EP195 – Tips for Creating the Perfect Dating Profile During COVID with Erika Ettin

Welcome to episode 130 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT. In this episode Dr. Cat speaks to me about BDSM, what does a BDSM relationship look like? How many people like some aspects of BDSM and learning to negotiate the rules and expectations.    Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT is a licensed couples therapist #88224, sex therapist, yoga instructor, published researcher, and reiki practitioner dedicated to evolving the relationship we have surrounding sexuality and our bodies. Dr. Cat integrates various schools of thought including neuro science, somatic theory, psychology, EMDR trauma therapy, and sexual health in her work for private practice, workshops, and transformational retreats that are designed to help people create a deeply fulfilling, prosperous relational and sexual life. For personal therapy work, check her out at CatMeyer.com     She is the co-creator of Goddess Celebration, an annual large scale women’s day retreat held in Malibu, CA, dedicated to uplifting and celebrating the goddess in every women.     Dr. Cat is also host to the popular podcast Eat.Play.Sex on iTunes, in which she brings you expert guests talking on how to ignite your love life both mentally, physically, and relationally. She also gives daily advice and wisdoms about all things sex, love, and yoga on Instagram.    In this episode, you will hear:     What does a BDSM relationship look like?  The relationship BDSM has with sexual identity   The power play dynamics of BDSM   How many people like some aspects of BDSM   The feelings of shame that arise around this issue   When is a good time to bring up BDSM to your partner?  How to talk about BDSM to your partner   Negotiating the rules and expectations   The different types of relationships that can flourish with BDSM   The after-care process of BDSM        Resources  http://Sexloveyoga.com   https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12119-019-09590-x     Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

2 Juli 201939min

Welcome to episode 129 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome Rachel Grant. We speak about healing from childhood sexual abuse, the sexual challenges survivors of sexual abuse face and going through the three stages of being a victim, survivor and beyond survivor.    Rachel Grant is the owner and founder of Rachel Grant Coaching and is a Sexual Abuse Recovery Coach. She is also the author of Beyond Surviving: The Final Stage in Recovery from Sexual Abuse.      She brings to the table a passionate belief that her clients do not have to remain trapped or confronted daily by the thoughts or behaviors that result from abuse. Through her own journey of recovery from sexual abuse, she has gained insight and understanding about what it takes to overcome abuse. This makes it possible for her to relate to and appreciate your struggles intimately.      Based on her desire to foster community, intimacy, and connection, she has dedicated much of her time to understanding relationships and communication and how they are impacted by abuse. For her, how we are relating to others is crucial to improving the overall quality of our lives. In addition to the lessons she's learned along the way, she has attended various lectures and trainings to further hone her skills.      Her program, Beyond Surviving, has been specifically designed to change the way we think about and heal from abuse. Based on her educational training, study of neuroscience, and lessons learned from her own journey, she has successfully used this program since 2007 to help her clients break free from the past and move on with their lives.      She holds an M.A. in Counseling Psychology. She provides a compassionate and challenging approach for her clients while using coaching as opposed to therapeutic models.    In this episode, you will hear:     How Rachel became interested in this work  How we are very quick to blame ourselves for sexual abuse   The sexual challenges survivors of sexual abuse face   Falling into the trap of doing things out of obligation   The importance of consent and negotiating   The impact of sexual abuse on a child’s developing brain   The impact of trauma on the brain   Can abuse affect sexual preferences and blueprint?   Understanding you don’t have to live with a sense of brokenness   Going through the three stages of being a victim, survivor and beyond survivor        Resources  www.rachelgrantcoaching.com     Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

25 Juni 201941min

Welcome to episode 128 of the Sexology Podcast! Today is a solo episode where I speak more in depth about talking to your kids about sex.    In this episode, you will hear:     The sex negative messages we receive as kids   What to do if you catch your child involved with sexual activity   Learning how to communicate the subject of sex to your child  The importance of talking about your values   Understanding that children are naturally curious about sex  The common sexual behaviours between child age groups   Be comfortable in using the correct names and terminology around sex  The importance of teaching them about personal boundaries   Providing clear information around safety   Having a good dialogue about sex on the internet  Understanding the importance of not providing negative information around body changes   Talking about basic self-contraception   Having a continued discussion around masturbation and consent  Explaining the various different sexual interests people will have    Resources  Age 10 & up: What’s Happening to My Body? Book for Girls: Revised Edition by Lynda Madaras What’s Happening to My Body? Book for Boys: Revised Edition by Lynda Madaras It’s Perfectly Normal: Changing Bodies, Growing Up, Sex, and Sexual Health (The Family Library) by Robie H. Harris Age 9 & up: Changing Bodies, Changing Lives: Expanded Third Edition: A Book for Teens on Sex and Relationships by Ruth Bell Age 7 to 11:  The Care & Keeping of Us: A Sharing Collection for Girls & Their Moms by Cara Natterson Age 4 to 8:  Those are MY Private Parts by Diane Hansen Age 4 & up:  It’s Not the Stork!: A Book About Girls, Boys, Babies, Bodies, Families and Friends (The Family Library) by Robie H. Harris https://siecus.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/Guidelines-CSE.pdf   https://www.nctsn.org/resources/sexual-development-and-behavior-children-information-parents-and-caregivers   https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

18 Juni 201934min

Welcome to episode 127 of the Sexology Podcast! Today is a recap episode where I revisit some of our previous episodes to help bring you the best orgasmic tips.   In this episode, we will revisit:   Episode 39  Dr. Laurie Mintz is an author, therapist, professor and speaker whose life’s work has been committed to helping people live fuller, richer lives through the art and science of psychology.  As a tenured Professor at the University of Florida, she teaches the Psychology of Human Sexuality to hundreds of undergraduate students each year. She also teaches and mentors graduate students, helping them find their own niche as psychologists. Dr. Mintz has published over 50 research articles in academic journals and six chapters in academic books. She has received numerous professional and teaching awards, and is a Fellow of the American Psychological Association.  Full episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2017/10/03/everything-you-need-to-know-about-orgasm/  Episode 06  Dr Barbach’s work as a couple’s therapist for more than three decades and the publication of Going the Distance: Finding and Keeping Lifelong Love crafted with David Geisinger, Ph.D., her partner of 32 years, has defined her as an acknowledged expert on intimate relationships. She is skilled in a variety of treatment modalities in treating individuals and couples with problems ranging from anxiety and depression to parenting and communication issues.  Full Episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2019/04/02/how-to-please-your-lover-by-dr-lonnie-barbach/  Episode 124   Vanessa Marin is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in sex therapy. She’s here to help you stop feeling embarrassed about sex and start having way more fun in the bedroom.    She has bachelor’s degrees in Human Sexuality and Sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology. She writes for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker, and has been featured over 1,000 times in major publications like O, The Oprah Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, Refinery29, and Real Simple.  Full episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2019/05/21/from-solo-sex-to-partnered-sex/  Episode 110  Dr. Janet Brito is an AASECT-certified sex therapist who also has a license in clinical psychology and social work. She is a graduate of Pacifica Graduate Institute and completed her postdoctoral fellowship from the University of Minnesota Medical School, one of only a few university programs in the world dedicated to sexuality training. Currently, she’s based in Honolulu, Hawaii and is the founder of the Center for Sexual and Reproductive Health, where she specializes in the areas of relationship and sex therapy, out of control sexual behavior, and gender and sexually diverse populations.  Full episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2019/02/12/fake-orgasms/  Episode 65  Dr. Debra Wickman is a gynecologist with more than 20 years of experience. She completed a fellowship in Female Sexual Medicine at UCLA, and is also trained as a sexuality counsellor. Her model of diagnosis and treatment incorporates programs that uniquely educate, empower, and encourage personal growth, sexual discovery and healing for women.  Full episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2018/04/03/holistic-sexual-medicine-with-debra-wickman-m-d/  Episode 59   Steve Bodansky together with his wife Vera have been teachers of Sensuality for the past 35 years. They met in 1980 and were married in 1983. Steve received a Masters in Molecular Biology at SUNY at Albany in 1979 and a Doctorate at More University in Sensuality in 1992 with an emphasis on female orgasm. He first studied and then taught at More U. thru 1992. Vera started doing one-hour orgasms demonstrations in 1980 and also received her doctorate in Sensual studies in 1992.  Full episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2018/02/20/extended-massive-orgasm-by-dr-steve-bodansky/  Episode 114   Emily Nagoski is the award-winning author of the New York Times bestseller, Come As You Are: the surprising new science that will transform your sex life and The Come As You Are Workbook, and co-author, with her sister Amelia, of Burnout: the secret to unlocking the stress cycle.  Full episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2019/03/12/female-orgasm-with-dr-emily-nagoski/   Resources  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     Helen Fisher Ted Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYfoGTIG7pY     https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

11 Juni 201925min

Welcome to episode 126 of the Sexology Podcast! Today is a solo episode where I answer a listener's question on what to do when his wife doesn’t want to have sex anymore.     In this episode, you will hear:     The definition of a sexless marriage   How this is a global issue   How sex is a form of attachment   The way in which no sex can be a by-product of relationship dissatisfaction   Why couples refrain from sex   The need to repair the relationship before tackling the issue of lack of sex   Understanding the need to reflect on your own wants and needs   The importance of processing these emotions   Trying to pinpoint when these issues first arose   The different stages of love we experience in a relationship   The importance of communication throughout this process   Creating time in your life to work on this issue   Tips and recommendations to help begin improving such as date nights   Introducing novelty into the relationship to create excitement   Understanding and tackling sexual boredom           Resources  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     Helen Fisher Ted Talk - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYfoGTIG7pY     https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care      Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

4 Juni 201928min

Welcome to episode 125 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome Dr Melvin L. Phillips, Jr. to the podcast. In this episode Dr. Melvin speaks to me about chronic illness, the challenges of dealing with this issue, the uncertainty and anxiety it can create and tips on how to regain a sense of sexual normality.    Dr Melvin L. Phillips, Jr. is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) in Washington, DC, Maryland, and Virginia. Dr Phillips has worked in several mental health and substance abuse treatment settings including outpatient community mental health, inpatient treatment, and private practice for the past 13 years.     He is a speaker and has lectured on topics including preventative services, anxiety and stress management, caregiving stress, depression in the elderly, mindfulness and cognitive strategies for chronic pain, revalidating sexuality for couples with chronic pain and illness, ethical decision making, and the assessment of mental disorders. He has published in the Journal of Baccalaureate Social Work, conducting a research study on LGBTQ-Affirmative Teaching at Historically Black Colleges and Universities: Understanding Program Directors Views.     He holds a Doctor of Education (Ed.D.) degree in Organizational Leadership with an emphasis in Behavioral Health from Grand Canyon University in Phoenix, AZ. In addition, Dr Phillips holds a Master of Social Work (MSW) degree from Norfolk State University and is an adjunct professor in the Master of Social Work Program with the School of Social Work at Western New Mexico University. Dr Phillips currently is currently in private practice in Washington, DC., where he treats chronic illness and sexual dysfunction.    In this episode, you will hear:     How the is a common issue but one of talked about enough   The challenges of dealing with chronic illness  The side effects of becoming hooked on medication   Learning to continue to enjoy pleasure through chronic illness   How people going through this feel a part of their relationship has been stolen from them  The uncertainty and anxiety it can create   The impacts on your desire level   Learning more about retrograde ejaculation   Tips on how to regain a sense of sexual normality   The importance of communication through this issue  The way in which sexual rigidity can cause further problems         Resources  www.ccccmentalhealth.com  www.drleephillips.com     Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

28 Maj 201939min

Welcome to episode 124 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome Vanessa Marin to the podcast. In this episode she speaks about masturbation, the common myths surrounding female orgasm, how porn and the media only represent one kind of female body and experimenting with sex toys.   Vanessa Marin is a licensed psychotherapist specializing in sex therapy. She’s here to help you stop feeling embarrassed about sex and start having way more fun in the bedroom.   She has bachelor’s degrees in Human Sexuality and Sociology from Brown University, and a master’s degree in counseling psychology. She writes for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker, and has been featured over 1,000 times in major publications like O, The Oprah Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, Refinery29, and Real Simple.    Vanessa specializes in online programs that help you transform your sex life from ordinary to extraordinary, all from the comfort and privacy of your own home. Through courses like The Passion Project: A Couples’ Blueprint To Rediscovering Desire And Reigniting The Spark and Finishing School: Learn How To Orgasm, she finds immense joy in spreading the message that we all deserve more from our sex lives.   Vanessa’s business is actually a family affair! Vanessa’s sister Jennifer is her right-hand woman. And since her husband Xander joined to help manage the online portion of the business, they have joined forces to start talking about the challenges faced in modern day relationships  - including their own - with the goal of exploring how a fulfilling sex life plays an integral role in a healthy relationship.  In this episode, you will hear:   The common myths surrounding female orgasm   The issue of women hating their bodies   How porn and the media only represent one kind of female body   The rise of plastic surgery to change the shape of genitalia   Redefining four play – why it’s not just a prelude to penetrative sex   What is a pre-orgasmic women?  The shame that still exists around masturbation   Ways to further explore your own journey with masturbation   How masturbation can be a form of self-love and self-care   Recommendations on discussing masturbation with your partner   Transferring new sexual skills from masturbation to sex with your partner   The importance of communication and specific instruction   Experimenting with sex toys           Resources  https://vmtherapy.com   https://vmtherapy.com/online-sex-therapy-programs/     The Vulva Gallery - www.instagram.com/the.vulva.gallery     Jennifer Gunsaullus Episode - http://www.sexologypodcast.com/2017/04/18/the-power-of-masturbation-with-dr-jennifer-gunsaullus/     Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

21 Maj 201935min

Welcome to episode 123 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome Rae McDaniel to the podcast. In this episode they speak about the difference between being bisexual and heteroflexible, taking the first steps to explore your sexual curiosity and understanding the need to treat potential dates and partners with care and respect as you explore your sexual curiosity.    Rae McDaniel is a Gender and Certified Sex Therapist who works with folks feeling anxious and lost about a transition they’re experiencing in sex, gender, sexual identity, or relationships. Rae also provide consultation & training for professionals and organizations wishing to uplevel their knowledge and expertise in these areas. Rae is the founder of Practical Audacity, a therapy and healing collective in Chicago, Illinois.   Rae holds a Master of Education in Community Counseling from DePaul University in Chicago and is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor in Illinois. Rae graduated from the University of Michigan’s Sexual Health Certificate Program with specializations in Sex Therapy and Sexuality Education and is a Certified Sex Therapist through the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists.  In this episode, you will hear:   What is the difference between being bisexual and heteroflexible?  Does consuming the same sex porn make you homosexual?   The difficulties people experience when they find out their partner is consuming same sex porn   How western culture is more accepting of women being bisexual than men   The discriminations that still exist on society today for showing any affection to the same sex   How bisexuals struggle for support even within the LGBTQ community   Taking the first steps to exploring your sexual curiosity  Understanding the need to treat potential dates and partners with care and respect as you explore your sexual curiosity  How to start the dialogue with your partner around this issue if you’re in a monogamous relationship     Resources  http://www.practicalaudacity.com     Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/   https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://twitter.com/oasis2care    https://oasis2care.clientsecure.me/client_portal   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

14 Maj 201936min