Ask Uncut - My Partner Needs P*rn to Have Sex With Me

Hey Lifers,

This is ask uncut where we answer all of your deep and burning questions after we've had a bit of a gasbag about our own personal dilemmas!

Have you noticed that children's dolls are now wearing g-strings? How do you feel about that?
Vibes for the week:

Britt Netflix doco The Lie: The Murder of Grace Millane
Laura Glass Podcast by Shameless Media
Keeshia Love and Loss Piece by Zara Seidler

Then we jump into your questions!

PARTNER WATCHES PORN BEFORE WE HAVE SEX
My fiancé and I have had issues in the bedroom for years. He’s struggling with anxiety and takes a medication which has massively affected his sex drive. Over the past few months he’s been asking me if I want to have sex, but it's always been after he’s been on his phone in bed, and already has a raging boner - so I assumed he’s watching porn. I looked at his google browser history on the computer we share (the same google browser on his phone), and it turns out he’s been watching porn right before asking me for sex, as I assumed. I know I shouldn’t have looked at his history but I was going crazy. I’m in two minds. One is complete jealousy as I feel like he needs another girl to turn him on before he can sleep with me. But I also know that he’s probably just doing what he needs to to get it up and get the job done as I’ve been putting the pressure on lately. For context: we have a great relationship, we’re getting married in a month, I know he finds me attractive - he’s constantly tapping me on butt, grabbing my boobs etc, but I’m just struggling to be okay with this. I also don’t want to tell him that I’ve looked at his browser history so I don’t know how to talk to him about it.

FAMILY NOT COMING TO KIDS BIRTHDAY
I come from quite a messy family. I have 6 siblings, all half. My dad is on to his 4th marriage and my mum has had 2 divorces. I’ve always been close with my mum but have only become close with my dad in the past 5 or so years. My parent’s break up was very messy and they’ve never been amicable since. I now have a beautiful partner and a darling little daughter who is just about to turn one. We’re throwing her a party and have invited all our friends and family. However, a few weeks out, my Dad has just said that no one from his side of my family (himself, my step mum, brother and his family) will be coming because they feel uncomfortable and they would like to have a seperate party for my daughter instead. I’m so disappointed! It’s been over 20 years since they divorced, he’s had 2 marriages since! How are they still hung up on this to the point that they can’t be in the same room for an hour? I never wanted my daughter to have to celebrate everything twice like I have. What would you do? Do I suck it up and throw two parties? Or just say to my dad that he’ll unfortunately have to miss out?

DITCHING A WAKE
Should you ditch a wake (after a funeral), to go to a footy match? Our team has made it into the finals, but the day of the game is the funeral of a grandparent. My sibling thinks it’s ok to go to the service and skip out after to make the game, but I think that is in very poor taste. What are your thoughts?

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