EP 113: A Raw Conversation About Mental Health

In today's episode I want to bring something that's coming from many conversations I've had this past week. It started with a conversation with the photographer friend of mine. He lost a major job at Microsoft and started taking his photography from a hobby to something serious. He wanted to build upon it. He had an old camera and decided that he being a tech guy that he is it needed to be upgraded to a much better one.

But a friend, also a photographer, told him: "you don't need to change the camera, you just need to change lens". He convinced them to upgrade the lens attached to the camera and not get rid of the camera itself.

This made me think deeply about how we view ourselves. What role mental health can play in that. It's not about changing the camera, which is you per se. It's about change the lens, how you see things.

Since then, some other conversations have come up that really made me think about what I want to bring to you today. Mental health has caused many people to try to discard the camera, if you will, instead of changing the lens. The change of lenses changes perspective, a way of looking at things.

I want to tie this into not just mental health, but as a way of what lens you are looking through while still keeping the camera, which symbolizes you as a person. I want to look at some key specific roles where a change of lenses is far more effective than changing the camera itself. How you see yourself and what you're going through plays a huge role into the outcomes you can achieve. With that I want to have a raw conversation about mental health.

• Quote of the week: "talk to yourself like you would to someone you love"- Brené Brown

Points covered:

When it comes to looking at a different perspective, in other words changing lenses to the camera, I want to be able to dive into specific topics if you will that deal with this very thing. I want to be able to bring to you today ways that these pictures you may be seeing of yourself are actually distorted. Distorted pictures through various circumstances that I myself am very familiar with. And because of the familiarity I have with them is why I want to bring them to you today. In these different scenarios that I will be going to greatly affect mental health at a deep level. It's a matter of seeing a different perspective.

The first scenario that I am very familiar with is how mental health affect you at your job. Last week's episode I spoke about how the comeback continued and it spoke a lot about my loss of a job of almost 27 years. I spoke about this and last week's episode but I'm going to go deeper and in a different angle for the sake of what I want to bring today:

• Your job is a job not your identity
• How you are treated will affect you deeply both mentally and emotionally
• You may feel trapped but you have to realize that there's always a way out
• Do not let anyone make you feel any less of a human that you are already
• Learn the lessons that you can why were there because it will help you down the road
our existing

The second scenario I will speak of his family related. I come from an extremely abusive background from the earliest memories that I had as a child well into my adulthood. It's something that I have realized that I am still learning and recovering from. My relationship with my mother was anything but normal. Disclaimer: none of this is meant to diagnose or give advice, I strongly recommend should you need a professional opinion to not hesitate in seeking it:

• The abuse went through as a child
• The limiting beliefs it instilled in me
• How I'm learning not to hide even in a room where I belong
• The story of my mother-the final year and what happened
• Breaking family ties even when it's difficult because it feels like a betrayal but it's not
• Family upbringing greatly influences how we think and even creates certain conditions such as anxiety, depression, OCD etc.

The third and final scenario I want to talk about is being in a faith community. This gets very difficult to navigate for so many reasons.

Faith is something that can be deeply rooted in you but if engrained in the wrong way, it will do significant damage. I'm not here to tell you what to believe and what not to believe in. That's a journey that you must explore on your own. But I am of the thought of mind that no faith journey should strip you of your identity as a person or override your dignity as a human being:

• There's many ways of looking at is what two extremes are to either be deeply involved or deeply despised in anything to do with faith
• Of all the abuses I went through fortunately the worst abuse I felt in some of my faith communities was more emotional than anything else
• They can be deeply tied into how we think and even how we feel that we need to follow it and deviating it just brings another sense of betrayal
• My number one rule for faith is that it needs to build you up not tear you down
• Mental health is not fully understood in many of these communities

Listen to this week's full episode for my raw conversation about mental health and how you can overcome what you may also be going through.

If any of this is resonating with you then please reach out to me for a complementary Next-Level Dream Chat. It's only about 30 minutes to get started and get momentum working in your favor to get your breakthrough. If you want to take me up on this special offer then simply go to edwinsoler.com and go to the right side of my site and click on the tab that says contact Edwin and fill that form out. It's that easy. I'll be in touch with you shortly afterwards. I can't wait to hear from you!

This episode was sponsored by my book Closing the 18-inch Gap and is available on Amazon. To find it faster, simply go to edwinsoler.com/book. That will take you to the book page where you can click on the Amazon logo and order your copy right away. It's available in paperback, Kindle, and Audible.

Thank you for listening, in the meantime, keep closing that 18- inch gap!