I feel amazing. I started by just making small changes and working on my mindset.  In this episode, I also include a description of what my own diet looks like and how it's worked for me. If losing weight is on your list of things to do for the New Year, go check out the Losing 100 Pounds podcast. I know because I have done it! I believe that this year is going to be your year, it will be a new start, and I know that you will be unstoppable. Make this year different, and please let me know how it is going! We need to love ourselves so that we can be better parents for our kids!  If we do not love ourselves, we will not be healthy enough to take care of our children or live as long as we could to be around for them.  Shaming yourself will only make you feel worse. By feeling shame about how much weight you've gained, or how you've failed at your goals in the past, you are allowing yourself to have a negative mindset that won't improve the situation. You have been through a lot, and it is okay to love your body for still being there for you.  The real work comes when you change your mindset. If you do not change your perspective about weight loss or other goals, you will not be able to change the patterns that you have been in. Mindset is the most important thing to retrain.  You cannot eat unconsciously and expect to lose weight.  If you are not aware of when or why you are eating, you will not be able to recognize your unhealthy habits or patterns and be able to adjust them accordingly.  When you start talking to yourself and questioning all those thoughts, they lose their power and just go away. Our thoughts are conditioned to believe that we have to binge eat or that we aren't strong enough to resist dessert. Still, by challenging our own minds, we begin to train them to believe something else.  Links mentioned in the show Online Marketing Made Easy Podcast with Amy Porterfield.  https://www.amyporterfield.com/2018/11/239/ Losing 100 Pounds Podcast with Corrine Crabtree.  https://www.phit-n-phat.com/blog/ Connect with me Email: jody@jodywarshawsky.com FB Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/608571542825070/ FB Page https://www.facebook.com/acceptingtheunacceptable/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jodywarshawsky/ Website https://www.jodywarshawsky.com