SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 - Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

SS 346: Gang Bang the Mailbag 38 - Ideas about Size, Smooth Divorce, and BBWs

Tonight the Swingset opens the mailbag... but does so carefully, as it's -20F outside. Dylan Thomas, Ginger Bentham, Bex Caputo, and Lunabelle answer your listener questions!

Question 1:

My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. We have amazing sex, but I can't seem to get satisfied sexually. We have sex/oral sex at least twice a day, but it seems like the more I orgasm, the more I crave it. He's slightly below average size, and I don't have any problems with his size because he knows what to do with it, but he's very self-conscious about his size. I'd love to bring up the topic of polyamory to him, but I'm afraid he'll feel like I want to do it just to be with someone bigger. In fact, I'm 100% positive that is what he would think. I've always felt that I might be bisexual. I'm fascinated with being with a woman, but I don't know how he'll react. Of course, it's every guys fantasy to have a threesome, but because of his self-consciousness, I don't think he'd be interested. I won't lie, being with someone bigger is also a curiosity of mine. He has a phobia (?) of someone bigger changing the way my vagina feels to him, so even if he were interested in swinging, I don't think he'd want me to be with another man.

I love him very much, but I feel like there are a lot of things I want to experience and I'm not getting any younger (I'm 36). I don't want to break up over it, because I'm very happy with him, but I'd also like to see what his thoughts are about it. How can I bring it up in a subtle, non-threatening way that might make him more interested?

Question 2:

My spouse and I are considering divorce. We love each other so much, but 15 years of marriage has left it's scars. We both have other partners, and breaking up with them, or closing our relationship at all is not on the table. These relationships are long standing, and breaking up would hurt multiple people and breed resentment. Besides, the openness of our relationship is not the issue. Do you have any advice for maintaining secondary relationships while the primary is in trouble? How to maintain boundaries when your whole life is up in the air?

Hope that's not too long! I love your podcast, and I especially love listening to it at work, where everyone thinks I'm a sweet normal and slightly boring office manager.

Question 3:

We are always taught to think of ourselves as being sexy but we won't look at ourselves and imagine ourselves as being sexy individuals. One of the problems that I've seen recently is you look at profiles or even advertise it for things even the desire takeover is we talked a get-together of sexy people or people say we are looking for other sexy couples.

The man that couples look it up and see that she is a BBW or I am a short chunky guy we no longer fit that is sexy category and both know hurts her feelings hurt our feelings.

Why is it that BBW it's almost turned into a niche versus just a description of an individual? It's almost like you're not an individual you're a BBW so you don't fit into this category and I've seen this very very bad in the swingers world.

So my question would be for you all is have you seen this how open are you to BBWs in your opinion of BBWs and how suggestion would you make to BBWs to get themselves more confident comfortable and energetic about the lifestyle itself?

Lunabelle mentioned her post, "I Like Big Toys and I Cannot Lie".

Ginger mentioned the Unfuckwithable video.

Dylan mentioned Elle Chase's book, Curvy Girl Sex .

Bradford and Angela are coming to Desire… are you? Join us from November 2nd through the 9th this 2019 for Life on the Swingset's eighth trip to Desire! Visit swingsetdesire.com for more information!

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will get you invited to a private chat with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings, and listen to episodes commercial free, and with outtakes!

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

Dylan Thomas is available for for podcast consultation and production work. If you're interested, visit www.dylanthethomas.com.

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SS 200: Monogamish Life - Exploring New Frontiers With Dan Savage

SS 200: Monogamish Life - Exploring New Frontiers With Dan Savage

In two hundred episodes of Life on the Swingset, the podcast, we've seen ethical non-monogamy go from something whispered about into something that's getting cover articles in major publications. The entire idea of alternate relationships, sexual arrangements, and partnering is having a moment. Tonight, we're thrilled to have, as our guest, Dan Savage who, whether he likes it or not, is a sort of a Podfather to our little podcast, as the vicarious thrills we got from listening to people with very sexy lives helped shape at least my interest in exploring lifestyles.    Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Join us on our trip to Desire in 2015, where we're going, we don't need clothes! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

4 Mars 20151h 8min

SS 199: Reinventing Relationships with Magnus Sullivan, Writer/Producer of Marriage 2.0

SS 199: Reinventing Relationships with Magnus Sullivan, Writer/Producer of Marriage 2.0

Normal 0 false false false EN-US X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0in; mso-para-margin-right:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:8.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0in; line-height:107%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} All of us living life on the Swingset are well-versed in the passion, communication, and negotiation being consensually non-monogamous requires. Yet it's rare to see our kinds of relationships portrayed in mainstream films. One such film about to be released is Marriage 2.0 written and produced by Magnus Sullivan. In Magnus's movie, we are (quote) "invited to celebrate a modern redefinition of the committed relationship...where unfettered physical and emotional intimacy can fuel our passion while strengthening the bond with those we love." Tonight we have Magnus Sullivan join us on the Swingset to talk relationships and the role movies can play in reinventing relationships. You can find Marriage 2.0’s Twitter account here! Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

25 Feb 20151h 17min

SS 198: Blowjobs, Cunnilingus, and Educational Porn with Sophie Delancey

SS 198: Blowjobs, Cunnilingus, and Educational Porn with Sophie Delancey

We've talked at length about the sad fact that many young people in america get the entirety of their sex ed from watching porn. When porn comes that's actually designed to educate, however, it can be revelatory. We're rejoined by old friend (and new Swingset.FM contributor) Sophie Delancey from The Art of Blowjob and the brand new Art of Cunnilingus to talk about art, educational porn, and oral sex! Rachel Kramer Bussel wrote an article Salon.com published recently on cunnilingus.   Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

18 Feb 201557min

SS 197: Sexual Expression and Art with Guest Rachel Lark

SS 197: Sexual Expression and Art with Guest Rachel Lark

Those of us who write about sex and speak about sex and sing about sex have stepped into a unique realm in our society. Where sex was always a hush hush don't talk about it subject, we've decided to podcast, and write, and write songs, and express our sexuality into the world for many different reasons. Rachel Lark, who wrote those awesome naughty Christmas songs a few episodes ago, has joined us to talk about sexual expression, play a few songs, and have a good time.     Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

11 Feb 20151h 6min

SS 196: Bacchanalia Basics at The Tool Shed in Milwaukee, WI

SS 196: Bacchanalia Basics at The Tool Shed in Milwaukee, WI

Cooper, Dylan, and Miko return to Milwaukee, Wisconsin's wonderful Tool Shed to reprise Swingset's discussion on play parties. They’re whispered about, opinions are drawn, expectations are high for both attendees and non. The sex party, the play party, the swinger party, call it what you will, to anyone who’s never been to one they conjure up visions of hedonistic abandon, or deeply creepy masked affairs. With so many people looking to explore their sexuality and needing a safe place to do so, play parties have value far beyond a whole bunch of naked people in a room. They can educate as well as titillate. So that's what we're here to talk about today.

10 Feb 20151h 51min

SS 195: Swinging For Dummies VII: Threesomes

SS 195: Swinging For Dummies VII: Threesomes

In our Swinging for Dummies Series thus far, we've taken you through deciding you're open, talking to your partner, setting up your profile, and going on a first date. We think you're ready for the meat of the course now: Threesomes! We discuss the ever-present acronyms fmf, mfm, mmf, different configurations and play styles, thinking about the new person as a sex toy, an other, or as an honored guest, playing as the single and of course... negotiating threesomes, communication, when threesomes go bad and when threesomes go great!     Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

4 Feb 20151h 7min

SS 194: Orgasms, Sexuality & Depression - #OrgasmQuest with guest Crista Anne

SS 194: Orgasms, Sexuality & Depression - #OrgasmQuest with guest Crista Anne

The Swingset welcomes back Crista Anne to discuss her recent commitment to herself; to find a path back to self-orgasm through once a day masturbation. Through her very personal and public #OrgasmQuest Crista is documenting her navigation through life-long depression, antidepressants, self-care, living and loving life and parenting and today she shares it all with us, and we share our stories with her.   Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

28 Jan 20151h 15min

SS 193: Gang Bang the Mailbag 19 - Broken Rules, Multiple Male Orgasms, "My Teenager Knows" and Dan Savage

SS 193: Gang Bang the Mailbag 19 - Broken Rules, Multiple Male Orgasms, "My Teenager Knows" and Dan Savage

Our mailbag, full of pluck and fancy, keeps coming back with more questions for us to ponder and maybe even eventualy answer! Today we discuss swinging as parents of very young children, broken rules and people set off-limits, multiple male orgasms and never fail erections, "Poly Doesn't Work", what to do when finding out the local neighborhood teenager knows, and finding lust in Minnesota. We also take a mid-episode break and cut to the Savage Lovecast hosted by Dan Savage where Cooper chimes in for a question about swinging. You can find the full episode (Cooper is on the Full Magnum episode) at: http://www.savagelovecast.com/episodes/430#.VL-peyvF98E   Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything! Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

21 Jan 20151h 35min

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