Talking, Teens, and Twenty-four Years :: Bruce + Heather [Ep 399]

Seasons change. Hard choices have to be made. God moves us in and out of opportunities. But how do we know when it’s time to give something up and when it’s time to press through? Today’s guest is Christy Nockels, Dove award winning musician and mom to three children. In 2006 she made the God-led choice to step away from the music industry, for a time, to pour into her family. In this episode we talk about transitions. She shares advice on staying connected with community when moving to new cities, leaning into God during tough decisions and connecting intimately with God even in the busyness of motherhood. Christy trusted God’s leading and He moved her back into record production. Her latest creative work is the solo Christmas album, “The Thrill of Hope”. With a blend of classic Christmas carols and original pieces, she has crafted a beautiful addition to our Christmas music collections. In this episode you’ll hear the inspiration behind the songs, “Amaryllis” and “Wrap This One Up”. . .both stories gave me goosebumps. I won’t think of the Bethlehem shepherds the same way again. And the winter blooming amaryllis reminds us the hope Jesus brought . . . What we chat about: How to find connection and keep from “drifting” when starting somewhere new What Christy learned when God called her to “take everything off of the table” Surrendering our plans to God is the only way He can do GOD-SIZED things with them How big, scary steps allow us to hide in Jesus instead of hiding in the familiar Each season prepares us for the next (even if you would really love to skip ahead) How motherhood takes you from peaceful quiet times to sock-and-underwear prayers The secret of simple scripture and open dialogue with God Christy’s new album “The Thrill of Hope”- her first Christmas album! The message of the amaryllis for those with heavy hearts in the Christmas season How “wrapped in swaddling clothes” may have meant much more to the shepherds Christy’s song on the new album that makes her listeners “ugly cry” Links Mentioned: The Passion Conference Psalm 37:4-7 “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” The Glorious in the Mundane podcast “The Thrill of Hope” available on Christy’s site or Amazon** Ellie Holcomb PDF of “Amaryllis” lyrics I made. . .Merry Christmas! Our King has come, He’s with us now & He’s making all things new again. That’s the thrill of hope. Jesus, this is such an opportunity for me to hide in you – to take you by the hand and for you to lead me, and for me to trust in you in a way that I haven’t in a really long time. -Christy, Episode 144

27 Nov 201650min

Life seems to be a series of highs and lows. If my happiness depends on the circumstances around me, I’m in for quite the roller coaster ride. Even this past week we received heartbreaking news about my mom’s health. BUT God has been faithful and present and steadfast to show up in the details. Including the timing of this interview. . . Sara Hagerty’s book “Every Bitter Thing is Sweet” released in October 2014. I started reading it in May 2015 when my dad was diagnosed with colon cancer. Her words soothed my aching heart. Her honesty about her dad’s cancer diagnosis and God’s faithfulness through it brought me peace. Then the day after we got my mom’s diagnosis I’m on Skype interviewing Sara. Well, first she and I cried and prayed together. . .then we recorded this interview. Like I said, God is in the details. Sara knows the struggle to believe God is good when life doesn’t turn out the way you’d hope. From marriage struggles, financial insecurity, parent illness, infertility exhaustion, etc, Sara discovered her only place of true security came when she prayed back God’s Word back to Him in adoration. One day while sitting in her kitchen, utterly exhausted by life, God gave her these words: The satisfied soul loathes the honeycomb, but to the hungry soul,  every bitter thing is sweet. (Proverbs 27:7) Thanksgiving week is full of remembering all that God has done for us. Who couldn’t use an extra heaping helping of gratitude these days? Sara reminding us about adoration, takes gratitude and turns it towards who God is. Praising Him not for what He has done for me, but who He promises to be. Which then shifts my heart to believe He is who He says He is. In control. Almighty. Beginning and End. Lover of our souls. Binder of the brokenhearted. If you need to hear a word of encouragement and be reminded of who God is and why He can be trusted, then this episode is for you, sweet sister. Happy Thanksgiving! What we chat about: Discovering life with God is often NOT like a treadmill, always gaining speed and strength God’s revelations to Sara through the pain of infertility and marriage struggles Facing bitterness and the nagging feeling “God is good, he’s just not good to me.” Recognizing the hunger that lies beneath bitterness; God’s “divine alluring” Intentionally seeking God in the places your heart comes alive Adoration as a spiritual discipline: speaking scriptures (even the hard ones) back to Him Honesty with God on areas you struggle to believe instead of just splashing some “Jesus juice” on it How God sees all of the “hidden parts of life” of moms that often feel unnoticed Vulnerability not for it’s own sake but with the intention of God’s restoration How God not only restored Sara’s marriage, but how He used the hard times to bring more to it than she thought possible Links Mentioned: EveryBitterThingisSweet.com SaraHagertyAuthor.com “Every Bitter Thing is Sweet” book ** Psalm 139 2 Corinthians 12:9–Our weakness is the place where God moves. **Amazon affiliate link

21 Nov 201647min

I know, I know it’s not even Thanksgiving yet. . .and seeing the word “Christmas” may trigger a mix of excitement and terror. My goal in this episode is to help prepare you. To empower you in sharing with your kids the good news of God taking on flesh and dwelling among us. To help you create meaningful family traditions that your kids can  pass on to the next generation. Today’s guest is my good friend, Jacki Rucksdashel, author of the Jesse Tree Project. She is a mom to two amazing kids, a former classical education teacher and a darling, godly woman. Jacki and I chat about the value of creating Biblically-based Christmas traditions. Fortunately, there are lots of options these days for families to celebrate Advent.  We’re gonna help you sort through them so you can stay sane in the holiday cray-cray. Jacki & I encourage you to pick one (maybe two) of the options. And to consider your family’s interests, ages, and values when choosing. We also share personal stories of our “less-than-perfect” attempts at memory making. And how to be realistic when celebrating the holidays with little ones. Loved this from Jacki, sharing the heart behind this conversation: Am I teaching my children that Christmas is about busyness?  Or am I teaching my children that Christmas is about sitting at Jesus’s feet, and resting, and enjoying his birth and the fulfilling of the promise? It can get so easy so forget that, even in doing all the good things. What we chat about: Choosing a few, enjoyable traditions for your family, instead of ALL of them Why are Christmas traditions such a big deal, anyway? You can be your family’s first tradition-starter The Jesse Tree Project, and how it’s made especially for families with young children Using children’s anticipation for Christmas to mirror the Bible’s anticipation for a Savior Our own funny stories of how “perfectly planned” traditions turned out…um…less than perfect (i.e.: being realistic) Why it’s a good thing Jesus is NOT like Santa or the Elf on the Shelf Other great tradition starters for young children: Shepard on a Search, Star from Afar, The Giving Manger, Light ‘Em Up How to “mix and match” to find the right fit for your family Setting priorities by reverse-engineering from Dec 26 and what you would consider a (realistic) successful holiday. Links Mentioned: The Jesse Tree Project & How to Lead a Group Unwrapping the Greatest Gift ** Truth in the Tinsel (OhAmanda Episode 3) Visiting Santa (Heather’s thoughts on using Santa to teach grace) Elf on the Shelf ** Shepherd on a Search Star from Afar The Giving Manger Light Em Up (Courtney DeFeo Episode 50)

13 Nov 201652min

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice. . .including sassiness? Now I’m not a girl mom. But I am a girl. That’s gotta count for something. I know how complicated my emotions can be. With all the social media and cultural pressures, I can only imagine how overwhelming it is to raise a girl nowadays. Good news!!! Today’s help comes from girl expert and licensed counselor, Sissy Goff. She spends most of her days chatting with girls and their families. The author of eight books including, “Raising Girls”, Sissy brings loads of wisdom and perspective. In this episode we spend the first chunk of time talking on the topic of beauty. Then we move into whining and strong emotions (including the epidemic of childhood anxiety). Sissy shares great thoughts on girl friendships and sister stress. Personally, I love her thoughts on how attention issues (e.g., ADHD) can impact girls socially. Lastly, she gives excellent advice on how to maintain a healthy mother-daughter relationship. And this quote: What we chat about:  Speaking to the different areas of beauty God has placed in each girl, specifically calling out strength and bravery. How we, as moms, talk about OURSELVES influences how our daughters see themselves. Helping girls develop their own identity. Keeping an ongoing dialogue and pulling your daughter back “into the huddle of your family” to discuss external messages. Building up confidence helps lessen the fixation on external beauty. Circling back to the places your daughter is confident and the things she likes about herself. The importance of a girl’s father (or other male role model in her life) to show her she is valued for who she is. Helping your daughter realize most girls share her same struggles. Managing her intense emotions at home and recognizing anxiety. Teaching empathy in practical ways. Identifying “balcony friends,” “basement friends,” and “rollercoaster friends.” Respecting her capabilities and fighting the urge to “fix everything” as she moves into the teen years. Links Mentioned: raisingboysandgirls.com daystarcounseling.com Courtney DeFeo Are My Kids on Track?: The 12 Emotional, Social, and Spiritual Milestones Your Child Needs to Reach (to be released Feb 2017) by Sissy Goff and Melissa Trevathan ** Modern Parents, Vintage Values: Instilling Character in Today’s Kid by Melissa Trevathan and Sissy Goff** Intentional Parenting: Autopilot Is for Planes by Sissy Goff and David Thomas** Raising Girls by Melissa Trevathan and Sissy Goff** Freeing Your Child from Anxiety by Tamar Chansky (mentioned in the interview)**

6 Nov 201655min

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him.

31 Okt 201656min

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him.

23 Okt 201651min

Three years ago she directed us to soul healing. Two years ago she reminded us of the power of sex in marriage. Francie Winslow is back. This time to share what she’s learned about the exponential impact marital intimacy has on the world around us. In the past two years Francie has been doing extensive research on theology of the body. Exploring how God stamped His image on us. How we express our roles as image bearers through sex in marriage. God is an invisible God who wants to make himself visible to us. When man and woman come together as one it’s his invitation for humanity to become one with God. Intimately connected with Him. Francie shares their own family stress and her personal struggle with anxiety. Things that can disrupt marital connection. She vulnerably shares how she and her husband have purposefully chosen sex over isolation. God’s training us to fight for connection and for each other instead of against each other. Love Francie’s practical tips for keeping technology in check. So often screens and devices creep in between couples, increasing the distance and decreasing the intimacy. Don’t miss the list of great resources below to help train your children in forming a healthy perspective of the body and sex. What we chat about: Francie’s journey to learn sex isn’t dirty or a duty but a delight. Her recent study of theology of the body. How anxiety and adoption stress led Francie and her husband to choose to have more sex (you read that right). How technology impacts our marital connection and practical solutions Help and healing for women who struggle with their view of sex. A reminder to daily do the things that keep you alive as a person. The Ripple Effect of sex in marriage. A word of encouragement for the single mom. Training our kiddos in a healthy sexual worldview (check out Francie’s resource list below). Links Mentioned: Soul Freedom (encore)Episode The Power of Sex in Marriage Episode Andy Crouch Beth Moore’s Daniel Study** Francie’s Resource List: Theology of the Body Books for Kids by Monica Ashour Every Body is Smart: God Helps Me Listen & Choose** Every Body Has a Body: God Made Girls & Boys** Every Body is a Gift : God Made Us to Love** God Has a Plan for Boys & Girls ** Every Body Has Something to Say** Every Body Has Something to Give** Get these books (as many as you can!) and read them over and over and over.  They are great for a range of ages – not just toddlers.  Not only will it help form a great spiritual foundation for your kids as they enter a sexually intense world as kids (sadly it happens young these days), it will help you as a grown up re-learn how to think about bodies, sexuality and identity.  It will also help give you simple, common language to use on an everyday basis in your home.  They have all been such a big part of us growing in this new way of seeing the gift of sex as a family. For older kids: The Talk: 7 Lessons to Introduce Your Child to Biblical Sexuality** by Luke Gilkerson (there are several others to go with this series too).  Loving this one right now with my 8 year old.) Before I Was Born (God’s Design for Sex)** by Carolyn Nostrum Good Pictures, Bad Pictures : Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids ** by Kristen Jensen Theology of His Body/Theology of Her Body** by Jason Evert This was written with college kids in mind, but I found it super helpful and use it woven into conversations with my kids. For those who want more depth…Theology of the Body for Beginners** by Christopher West **Amazon Affiliate Link Sex is a multiplying factor in our lives, not just with producing kids, but producing a massive amount of connection.

17 Okt 201646min

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him.

14 Okt 201640min