How to Build (and Repair) Love: The Gottmans on What Every Couple Should Know

How to Build (and Repair) Love: The Gottmans on What Every Couple Should Know

The most powerful way to enter a new year is not with resolutions, but with a deeper understanding of how to connect with the people who matter most.

As we close out the year, the Finding Mastery team is taking time to rest, re-calibrate and reflect — practicing the same principles we talk about on this podcast.

So today, we’re sharing a conversation from the Finding Mastery Vault with two legends in the science of relationships: Drs. John and Julie Gottman.

Together, they’ve spent more than 50 years studying what makes love last — from small moments of connection to the hidden habits that quietly erode trust. In this conversation, we explore the daily rituals that deepen intimacy, how to repair after conflict, and why the best relationships aren’t perfect — they’re practiced.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How to turn conflict into closeness through repair
  • The four behaviors that quietly destroy relationships (and how to replace them)
  • Why “love is a verb” — and what that means in action
  • The difference between bids for connection and real listening
  • How to communicate needs without criticism or defensiveness


From the entire Finding Mastery team, we wish you and your loved ones a very happy, healthy New Year. We’ll see you in 2026! Enjoy this episode with The Gottmans.

________________________________________________________________

Links & Resources

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