Nakba #14 - Fawzeeyya Mustafa

1948 “Before I had turned seven, we finally got a school in our village. My father wanted me to receive an education. I, along with eight other girls, started school. Four months later, al-Nakba occurred.” 1982 “After the Israelis attacked Beirut in 1982, the Red Cross issued temporary permits to travel to Palestine. My husband and I crossed the Lebanese border and stayed for one month in Ijlil al-Qibliyya. We had relatives there. Ijlil al-Qibliyya is close to my home village, and my husband pointed out where the village had once stood. I sat down on the ground and covered my clothes and my hair with soil. I cried, bowed my head, and kissed the earth.” - Did you have any dreams as a child about what you wanted to become? “I had no dreams back then. After we were forced to Lebanon, I became aware of dreams and hopes. When I became aware of my situation, I dreamed of returning to my country. That became my dream: to regain my true national identity, which ensures my dignity and erases the concept of being a refugee.” (begins to cry) “The concept of ‘refugee’ is deeply humiliating.” - Perhaps a foolish question, but in what way is it humiliating? “When I say the word ‘refugee,’ my heart aches and fills with tears. Our hearts cry because we want our land back. We do not want to go to Canada or Australia. We want to return to our own land. That land suits us.” - Who is responsible for your situation? “It is difficult to answer that question. My father used to say that he regretted leaving his land. Then he would say, ‘My tears fall down my cheeks.’ Our family left Palestine, but most of my relatives stayed. More than 70 years have passed since al-Nakba; it has been a very difficult time. If I had been strong enough in 1982, I would have stayed in Palestine. That land suits us.”