Borderline Personality: DBT and Working with Self-Hatred with Dr. Blaise Aguirre

If you live in the United States – and probably for many people who don’t – it’s been a bit of a stressful week. Today Dr. Hanson and Forrest talk about relaxing anxiety, weathering the storm, and taking in the year as a whole.  Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 1:30: Where do we want to allocate our attention? 5:00: Rational, appropriate stress and anxiety.  8:00: The cost of ‘negative’ emotions.  12:30: Practices of calming stress.  14:45: Giving yourself grace, and accepting some amount of stress.  17:40: Deal with the bad, turn toward the good, take in the good.  22:15: Seeing what is true.  26:45: Being happy when others are not.  36:40: A practice for calming and centering.  44:45: Learning from the hard parts of practice. If you'd like to learn more about Jaimal Yogis, here's his website.  Overcome Anxiety:  Let go of anxiety and grow a greater sense of calm strength with Rick's Dealing with Anxiety program, which offers 5 powerful practices for managing stress and worries. Save 10% with coupon code BEINGWELL. Sponsors: From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

9 Nov 202051min

In the second part of our 10 most essential lessons for a great life, we explore accepting difference, open heartedness, healthy skepticism, embracing life, and impermanence.  Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 2:30: Different people are different. 10:00: Open your heart.  13:45: Open heartedness as a ‘field.’ 19:20: Cultivate a stance of healthy skepticism.  27:00: Honor the gift of your life.  33:00: All things end.  37:00: The feeling of one minute. Overcome Anxiety:  Let go of anxiety and grow a greater sense of calm strength with Rick's Dealing with Anxiety program, which offers 5 powerful practices for managing stress and worries. Save 10% with coupon code BEINGWELL. Sponsors: From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 Nov 202049min

What are the most essential lessons we've ever learned? Today we're exploring the first half of our 10 most important practices, skills, techniques, and reflections for the long road of life. Today we cover getting on your own side, the impact of childhood, widening your view, slowing down, and taking in the good. A quick summary of Rick's approach to taking in the good. Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 1:30: Introduction: The view from the porch.  4:10: Get on your own side.  7:10: Respect the impact of childhood experiences.  13:20: Widen your view.  21:10: Grow the space between stimulus and response. 30:00: Take in the good.  44:00: Recap and ending. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Sponsors: Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

26 Okt 202045min

About the Episode: Studies show that Americans feel less connected and more divided than ever before. Celeste Headlee, an award winning journalist, joins us to explore how we can navigate the many hard conversations that are happening these days.  About our Guest: In her 20-year career in public radio, Celeste appeared on NPR, PRI, CNN, and the BBC. She has been the Executive Producer of On Second Thought for Georgia Public Broadcasting, and anchored shows including Tell Me More, Talk of the Nation, All Things Considered, and Weekend Edition at NPR.  Celeste is also the author of two wonderful books: We Need To Talk: How To Have Conversations That Matter and Do Nothing: How to Break Away from Overworking, Overdoing, and Underliving.  Here's a summary of George Lakoff's framing theory that was mentioned during our conversation. Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 1:30: “Pandemic okay.” 4:45: Being a good talker vs. being a good conversationalist.  7:15: Why intelligent people can struggle to be good conversationalists.  11:30: Working with the inevitable presence of bias.  14:15: Facts, feelings, and frame theory. 18:00: Metacognition and confirmation bias.  22:45: Do facts change people’s opinions? 24:45: Making it easy for people to change their mind.  31:00: Maintaining our mental health inside hard conversations.  35:45: “Bothsides-ism” 40:00: How to engage when someone’s argument isn’t based on facts you agree with. 45:00: Doing less to do more. 50:00: The power of weak ties, and the negative impact of too much tech. 53:00: A message to your younger self.  Overcome Anxiety:  Let go of anxiety and grow a greater sense of calm strength with Rick's Dealing with Anxiety program, which offers 5 powerful practices for managing stress and worries. Save 10% with coupon code BEINGWELL. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Sponsors:   Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

19 Okt 20201h

It’s one thing to use some of the tools that we talk about on this podcast when things feel stable and are going “good enough.” It’s another to apply them when the world feels threatening. Today we’re learning how to have more 'equanimity,' which is what allows us to maintain our composure, presence of mind, and perhaps even wellbeing under challenging circumstances.   Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 1:30: How do we define equanimity? 4:00: Psychological experience of equanimity.  4:30: Hedonic tone. 8:00: Brain science behind equanimity. 11:30: Liking and wanting. 14:30: Equanimity in secular Buddhism.  15:30: Equanimity, privilege, and gaslighting.  22:00: Dealing with unfairness. 26:30: Responding to painful experiences in the moment.  30:30: The ‘four foundations’ of equanimity.  35:30: Manage aversion. 37:30: Grow the good.  39:15: Find what endures. Overcome Anxiety:  Let go of anxiety and grow a greater sense of calm strength with Rick's Dealing with Anxiety program, which offers 5 powerful practices for managing stress and worries. Save 10% with coupon code BEINGWELL. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Sponsors: Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Okt 202047min

How can we be more productive, and improve our ability to focus on the things we really care about, without it becoming a source of stress? Chris Bailey, who TED described as "possibly the most productive person you could ever meet," joins us to explore how to get your brain to focus.  About our Guest: Chris is the bestselling author of Hyperfocus and The Productivity Project, and his website A Life of Productivity has a small army of devoted readers. Chris' wonderful TED talk, How to Get Your Brain to Focus, touches on many of the topics we explore in this episode. Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 3:15: What does it mean to be productive? 5:00: A year of productivity.  7:00: What is the goal of productivity? 10:45: Defining success, and the Rule of Threes. 15:30: Our negative attitudes toward productivity. 18:30: Defining and finding intentionality. 22:40: Productivity benefits of meditation. 31:20: Finding fulfillment and working calmly. 36:15: Maintaining focus and productivity during challenging times. 41:30: The TV and your attention. 49:00: How to build our capacity for focus.  Overcome Anxiety:  Let go of anxiety and grow a greater sense of calm strength with Rick's Dealing with Anxiety program, which offers 5 powerful practices for managing stress and worries. Save 10% with coupon code BEINGWELL. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Sponsors: Want fresh, delicious, simple dinners delivered right to your doorstep? Check out HelloFresh, America’s #1 meal kit, and use code beingwell90 to get $90 off including free shipping!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

5 Okt 202059min

How have children experienced this year's challenges, and how can we get better at talking with them about race and racism? Today we’re focusing on trauma, resilience, and effective coping, and particularly on the unique challenges experienced by young people and their parents. About our Guest: Dr. Allison Briscoe-Smith is a child clinical psychologist who specializes in trauma and issues of race. She is a senior fellow of Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, and is both a professor and the Director of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion at the Wright Institute.  Here's Allison's wonderful article on parenting during overwhelming times that I referenced during our conversation. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 2:25: Honoring the small challenges alongside the big ones.  5:30: What challenges are children facing this year? 7:30: How are children processing our challenges differently from adults? 9:50: Helping children manage this time. 11:30: Finding hope, and having things to look forward to. 13:30: Signs of PTSD, and listening to our children.  16:30: How can we get better at talking to kids? 21:00: How children are processing racial violence. 24:10: Talking with children about racial violence. 28:00: Bias, implicit and otherwise. 34:30: How does bias find its way into the virtual classroom? 37:05: What are we privileging in different spaces? 42:00: The first time a kid experiences or perpetrates racism. 48:30: Creating a family mission statement. Sponsors:  From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

28 Sep 202058min

How can we maintain contentment, calm, or inner peace, while still aiming high, pursuing good goals, and experiencing natural frustration and anger? And is contentment even a good goal when there's so much injustice out in the world? Rick's Course: If you'd like to learn how to change your brain for the better, check out Rick's Positive Neuroplasticity Training. It's a six-week online course that will teach you how to beat your brain's negativity bias, and have more confidence, compassion, and inner peace. Use coupon code BEWELL50 at checkout for $50 off the purchase price. Key Topics: 1:45: Why contentment matters. 4:30: Can we be content when things are hard? 6:00: Being skeptical of the “wanting mind.” 8:30: How can we return to contentment when moved from it? 12:10: What’s wrong with being driven? Does contentment make us lazy? 16:20: Self-actualization and taking action from a place of fullness. 19:00: Staying content while performing basic tasks. 21:50: Contentment vs. complacency.  25:20: Content while hurt or angry.  29:30: How to build contentment when times are tough. 35:00: Can we be content and afraid? 46:00: Recap From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Sponsors: Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/BEINGWELL and get a free trial of their Premium Membership. Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Connect with the show: Follow us on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 Sep 202050min